tdgiffin

Well my suggestion is to lock them all into a closet, and let them out when they turn 21, but i do how well that one would go over. LOL

judy_68

I have two boys and I think raising boys would be completely different than than raising girls so I don't think I can help you.
Good Luck
Judy in Ohio

ladybug45

My daughter was slow to mature, she was still playing with Barbies when she was 13. Then a some point she turned into a "wildchild". We didn't have a problem with how she dressed or makeup.

I would wait up until she come home (at the right time) and would go to bed thinking everything was right with my world. Found out months later she was sneaking out after I was asleep.

I would take her to school on my way to work and by the time I would get to work the principal was calling asking where V was.

Always after she would get into trouble she would say "I guess you don't love me now". I would tell her there's nothing you can do to make me not love you, I just don't LIKE you right now.

She has since turned into a very loving, kind adult . We are best friends and she can't make it through the day without calling me at least twice.

Seems they go into some kind of trance and then when they get 19 to 20 years old they wake up.

So, just hang in there. At the time it seems it's going to last forever. But it does end.

Millstream Mom

I'm Mom to 15,17 and 19 yr old girls. There is no crisis so great that it can't be discuss calmly and rationally (even when you want to scream, cry and pull your hair out..) To every problem there is a reasonable compromise, and sometimes the hardest part is being willing to accept a reasonable compromise! Nothing will heal your soul and give you peace as much as a heartfelt hug and 'I love you Mom!' Eventually we all make it through, and the rebellion stages give us lots of things to laugh about. I still cringe when Mom gets out my "Rebellious teen" pics - good Lord - parachute pants?! Headbands?! What was I thinking?!

Barb M

Gosh, i've just read this whole thread, and the memories! lol I have two grown daughters. I guess what was a turning point for me, was when the oldest was only 11, i caught her with make-up on, and i flipped, and said no way, no how. And so for the next few weeks it was a constant battle with us. So i was telling our pastors wife this, and i thought for sure she would take my side of this lol, but i was quite shocked at what she told me. I said i didnt wear makeup until i was 15, and the girls that wore it at 13 and 14 were considered sluts. So she says, when you started wearing it at 15, thats when most girls were wearing it, so it was ok then, right? And i said right. She said that's why at 15 it didnt make you trashy. She said, i see girls at 8 and 10 wearing it now. So if Cathy is 11, in todays estimation, that would not be trashy now, because the other girls are all wearing it at 11 too, right? And i reluctantly said right. She said if she was 9, and one of the first in her group to be wearing it, then no, but she just wants to be like all of her friends. She said i have to learn that her world is dif from what my world was. She said honestly, save the battles for something big. So i went home, and told my daughter she could wear a little bit of make-up, if i couldnt see it, but if i could see it she would have to wash it off. Well, that girl put her makeup on so discreetly, and that plan really did work. I guess when we have teenagers, we are constantly challenged with, what can i compromise on, and what cant i. My kids have thanked me for having strict rules with them, but i also saw, that the kids that had the strictest rules, were the ones that constantly rebelled. I guess im saying no guidelines is not good, but sometimes if we have rules, but with room for them to not feel theyre being strangled, it helps them keep the few important rules that they have. But you know, they always found a way to break the rules too. Like going to school in a sweatshirt, but then borrowing friends clothing at school. And they will break your heart. Our oldest at 16, had been asking to go camping with her boyfriend, well nooooo! lol So what did she do, one night she just went camping with him, did not tell anyone she was going for the night, i sat up the whole night crying wondering why she hadnt come home and what had happened to her. Yup, and she just didnt care. She knew she would be in trouble, but at the time chose to do what she wanted, scare me half to death, and pay the price after. Oh im so glad she has a daughter :)

plainjane

Boy, do I feel like an expert here! I've been ther,done that and wrote the book (not litterally). There are definitely stages, all related to hormones. I had only one daughter. When she was younger, she just wanted to dress sloppy-thank goodness that passed quickly. Then makeup-I bought her clear mascara and pressed powder and told her to go to town with it! That practice helped when she began to use "color" later-but I always said "no death circles"-no heavy mascara or liners! When she was a senoir in HS, she was trying her "knowing everything". She didn't want me to be around when Flag Line uniforms were chosen-I always sewed everything and knew fit. I just said "I hope you get the most ill fitting uniform on the line, then" and regretfull, she did, I had to remake it. My DH said we needed something for commom ground, so I bought a piano book of duets! Well, we had to work together and we had a lot of fun! College was the turning point. She began to appreciate all of the things I did to take care of her, since I was not accessable 24/7. Once she began to like a young man that I didn't think was her type-Mind you, you can't say "you can't.."! I just said "You know, you will never date anyone else." After a few days, he was history! Another, I just said, "I don't know why, I just don't like him." Was dumped shortly. When she introduced my future SIL, I immediatelyl liked him and said so. He is the BEST SIL I could ever ask for! I usually would make statements that would made her THINK! DD appreciates me for all of the big and little thinkgs I did for her and wants me to do for the GD everything I did for her. Great peace and loving EVERY minute! Every stage has to be dealt with separately and this too, will pass.

mzsooz

I always picked my battles carefully. One battle I chose not to have was over makeup, hair and clothes. I let my girls do what they wanted. We survived the Goth and Punk styles and I am now trying to survive the "scene" style with my 16 yo DD.

My theory is that teenagers are going to rebel. That is their nature. So I chose to let my girls rebel with their appearances. I let them have multiple piercings on ears only. No body or face piercings. Other than that they could do whatever. Neither of my girls tried drugs or sex. My oldest stayed pure til she was 20. Of course now she is a wife and mother! And my 16 yo is still pure. I consider that since I got them both this far that I made it. My youngest's friends all had sex when they were like 13! And they all either use or have tried drugs.

Every mother I know that was overly strict are the ones with the wild kids. I'm proud of my girls. They are sweet, intelligent, respectful, independent young women :D :D :D