Note: This is my own personal opinion, as a member of this board not a moderator, and I have *not* discussed this with admin.


I've noticed an increasing amount of negativity in here lately and think it's starting to get out of hand. (and yes, I do realise the irony in posting this! LOL)

From bad service to overheard comments to even being outraged on someone else's behalf! Pick your misery, it's all here.

When you go on and on about something annoying that has happened, you're taking that ten minutes of negative attitude and stretching it out to hours of misery, and not only that, you're dragging others into it too. It's not healthy, it DOES get you down, whether you realise it or not.

It's not what happens to you in life that determines who you are, it's how you react to what happens to you. You can't control what other people do, you can only control you. So choose to let it go, choose to focus on the half full, choose to be positive and you'll be amazed at how your life can change.

I had not noticed this, but I have not posted or read a lot lately - I have been busy with the secret pal swap. I can see venting, but perhaps not to the extent that it is sometimes. If they make light of it, that is one thing, if they don't entirely another.

I will take your words into consideration for myself. Thank you for posting this.

Everyone needs to vent, for sure, but there is a time and a place, and honestly I don't think this is it. This is a public site, it's kind of like standing in the middle of the town square and having a moan at everyone who walks past. ;)

Thank you. I come here to escape and enjoy my love of Quilting. Appreciate the reminder.

Thank you both for taking it in the spirit it was intended. :)

Blue Chicken, you are a kind Kiwi. I personally haven't noticed, but I try to avoid negative topics and things that hurt. I know if it hurts me, it hurts others. I like to just quilt and see the postings and share quilting stuff. Since I do not know any of you personally, I don't feel I should stick my nose in too often nor too deeply. I like my nose. (((( to all ))))

blessings,
Ruth

I read that venting is actually bad for you.

But yeah, I have noticed a lot of negative lately.

I usually just back out and go my own way. I do respond if something seems unnecessarily mean. I'm a half full kind of girl. I do love this forum in large part because it has not had so much negativity. I would like to see it stay that way, so I'm right there with you.

Raising my "half full" glass to you :D:D:D

When it gets to a certain level I think it's hard to ignore, and you can't "unsee" something once you've seen it.

I must admit, I'm a Libran and very true to form, so I find it very easy to see both sides of things. And I simply choose to believe the positive in most things. I give the benefit of doubt all the time.

My grandma used to say: Who cares if it is half empty or half full? If there is something in it, you won't be thirsty.

I agree it's hard to unsee things. I usually avoid opening them if they look like they will be yucky. And today, opened a new topic because the old one was getting defensive. ( I admit, I was getting defensive, about something I thought mean.) So- switch gears and talk about the topic in a way not fraught with emotion and finger-pointing.

(It was about being mean to fat people, which got a bit heated. My topic is about food rules and how we can all eat better- the book and idea of eating better food as a society. Not so many emotional buttons.)

I like the sound of your grandma hazeljane ;)

Hubby and I were having a discussion one day about someone we know who is constantly negative. He blurted out "her glass isn't just half empty, it has a hole in it, and it's leaking out, and it's red wine leaking onto white carpet!" Talk about laugh!

You have to feel pity for those people. What must it be like to live your life like that? I'm generally not a whiny person, but on my rare cranky days, I just shut up. My husband teases me about it. When I know I am totally irrational, I just don't speak. (I'm pretty sure it's hormonal)

My husband's ex-wife is a professional victim type. I keep hoping for her sake that she finds some joy in something. Anything! For me, it can be as easy as looking at some of the quilts folks make here, or a good cup of coffee in the morning and a kiss from a shy dog. I think the less than rosy times in my life have given me opportunities to find the blessings in the small sweet things in life.

It's funny you should say that. Some of the happiest people I know are the ones who have been to absolute hell... and come back from it. They're inspirational, and like you say, if you look hard enough you can find blessings in the smallest things.

Thank you Blue!!!

:D :thumbup:

Imagine what it's like to have one of those kind of negative people for your mother. She's been doing everything in her power to suck the joy out of life for everybody around her. And my sister is a whole lot like her.

It's really tough on a perpetual optimist!! I'm pretty much a silver lining kind of person.

I am a thankful my glass has anything in it person. I try to see the lighter side of life - my job is certainly working with the less cheerful stuff of life. We all have hardships in our lives. I come here to have a laugh, and I am grateful to the people who provide that. If you see a post of mine that is negative, don't hesitate to PM me and tell me to lighten up!
I love your avatar Blue Chicken.

I'm just going to answer the question. Half full.

No one cares to attend a 'pity party'. Get whatever is bothering you off your back and mind and get on with the day.
My g-son says "Cry me a river. Build a bridge and get over it."

If your glass is half-full just add ice and enjoy a full glass of sweet tea.

I am an optimistic person.. do have my "funk time" but most of the time my cup is half full!

Blue , thank you for the reminder. Oh, my cup runneth over. And we , I have gone through some things just like all of us, but I know that I am a survivor and I will. I would love to think that I can be some help to someone else along the way that may be going through something similiar. I saw that post this am and thought about saying I didn't know that people still did that. but just decided I would rather focus on some other things right now. Thank you, Jackie

Thank You.

I noticed that as well - and even tried to bring up the point (and a positive) in a thread, and six pages later, I think Patrice was the only one to notice that I had a positive (and her words soothed me!)

I get enough negativity at work and I use quilting (and the board) as an escape. I have found myself spending less time on the board lately, and more time at emboridery library to look for ideas and still be quilty.

I love the pictures and inspiration and kind words (four pages of complements on some of my recent posts - humbling!) on this board.

=) happy, positive, calming thoughts to all!


=)

I would say generally(90%) it is half-full, but there are on occasion times that my cup runneth over( days when I realize how truly blessed my family is) and then there are those few half empty times,hmmm .Thats when my tongue gets really sore from biting it so hard. :-D :-D :-D

I have a friend who goes even further: "Climb down off your cross, use the wood to build a bridge and get over it." Often I don't respond to negative threads because my impulse would be to say: get over yourself. If you are looking at the whole wide world, it's harder to focus on your own little problems.

My glass is half full with the occasional day half empty just to give me a reality check. I think it is important to see both sides of everything. I am here to involve myself further in something that I love to do and to share that with people who have the same interest. It is great when seeing what other people do and thinking I would never have thought of doing that - I might give it a try. love talking (is that the right word?) with everyone.

I think some people have problems articulating what they are thinking in the typewritten format. It sounds okay in their head but when it is put in writing it somehow loses something. I have been on many boards and this type of problem always comes up and usually the person that made the comment really didn't mean it to come out the way it did.

Everyone needs to take a deep breath, think twice before they hit send, don't read a topic if the title looks like it will go haywire, and have some tolerance.

My glass? It is always empty. I mean literally. I drink such huge amounts of liquid that I'm constantly going to the fridge to get more! :P

Yep, having been in the valley can certainly make you appreciate the view from the mountaintop. :) It certainly puts things in perspective and assigns a measure of relevance to daily events.

Most of the time my glass is more than half full. Sometimes I may not be happy with what is IN my glass, but that is not a problem either. lol I love the PDA for those days when things don't go well and I can "share" with my friends on the QB who care to read my nag-nag.

Now I do believe that it is OK to offer valid concerns and ctiticism but it needs to be constructive, and it should not become a feeding frenzy at the cutting table. (How do you like that analogy? teehehe)

For the most part, this is still a happy group. Sometimes I hear that someone has backed off or even jumped ship because someone else has gotten under their skin. I must admit that I have been pretty oblivious to those undercurrents and I think it is sad when it happens.

LMAO

That made me laugh madquilter... "i may not be happy with what is IN my glass"! LOL

Lots of really good analogy's, and really good attitudes. Perhaps those who see things in such a positive way need to be a little more vocal and steer things in the right direction when they're going astray. ;)

Mine is usually half full. I have my bad times but I find a postive outlook usually comes back to you.

Totally agree. I'm bad about just hitting the Back button when I see things going down the toilet here. I need to try to help instead. Will try to remember that. :)

I agree. Most of the time when a topic goes against my grain, I just don't check in there any longer.

Singing....a spoon full of sugar helps the medicine go down....the medicine go down...the medicine go dooooown.

Thanks guys. :-)

I am definitely half full until I feel as though I'd burst if I didn't say something. With some of the complaints about quilt shops, I just thank my lucky stars to have the ones that I have near me. My favorite saying is, "Well, if that's the worst thing that happens to me today, then I'm a lucky girl!"

Haven't noticed anything that appears negative in nature. Just because someone vents, doesn't mean they are negative or non-inspirational.

If you ever need to vent, you know how to PM me! There is a reason for everything, and it doesn't mean we are not greatful for what we have or who we are.

Perhaps our site is the only souce one has to share something with, depending on how you see it. If one is unable to share, regardless of the reason, this is unacceptable to me.

Are we not here to help, whether it be quilting or some other aspect of someones life? We can't assume we know things about a person on the other side of these forums.

May I share the following from Ane Morrow Lindbergh:

I do not believe that sheer suffering teaches. If suffering alone taught, all the world, would be wise, since everyone suffers. To suffering, must be added mourning, and understanding, patience, love, openmess amd the willingness to remain vunerable.

In everyone one there is something precious, found in no one else; so honor each man for what is h him - for what he alone has hidden within him - for what he alone has, and none of hos fellows. HISIDIC SAYING.\

New Zealand writer Katherine Mansfield 1888-1923---

I ALWAYS FELT THAT THE GREAT HIGH PRIVILEGE, RELIEF AND COMFORT OF FRIENDSHIP WAS THAT ONE HAD TO EXPLAIN NOTHING.

Everyone is entitled to their opinion and these are mine for whatever it is worth. :)

Helen

Great question
overflowing

Maybe it's me but I haven't seen a lot of negativity here. I've only been a member since March but I've been spending a lot more time here lately because I enjoy it so much. I admit though that I don't read every single thread and many I read I do not feel I need to comment on. I have been known by my own family to be a half empty person at times but I just don't see it here. This is a happy place for me.

My glass isn't half-full...it's FULL. Even during times others saw my glass as less than half-full, I didn't. I am blessed to be a positive person, and pretty resilient.

As for people venting here...it really doesn't bother me. I think we feel safe, that we are among friends, and that everyone will understand and comfort us when life kicks us.

I've noticed that members on this board are very open in discussing both the joys and the hardships of life, and all in all, there is much joy shared here. :wink: