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Thread: Bargaining Power

  1. #26
    Senior Member Linda58's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by mlaceruby
    My Hubby likes toys!
    toy tractors,trucks,matchbox etc
    He never says a word.
    and if I mention that I know I spent alot
    his comment is well you will use it eventually!

    today is my 25th anniversary! and my DS and his wifes 1st!
    HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!!!!

  2. #27
    Senior Member Mimito2's Avatar
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    I was organizing in my sewing room on Sunday and DH wandered in and made the comment that "All this crap needs to go" meaning my sewing machines and stash. I tartly told him that this room (an 8x10) was Off Limits to him and none of his concern. Just like his 3 -20 ft containers that he has his "stuff" in is off limits to me. That was unless he was willing to share. He quickly retreated to the TV. We have been married 33 years and he still has hoof-in-mouth disease. :-)

  3. #28
    Senior Member Moon Holiday's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sunflower Girl
    Stopped by WalMart while in Amarillo yesterday, and told husband I just needed a little bit to work on some purses next week. Well, after we got out of the store, he said, "I thought you said it was only going to be about $12?" (It was $30) I said, "I think you spend that much on beer for a week." That shut him up. About 10 minutes later, he agreed and apologized! See, you just have to know the right words to make them think!
    I cannot stand the thought of having to ask DH for $$, so I have always had a job (sometimes working as little 1 day a week) just to ensure that I have money so I don't have to ask for his. Right now I have 2 part-time jobs and DH keeps the checks from one to put towards household expenses and I keep the checks from the other ... which is used for anything I want (including buying his birthday gift). Now I always feel like I can buy anything I want... I know how to budget and save... that is how I got my Janome MC11000se

  4. #29
    Senior Member Angellight's Avatar
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    I thought this would be appropriate to this conversation. It is an old one, but funny...

    Jim -The Thoughtful Husband...


    It is important for men to remember that, as women grow older, it becomes harder for them to maintain the same quality of housekeeping as when they were younger. When you notice this, try not to yell at them. Some are
    over-sensitive, and there's nothing worse than an over-sensitive woman.

    My name is Jim. Let me relate how I handled the situation with my wife, Peggy. When I retired a few years ago, it became necessary for Peggy to get a full-time job along with her part-time job, both for extra income and for
    the health benefits that we needed.
    Shortly after she started working, I noticed she was beginning to show her age. I usually get home from the golf club about the same time she gets home from work and although she knows how hungry I am, she almost always says she has to rest for half an hour or so before she starts dinner. I don't yell at her. Instead, I tell her to take her time and just wake me when she gets dinner on the table. I generally have lunch in the Men's Grill at the club so eating out twice is not reasonable. I'm ready for some home-cooked grub when I hit that door.
    She used to do the dishes as soon as we finished eating. But now it's not unusual for them to sit on the table for several hours after dinner. I do what I can by diplomatically reminding her several times each evening that they won't clean themselves. I know she really appreciates this, as it does seem to motivate her to get them done before she goes to bed.
    Another symptom of aging is complaining, I think. For example she will say that it is difficult for her to find time to pay the monthly bills during her lunch hour. But, boys, we take 'em for better or worse, so I just smile and offer encouragement. I tell her to stretch it out over two or even three days. That way she won't have to rush so much. I also remind her that missing lunch completely now and then wouldn't hurt her any (if you know what I mean). I like to think tact is one of my strong points.
    When doing simple jobs, she seems to think she needs more rest periods. She had to take a break when she was only half finished mowing the lawn. I try not to make a scene. I'm a fair man. I tell her to fix herself a nice, big,
    cold glass of freshly squeezed lemonade and just sit for a while. And, as long as she is making one for herself, she may as well make one for me too.
    I know that I probably look like a saint in the way I support Peggy. I'm not saying that showing this much consideration is easy.! Many men will find it difficult. Some will even find it impossible! Nobody knows better than I do
    how frustrating women get as they get older.
    However, guys, even if you just use a little more tact and less criticism of your aging wife because of this article, I will consider that writing it was well worthwhile. After all, we are put on this earth to help each other.

    Signed
    Jim

    EDITOR'S NOTE:

    Jim died suddenly on May 27 of a perforated rectum.The police report says he was found with a Calloway extra long 50-inch Big Bertha Driver II golf club jammed up his rear end, with barely 5 inches of grip showing and a sledge
    hammer laying nearby. His wife Peggy was arrested and charged with murder. The all-woman jury took only 15 minutes to find her Not Guilty, accepting her defense that Jim somehow, without looking, accidentally sat down on his
    golf club.

    Happy Quilting!
    susan

  5. #30
    Super Member QBeth's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MomtoBostonTerriers
    In our house, DH and I have an unspoken understanding. DH would never dream of complaining about how much time I spend on my relaxing, creative scrapbooking and quilting hobbies and the lack of time I spend on housework. I would never dream of complaining about how much time he spends sitting at that stupid, waste-of-time, waste-of-money, brain-sucking computer and the hundreds of hours spent talking to his friends about the same dang topic over and over and over, and the lack of time he spends on the dead and dying lawn and landscaping.
    Tell us how you really feel! :-)

  6. #31
    Super Member QBeth's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by CarrieAnne
    LOL, I went to a Model T show yesterday with BF, walked around forever, asked questions, it was fun, but a total GUY thing. So we go into the resturauntand they had a really neat quilting book, so I made him buy it for me!
    My solution to car shows...

    Singer hand-crank - a quilting I did go!
    Name:  Attachment-90882.jpe
Views: 12
Size:  61.0 KB

  7. #32
    Super Member willferg's Avatar
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    My husband has never complained about the amount of money I spend on fabric (and I'm pretty thrifty about it, after all) but he does wonder at the bulk of my stash.

    I'm ready for him if he ever does complain, though. He golfs every week, sometimes twice. You know how much fabric I could buy with the cost of a round of golf? I spend many happy minutes thinking about that...

    Laurie

  8. #33
    Super Member dphelps's Avatar
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    Angellight, I needed that. I have not laughed that loud in awhile. That is just too good. With that, I am adding that I have no DH, or anyone else fot that matter, besides my- self to answer to about my stash, etc. I do find it hard though to restrain myself when I find a good deal on fabric. I have to talk to myself very sternly and sometimes it even works.

  9. #34
    Super Member klgreene's Avatar
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    hehehehe my husband both smokes and drinks beer.....I have pointed out to him that he spends so much more money on those cancer sticks and liver eater than I spend on my quilting and mine will last for generations, he will not live as long as the quilts will. He never says a word.....he also plays golf.....sooooo I don't think I have to worry.

  10. #35
    Super Member MistyMarie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by raptureready
    Sometimes those DH allow their mouths to start up before engaging thier brains. Yesterday mine said, "You're so busy sewing that you're letting the things you're supposed to be doing (laundry) slide. You need to quit messing with that machine." I didn't say anything for a little while. When I was ready to leave to go do the grocery shopping I said, "It took a lot of nerve for you to say what you did about my sewing. The only things I've been working on are things for you, the grandchildren and great grandchildren---nothing for myself. I'm going grocery shopping now. While I'm gone perhaps you could do some work---on your attitude or even the laundry." He was better when I got back. He knows better than to tell me what my "job" is but sometimes he forgets. Bless his heart.

    More often than not, they just need a little reminder that there are TWO adults in the house that can do things... not just one!

  11. #36
    Super Member Charleen DiSante's Avatar
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    Guess what: My DH also moved the TV into my quilting area on the third floor. He says it's being together just to be in the same room even if I have the sewing machine humming while he has the remote humming. He knows I'm enjoying myself and we are not so far removed from one another being on different floors. He also likes to encourage me. Like I need it!! LOL
    I don't know for sure but maybe he realized that quilting is not 'just cutting fabric into small pieces so you can sew it back together into a large piece' That comment went over liike a lead balloon. Gotta love him! Sorry I went on so long.
    Quote Originally Posted by dsb38327
    Quote Originally Posted by cminor
    Thats funny!! I made a deal with my husband that when I buy fabric - I also get him some fishing lures :) Worked like a charm. He is so happy to get his lures, he does not even notice my Walmart fabric! :)
    I remember your telling us this in other posts too. I liked it then and I like it now. :lol: I think my husband could be dangerous in a fabric store. It is his habit to get two of everything and 3 if he thinks I will like it a lot. I have moved my sewing space into the sunroom where he spends his time with the remote and recliner. He feels more included in my quilting and shows interest from start to finish. He has never minimized my fabric, yarn and craft collections. His toys are far more expensive than mine and he is the first to know it!

  12. #37
    Senior Member janethagy's Avatar
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    My DH says that quilting makes as much sense as jumping out of a perfectly good air plane.
    You take a beautiful piece of fabric and cut it up just to sew it back together again.
    I tell him its the end result that matters..hehehe

  13. #38
    Senior Member BRenea's Avatar
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    My DH understands my quilting habit, but every time I buy fabric I usually buy him something too. That way it's "hey honey, look what I bought you...oh, and I bought some fabric too." :D

  14. #39
    Super Member sewmuchmore's Avatar
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    My huband toys are for more expensive tractor, trails. So he does not say anything to me. He happy and I happy.

  15. #40
    Super Member Charleen DiSante's Avatar
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    and that's the way I like it ah huh, ah huh, that's the way I like it!

    Quote Originally Posted by sewmuchmore
    My huband toys are for more expensive tractor, trails. So he does not say anything to me. He happy and I happy.

  16. #41

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    I've been marred for 44 yrs. my DH has been disabled most of that time! So I have worked. Now I'm Retired, I like to sew, make quilts and buy fabric. He would not dare say anything about what I spent on my fabric or any other sewing. I have earned it and he knows when he better off. I'm not being salffish. But I have a desent retirement & he only has SS. Our Money is our Money but He has no right to say any thing

  17. #42
    Super Member aorlflood's Avatar
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    When my DH says anything about how many sewing machines I have I just ask him how many saws, or hammers, or other tools he has.

    He says, "yes, but each one does something different". To which I reply, "and the same with my sewing machines!"

  18. #43

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    To Rapture Ready:
    I would love to know the name of the pattern of the quilt that is in your side bar on this blog.
    SweetRosie

  19. #44
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    I LOVE that "Jim" story......I could insert my husband's name in that story, and it would almost match him word for word......and I have almost felt like Peggy several times. However, he never says amything about my spending money on my quilting hobby. He says, "You pay the bills, you know whether we can afford it or not." LOL

  20. #45
    montanablu's Avatar
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    I count my blessings - my DH never complains about what I spend on fabric. In fact, nearly every time we travel he will stop at quilt shops with me. While in Arkansas last year we stumbled upon a shop hop - he drove me to 9 out of the 13, all on those wonderful curvy hilly roads that were unfamiliar! He's a keeper!

  21. #46
    montanablu's Avatar
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    Guess what: My DH also moved the TV into my quilting area on the third floor. He says it's being together just to be in the same room even if I have the sewing machine humming while he has the remote humming. He knows I'm enjoying myself and we are not so far removed from one another being on different floors. He also likes to encourage me. Like I need it!! LOL
    I don't know for sure but maybe he realized that quilting is not 'just cutting fabric into small pieces so you can sew it back together into a large piece' That comment went over liike a lead balloon. Gotta love him! Sorry I went on so long.

    So sweet!! Mine often moves to the living room instead of his fav recliner in the family room because it's 50 feet closer to my sewing room:) He says he likes being close -Awww...

  22. #47
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    My Dh never says anything about my fabric collection or continued purchases. I'm not sure if he really even notices. He has never said anything ever about my spending on anything but several years back he took over the food shopping when our 3 boys were younger saying that I had enough to do with 3 little ones but I knew what he was thinking. He didn't realize food was so expensive and he felt this would lower the bills. After a few weeks he started cutting out coupons. He still does the shoping and I don't mind. I make out the list and he buys.

  23. #48
    Dee
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    Super Member Dee's Avatar
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    I spoiled my DH in the 46 yrs. we are married, but he has never complained about my fabric or machines. In fact he encourages me and will stop at the fabric store when we go to the VA-45 miles from here. So I guess he spoiled me big time.

  24. #49
    Senior Member puck116's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Sunflower Girl
    Stopped by WalMart while in Amarillo yesterday, and told husband I just needed a little bit to work on some purses next week. Well, after we got out of the store, he said, "I thought you said it was only going to be about $12?" (It was $30) I said, "I think you spend that much on beer for a week." That shut him up. About 10 minutes later, he agreed and apologized! See, you just have to know the right words to make them think!
    I've tried that same logic on my husband, but it didn't work. I still have to sneak the fabric into the house.

  25. #50
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    That is to funny. I use to have to do things like that when I could work, and had money. God bless. Penny

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