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Thread: Too Funny

  1. #1
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    Too Funny

    WHY ATHLETES CAN'T HAVE REGULAR JOBS







    1. Chicago Cubs outfielder Andre Dawson on being a role model: "I wan' all dem kids to do what I do, to look up to me. I wan' all the kids to copylize me."





    2. New Orleans Saint RB George Rogers when asked about the upcoming season: "I want to rush for 1,000 or 1,500 yards, whichever comes first.."





    3. And, upon hearing Joe Jacobi of the 'Skin's say: "I'd run over my own mother to win the Super Bowl," Matt Millen of the Raiders said: "To win, I'd run over Joe's Mom, too."





    4. Torrin Polk, University of Houston receiver, on his coach, John Jenkins: "He treat us like mens. He let us wear earrings.."





    5. Football commentator and former player Joe Theismann: "Nobody in football should be called a genius. A genius is a guy like Norman Einstein."





    6. Senior basketball player at the University of Pittsburgh : "I'm going to graduate on time, no matter how long it takes.."
    (Now that is beautiful)





    7. Bill Peterson, a Florida State football coach: "You guys line up alphabetically by height.." And, "You guys pair up in groups of three, and then line up in a circle."





    8. Boxing promoter Dan Duva on Mike Tyson going to prison: "Why would anyone expect him to come out smarter? He went to prison for three years, not Princeton .."





    9. Stu Grimson, Chicago Blackhawks left wing, explaining why he keeps a color photo of himself above his locker: "That's so when I forget how to spell my name, I can still find my clothes."





    10. Lou Duva, veteran boxing trainer, on the Spartan training regimen of heavyweight Andrew Golota: "He's a guy who gets up at six o'clock in the morning, regardless of what time it is."





    11. Chuck Nevitt , North Carolina State basketball player, explaining to Coach Jim Valvano why he appeared nervous at practice: "My sister's expecting a baby, and I don't know if I'm going to be an uncle or an aunt. (I wonder if his IQ ever hit room temperature in January)





    12. Frank Layden , Utah Jazz president, on a former player: "I asked him, 'Son, what is it with you? Is it ignorance or apathy?' He said, 'Coach, I don't know and I don't care.'"





    13. Shelby Metcalf, basketball coach at Texas A&M, recounting what he told a player who received four F's and one D: "Son, looks to me like you're spending too much time on one subject."





    14. In the words of NC State great Charles Shackelford: "I can go to my left or right, I am amphibious."





    15. Former Houston Oilers coach Bum Phillips when asked by Bob Costas why he takes his wife on all the road trips, Phillips responded: "Because she's too ugly to kiss good-bye."


  2. #2
    Super Member quiltsRfun's Avatar
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    Funny! On #15 - you have to wonder how long that marriage lasted.

  3. #3
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    I don't know when he made that quote, but he's been married to his second wife Debbie for 21 years. I thinki he is supposed to have a great sense of humor.

  4. #4
    Super Member Kitsie's Avatar
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    And we idolize these guys and pay them millions? LOL
    http://s1248.photobucket.com/albums/hh485/KitsieH/
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  5. #5
    Super Member Quiltbeagle's Avatar
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    I always have to shake my head when I hear the players explain what happened in the BASSABALL game they just played. I can't understand even half of what they say! These are funny... or tragic. Can't quite decide. LOL! I'll have to remember that IQ hitting room temperature in January comment.

  6. #6
    Super Member Nanamoms's Avatar
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    These are funny but also sad!! Our kids just aren't getting a good education at all!! Schools are too busy being politically correct to teach reading, writing and math!!

  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by Nanamoms View Post
    These are funny but also sad!! Our kids just aren't getting a good education at all!! Schools are too busy being politically correct to teach reading, writing and math!!
    I beg to differ, schools are trying to teach kids every day.
    Being politically correct is only showing courtesy to all regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, or religious affiliation.

    Here in my town you have people angry and near violent when their children are tested and come up short regardless of the reason for the shortcoming. Then, blame it on someone or something else. The "dittohead" mentality is alive and well in east Texas.

    If you want a quality education for your child, get them one. Teach them to be responsible and to listen to the teacher instead of mouthing off. Send them to school fed and in proper attire for learning. Forgo the fancy clothes and expensive sneakers. Send them to school clean. Send them to school on time.
    Teach them to respect their teachers.
    Volunteer at your local school. Be a physical presence. Attend school board meetings.

    Most of all, show respect for the teachers yourself. To say that schools are too busy being politically correct to teach is disrespectful. But mostly, totally untrue. After all, if you can read this, thank a teacher.

    As someone who has worked with and for the school system in Texas for over 40 years, I have seen and heard a lot. Believe me when I tell you that most teachers want to teach your children. Most of the time the person who is the biggest impediment in their child's education is the parent.
    Now that is something that is sad but true.

    Forgive my rant, but I think that we mix up athletes with "normal people" when that is like apples and oranges. Most of the professional athletes went to school for training for athletics from early on. By eighth grade these kids have basically dropped out of school and gone into "athletic training education." Their parents are okay with it because what else do you do with a kid as big as a refrigerator and thick as a plank?

    It is a sad thing that an athlete makes more than a doctor, nurse, teacher, scientist, astronaut. That their opinions are valued more than those professionals. But we, the masses, are the ones that perpetrate the insanity. So we are to blame.
    Good night.

  8. #8
    Senior Member theoldgraymare's Avatar
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    One of the most promising young athletes at the local university was interviewed on the tv sports segment. When asked if he was going to major in physical education, the young man answered, "No, I'm majoring in P.E."

  9. #9
    Junior Member janceejan's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Iraxy View Post
    I beg to differ, schools are trying to teach kids every day.
    Being politically correct is only showing courtesy to all regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, or religious affiliation.

    Here in my town you have people angry and near violent when their children are tested and come up short regardless of the reason for the shortcoming. Then, blame it on someone or something else. The "dittohead" mentality is alive and well in east Texas.

    If you want a quality education for your child, get them one. Teach them to be responsible and to listen to the teacher instead of mouthing off. Send them to school fed and in proper attire for learning. Forgo the fancy clothes and expensive sneakers. Send them to school clean. Send them to school on time.
    Teach them to respect their teachers.
    Volunteer at your local school. Be a physical presence. Attend school board meetings.

    Most of all, show respect for the teachers yourself. To say that schools are too busy being politically correct to teach is disrespectful. But mostly, totally untrue. After all, if you can read this, thank a teacher.

    As someone who has worked with and for the school system in Texas for over 40 years, I have seen and heard a lot. Believe me when I tell you that most teachers want to teach your children. Most of the time the person who is the biggest impediment in their child's education is the parent.
    Now that is something that is sad but true.

    Forgive my rant, but I think that we mix up athletes with "normal people" when that is like apples and oranges. Most of the professional athletes went to school for training for athletics from early on. By eighth grade these kids have basically dropped out of school and gone into "athletic training education." Their parents are okay with it because what else do you do with a kid as big as a refrigerator and thick as a plank?

    It is a sad thing that an athlete makes more than a doctor, nurse, teacher, scientist, astronaut. That their opinions are valued more than those professionals. But we, the masses, are the ones that perpetrate the insanity. So we are to blame.
    Good night.
    Kuddos, I agree. Your childs education is what you make it. Active in their education, involved in their education and supporting the school and the system. Hundreds of teachers every year discontinue teaching for one main reason.....the parents.
    Life should NOT be a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in an attractive and well-preserved body, but rather to skid in sideways - Diet Dr. Pepper in one hand - chocolate in the other - body thoroughly used up, totally worn out and screaming "WOO-HOO, what a ride!!"

  10. #10
    Power Poster Jingle's Avatar
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    Some of it may be they are nervous and the wrong thing just slips out. Always give the benefit of the doubt.
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  11. #11
    Super Member NikkiLu's Avatar
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    Love this - I am emailing this to my daughter, she is a newspaper SPORTS reporter - I am sure she will get a chuckle out of these.
    Nikki in MO

  12. #12
    Super Member Nanamoms's Avatar
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    [QUOTE=Iraxy;4776741]I beg to differ, schools are trying to teach kids every day.
    Being politically correct is only showing courtesy to all regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, or religious affiliation.

    What was meant by "politically correct" is that it seems like more and more emphasis is being placed on race, gender, sexual orientation and religious affiliation rather than teaching the basics of reading, speaking well, writing well and knowing math and science. Everyday common courtesy, decency, morals and manners is not the definition of "politically correct". If we, as parents and teachers, treat EACH child the same w/o making a special class/subject to talk about these designations, then the children will accept each other without question. Children from an early age are very accepting. When they see/hear adults treating some as different or giving special consideration because of these designations, then they learn "political correctness".

    As parents to sons with children of their own, and sisters with children, we were and are active in the education of our children and we see how the public school system has changed, from the textbooks they use to the climate in which the teachers have to work. Having neighbors who are teachers (one is a principal), we have talked about what the public schools in our area (metropolitan but not inner city) HAVE to teach to meet federal standards. My niece is finishing her last year in college and will begin her student teaching next fall and we have discussed the differences as to what is being taught.

    I believe that teaching our children is a parent/teacher partnership. I also see the disrespect shown by even young children to their teachers and other adults around them. This stems from the home environment mostly and if emphasis is placed anywhere, maybe it should be on more parent participation. I have seen great teachers leave the system and I have seen bad teachers that can't be fired. I have graded 9th grade papers where the kids cannot spell simple words, make complete sentences or construct a story line. My friend who was teaching at that time said it was sad because she had to spend time teaching these 9th graders how to do 6th grade work. And this occurred in a Level 5 school system (the best federal rating).

    I also believe that good teachers should be among the highest paid professionals. The athletes we see making these "stupid" statements were not taught correctly, if at all, and probably more attention was paid to their athletic abilities than to their grades. Then we see the younger children holding them up as role models. Once again, the responsibility falls on the parents or a mentor to teach the difference in being well educated versus just playing a sport...or being an actor or singer or any of the other highly paid popular icons in our society. IMHO, our teachers need to teach the basics of education and not have the added burden of teaching PC social issues during the hours they have available to spend with our children.

  13. #13
    Super Member MaryKatherine's Avatar
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    I've maintained this for years. Some Athletes should not be allowed to open their mouths on National Television.
    Its a rare person who is well educated AND a gifted Athelete. It saddens me when I hear intelligent and educated parents talking about their child's future in terms of Sports Scholarships. Why do we have educated young people on our Olympic teams but the inarticulate (primarily young men) seem to dominate the big money sports.
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    Love, love, love #12! That seems like the answer of a highly intelligent person (with a good sense of humor!)!!

  15. #15
    Super Member caspharm's Avatar
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    It's sad that they make so much money, athletes and coaches alike. It's amazing that some of them actually when to college (at least for a little while). I know the 49ers had a lot of professionals on their team (lawyers, MDs) , etc but more "athletes seem to go to "college" for the chance to play pro and money, than education.

  16. #16
    Senior Member Suse's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Iraxy View Post
    I beg to differ, schools are trying to teach kids every day.
    Being politically correct is only showing courtesy to all regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, or religious affiliation.

    Here in my town you have people angry and near violent when their children are tested and come up short regardless of the reason for the shortcoming. Then, blame it on someone or something else. The "dittohead" mentality is alive and well in east Texas.

    If you want a quality education for your child, get them one. Teach them to be responsible and to listen to the teacher instead of mouthing off. Send them to school fed and in proper attire for learning. Forgo the fancy clothes and expensive sneakers. Send them to school clean. Send them to school on time.
    Teach them to respect their teachers.
    Volunteer at your local school. Be a physical presence. Attend school board meetings.

    Most of all, show respect for the teachers yourself. To say that schools are too busy being politically correct to teach is disrespectful. But mostly, totally untrue. After all, if you can read this, thank a teacher.

    As someone who has worked with and for the school system in Texas for over 40 years, I have seen and heard a lot. Believe me when I tell you that most teachers want to teach your children. Most of the time the person who is the biggest impediment in their child's education is the parent.
    Now that is something that is sad but true.

    Forgive my rant, but I think that we mix up athletes with "normal people" when that is like apples and oranges. Most of the professional athletes went to school for training for athletics from early on. By eighth grade these kids have basically dropped out of school and gone into "athletic training education." Their parents are okay with it because what else do you do with a kid as big as a refrigerator and thick as a plank?

    It is a sad thing that an athlete makes more than a doctor, nurse, teacher, scientist, astronaut. That their opinions are valued more than those professionals. But we, the masses, are the ones that perpetrate the insanity. So we are to blame.
    Good night.
    Thank you for speaking up. I totally agree with you.
    Susette
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  17. #17
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    YEA! Thanks for the good laugh. I know it is sad but it is still a good laugh.

  18. #18
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    Quote Originally Posted by Iraxy View Post
    I beg to differ, schools are trying to teach kids every day.
    Being politically correct is only showing courtesy to all regardless of race, gender, sexual orientation, or religious affiliation.

    Here in my town you have people angry and near violent when their children are tested and come up short regardless of the reason for the shortcoming. Then, blame it on someone or something else. The "dittohead" mentality is alive and well in east Texas.

    If you want a quality education for your child, get them one. Teach them to be responsible and to listen to the teacher instead of mouthing off. Send them to school fed and in proper attire for learning. Forgo the fancy clothes and expensive sneakers. Send them to school clean. Send them to school on time.
    Teach them to respect their teachers.
    Volunteer at your local school. Be a physical presence. Attend school board meetings.

    Most of all, show respect for the teachers yourself. To say that schools are too busy being politically correct to teach is disrespectful. But mostly, totally untrue. After all, if you can read this, thank a teacher.

    As someone who has worked with and for the school system in Texas for over 40 years, I have seen and heard a lot. Believe me when I tell you that most teachers want to teach your children. Most of the time the person who is the biggest impediment in their child's education is the parent.
    Now that is something that is sad but true.

    Forgive my rant, but I think that we mix up athletes with "normal people" when that is like apples and oranges. Most of the professional athletes went to school for training for athletics from early on. By eighth grade these kids have basically dropped out of school and gone into "athletic training education." Their parents are okay with it because what else do you do with a kid as big as a refrigerator and thick as a plank?

    It is a sad thing that an athlete makes more than a doctor, nurse, teacher, scientist, astronaut. That their opinions are valued more than those professionals. But we, the masses, are the ones that perpetrate the insanity. So we are to blame.
    Good night.
    I so agree with you. Thanks for your insightful point of view.

  19. #19
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    I agree with Iraxy except for the politically correct situation. I do believe in respect for one another and tolerance for others views. But I think PC has gone to far the other way. We had to take prayer out of our schools because a few challenged it, that is minority rule, but it is PC. In a school in Sugarland TX, they have a room for Muslims to pray but Christians cannot have their prayer in school. I am not against Muslims, I think we should have all prayer in school. I think the different religions could take turns and if you are agnostic or athiest, don't listen.
    It is what it is ...deal with it.

  20. #20
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    Amen, Iraxy!
    Yes, we do need to be "politically correct" because who wants to put up with bullies, ignorance, racism, sexism, etc.? And yes, reading', writ in', 'rithmatic are VERY important. But a lot needs to come from parents and it's just not happening. Then teachers are blamed for everything while the parents make up excuses for their children. These "children" do drop out because all they can think is athletics then they become the class clown to cover up for their own short-comings in their education, disrupting the education of every student in class.
    Sorry too for the rant: this started out to be a funny post.

  21. #21
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    Sorry, galvestonangel, but prayer is NOT allowed in school just so we won't disrespect others AND to adhere to the basic teachings of the founding of our government: SEPARATION OF CHURCH AND STATE.
    How would you feel if we had a "christian" prayer every day at school/work/wherever, and you are Jewish or Muslim or Hindu or atheist? That 'little act of prayer' tells you that you are different. Where's the tolerance there?

  22. #22
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    I have 2 children who have taught for 20 years and they are adament in that the biggest impediment to a child's learning is the home environment. Parents who send children to school hungry, without 8 hours sleep, who do not know if their child can read much less understand the lessons, who do not keep a drug and alcohol free home, who do not keep a safe home; the list is endless. Parents who do expect the child to stay in school during the day or even to go to school. Parents who do not want their children to have a better life than they have. And unfortunately these problems are not limited to any one economic status. Schools now need to teach all the subject matter they always taught plus what used to be taught in the home and church. How much history can you teach in one session if that day you need to address bullying or an issue brought up by the assault of a student? In the schools where there is a large number of illegal aliens there are cultural issues that frequently interfer with a child's learning. Unfortunately, the illegals are not the educated citizens of another country and frequently do not have an understanding of how to help their children learn and being illegal they keep a low profile, which means they do not go to school to meet with teachers, etc. The problems facing many teachers are overwhelming.

  23. #23
    Senior Member Kim Bohannon's Avatar
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    that is too funny! thanks for sharing
    I quilt for my sanity!

  24. #24
    Super Member damaquilts's Avatar
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    Iraxy.. This is so true. I do not buy the teacher is Always right(like when I was a kid) but it has gone the other way now where the teacher is Always wrong. I know my child will do whatever they can get away with ... I always laughed at the parents that said MY child would never do that so it must be ??? ..... I also know people who stopped teaching because it was more crowd control and paper work then teaching. Sad. Also it is sad that these sports figures get paid more than teachers. And they get away with things that no teacher would in a million years.

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    The teachers are teaching-the kids choose not to learn... As the old saying goes -You can lead a horse to water but you can't make it drink -

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