pumpkinpatchquilter

Hmmm...you have me thinking about how much I talk and how it might be perceived.

I urge you to give her another chance. I think if it becomes a situation where none of you can tolerate to be around her you need to have a conversation with the ladies of your group that you meet with and decide if you want to continue meeting somewhere else - and make it a CLOSED group. Meeting in a home or some where more private where you have control over who joins might be a good idea so you can keep the group what you want it to be.

That being said, being a hyper chatty Cathy myself, I might be heart broken if someone came to me and told me that I talk too much for their group and I need to cut it out or leave. That's just me! Sometimes I can be one sided but it's truly unintentional. More often than not I'm just excited or happy to be there! I am on average 30 years younger than most of the ladies in my group too - and it's obvious I turn some members off. But isn't that part of life? Personality clashes are inevitable in a public group setting...and the ladies who enjoy my chattiness have become my best pals. That doesn't mean there aren't some who avoid me like the plague or that there aren't those that I avoid too!

You never know, the issue could resolve itself also. She may have felt the vibe of the group and may decide not to come anymore. I hope that you'll give it some time and try to be understanding as much as you can.

BellaBoo

People that have been there and done that usually have or they wouldn't be talking about it. Listen and learn something about the person. You may be surprised.

SueSew

If I were new in a town, without a husband after many years, looking for friendship, and I got past my shyness enough to introduce myself to a group of people with a like interest, and ask to join and share the common interest, and I was told I could join and then got treated poorly, I would be very hurt. Maybe if you don't want to make new friends you should not meet someplace where the opportunity to do so arises.

I do hope you are kind to her, and give her a chance, as Oma and BellaBoo said. Maybe she will become a new friend. Maybe she will come to a few meetings, decide you are boring, or worse, and I hope she treats you well on her way out. LOL

What ever happened to letting a little fresh air in? That's when life happens.

Tudey

I think Oma66's answer was far more compassionate. You can't buttonhole people into a "type" based on one encounter.

leighway

I'm a chatty one, as well. One of the first answers here on the board intrigued me. Bella Boo talked about Auntie Mame and how the woman HAD been everywhere and DONE everything and most of the time, what she knew was right.
I've traveled the world because that was my job. I've seen many things that perhaps others haven't. I know a lot because I am a life long student of information I find interesting. And, it's my natural bent to share with others because I like people. I'm not trying to lord info over them. I want to share so that they can enjoy and benefit from what I know. And....I can see where others might find that threatening or mis-interpret what I'm saying as lording it over them, especially if their world view is smaller than mine. I also am human and get nervous...and I've found I needed to reign it in so I do. But, I'm largely (now) an extroverted introvert...a loner. I like my own company and only share with those who seem to want what I have. It's as hard for me to keep a body cast on, as it must be for those around me to open up and listen. Have a heart. This woman, once she gets over her nerves may know things that make your lives more interesting. And, if she really is a twit, think of all you can learn in terms of patience, humility and love by working with her and welcoming her. It really is true that all of life is lessons, lessons, lessons.

MOLLYDOOKER2

I agree that everyone needs a second chance - if only to see if the new medication is kicking in!!! just kidding !!!

Neesie

Okay, I have to say this . . . even if someone jumps onto me, for saying it.

In defense of non-chatterers -
It's true many chatterers know a lot and just love to share. However, many non-chatterers also know a lot and are also very intelligent. Sometimes non-chatterers just get TIRED of others trying to explain/instruct/advise/educate them. Sometimes they get TIRED of others assuming they don't know anything, just because they don't constantly flaunt their knowledge. Sometimes they just get TIRED of having to politely nod and smile, while craving a bit of peace and quiet.
Very often, a chatterer's "sharing" comes across as bragging, whether or not he/she realizes it. Sharing is nice but should be an exchange, not a bombardment of me-ism.

Yes, non-chatterers need to be tolerant of chatterers. However, chatterers need to be tolerant of non-chatterers, as well.

Okay, I'll now climb off of the soapbox and go hide in a corner, for a few minutes.

BellaBoo

I remember when our Chatty Cathy was talking up a storm at a workshop. She was at a table behind me. I said ____, are you talking to yourself or do you want comments? I said it in a fun way and she laughed and said Oh, I'm running off at the mouth again, I'll be quiet for awhile. You have to speak up and say what's frustrating you but remember the other's feelings too.

Carol34446

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I agree FroggyinTexas, judge not lest ye be judged. One meeting is not enough to know the heart and soul of the lady. And if her non stop chatter is enough to break up the group you were not much of a group. If no one has backbone enough to take her aside and tell her she needs to tone it down then personally I would not want to be part of your judgemental group who seems to think your better than anyone new who you don't give a chance to.
Seems to be the way people are today, hense the "you dissed me attitude" and people need to grow up and act like adults not childern throwing temper tantrums because they don't like how some one treated them.

Carol34446

Nessie, you are totally right, tollerence of differences in people seems to be gone these day with many people, and strength of character to speak up if necessary to person also seems to be gone. Political correctness is wrong in so many ways what ever the forum. Honesty was far better.