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Thread: Did I really break my promise?

  1. #1
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    I promised my husband I would not buy any more material for quilting until I finished the WIP's I had on the shelf (there are now only 5 of them). Well in starting one of them I realized I had no coordinating fabric for the back...so off to JoAnn's I went.

    My husband say's I broke my promise!

    One of my daughters said "nope no promises broken...that is for the back and you only quilted the front".

  2. #2
    Super Member Butterflyblue's Avatar
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    Well if you needed the material to finish one of the said WIP, surely that doesn't count? Right?

  3. #3
    deema's Avatar
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    I don't consider it a broken promise to buy fabric to complete a project you promised you'd complete.

    I makes me feel like one of those chicken or egg things. You promised to finish the WIP before buying more fabric, but you couldn't finish the WIP without buying more fabric. Leaves you at an impasse. Maybe if you'd mentioned it to him before heading to the store, he wouldn't feel like you'd broken the promise?

  4. #4
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    How did he expect you to have a back for the quilt?

    Although some people piece together the backing, most have a back made from all of the same fabric. The exception to this unless a turn down is added to the backing, which would be blocks or a design co-ordinating with the top.

    Without the backing (just purchased) it would continue to remain a WIP.

    The other way to look at the top, is that it's a completed top, waiting to be sandwiched for quilting. Put it in the completed (tops) pile.

    Pam M

  5. #5
    Super Member chairjogger's Avatar
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    that is the same problem I am finding with my own stash.. there is scaps, some just enough fabric, others, not enough of that fabric..

    really hard to do.. just don't promise . ha ha

  6. #6
    Senior Member cowpie2's Avatar
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    I agree with your daughter, you need the backing to complete the quilt, thus still working on a WIP.

  7. #7
    Super Member AngieS's Avatar
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    Well, maybe next time you could put the one that is needing more fabric at the end of the line. This way it's last and then you'll be done with the others and just finishing up that one. Make sense? Still don't think you broke the promise. Really you know us quilters have to stick together. We think the same on a lot of things like this. :) Good luck finishing all of your WIP so you can go buy more. =)

  8. #8
    Super Member knlsmith's Avatar
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    Well you promised you would FINISH it competelely, all the way, done. You had to put a back on it, or you would be wasting batting and fabric for a quilt with no back! Lol. No promise broken.

  9. #9
    Super Member jillaine's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by deema
    Maybe if you'd mentioned it to him before heading to the store, he wouldn't feel like you'd broken the promise?
    I think Deema nailed it. Most of our partner-woes can be boiled down to lack of or mis- communication.

    And really, it doesn't matter what WE think about whether or not you broke your promise. (We're not married to you.) The key is: your spouse felt you did.

    I would simply apologize, and then come to a revised agreement about what you should do if/when this situation occurs in the future.

    Best to you,
    Jillaine

  10. #10
    Power Poster MadQuilter's Avatar
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    Without the addition you could not finish the project. It's simple. No promise broken.

  11. #11
    Senior Member I wonder's Avatar
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    Nope, you didn't break your promise in my book. Couldn't finish it without it so trust me, he will be happy with the final project once its done!

  12. #12
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    No don't think you broke your promise.. How can you finish your WIP if you didn't have the fabric in your stash.

  13. #13
    Charity Quilter's Avatar
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    I Wonder.............I agree with you!

  14. #14
    Super Member SuzyQ's Avatar
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    I don't think so. You promised to finish the WIP and you needed supplies to do it ... you didn't buy the fabric for a new project. Heck, if DH was building shelves and ran out of nails wouldn't he buy the nails to finish it? Seams like the same thing to me. :)

  15. #15
    Super Member LucyInTheSky's Avatar
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    My rule is always that if you're working on a UFO/WIP and need additional border/backing fabric, it's okay. You just have to get to right about when you're ready to use it (rather than buying it and keeping it for a year)

  16. #16
    Power Poster sueisallaboutquilts's Avatar
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    Nope! Quilts have to have backs, just like people hahaha

  17. #17
    Senior Member crochetetc's Avatar
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    I would say it depends on what his definition of finished is. And if the top was completed and only needed backing?

    If the top was incomplete and I went shopping for a back, I think that would be breaking the promise.

  18. #18
    Super Member fabric_fancy's Avatar
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    in my house that would be considered breaking the promise since i have an extensive stash and surely could have found some fabric that would work for the backing.

  19. #19
    Senior Member cmw0829's Avatar
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    Nope, this doesn't count. No rules broken.

  20. #20
    deema's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jillaine
    Quote Originally Posted by deema
    Maybe if you'd mentioned it to him before heading to the store, he wouldn't feel like you'd broken the promise?
    I think Deema nailed it. Most of our partner-woes can be boiled down to lack of or mis- communication.

    And really, it doesn't matter what WE think about whether or not you broke your promise. (We're not married to you.) The key is: your spouse felt you did.

    I would simply apologize, and then come to a revised agreement about what you should do if/when this situation occurs in the future.

    Best to you,
    Jillaine
    That was my line of thinking - mis-communication. I'm glad someone saw that...I was worried some might see it as "asking permission"...which is something I never do in my marriage...but I do tell him what purchases I plan to make for the simple fact that the money is all coming and going from the same place and we should both know about it. While I don't see it as a promise broken, I can understand why he might feel that way, especially if there were not any mentioned "stipulations" to the agreed to promise (such as making a purchase to finish a project). I agree that it might be a good time to create such a stipulation, should this situation arise in the future.

  21. #21
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    Quote Originally Posted by deema
    Quote Originally Posted by jillaine
    Quote Originally Posted by deema
    Maybe if you'd mentioned it to him before heading to the store, he wouldn't feel like you'd broken the promise?
    I think Deema nailed it. Most of our partner-woes can be boiled down to lack of or mis- communication.

    And really, it doesn't matter what WE think about whether or not you broke your promise. (We're not married to you.) The key is: your spouse felt you did.

    I would simply apologize, and then come to a revised agreement about what you should do if/when this situation occurs in the future.

    Best to you,
    Jillaine
    That was my line of thinking - mis-communication. I'm glad someone saw that...I was worried some might see it as "asking permission"...which is something I never do in my marriage...but I do tell him what purchases I plan to make for the simple fact that the money is all coming and going from the same place and we should both know about it. While I don't see it as a promise broken, I can understand why he might feel that way, especially if there were not any mentioned "stipulations" to the agreed to promise (such as making a purchase to finish a project). I agree that it might be a good time to create such a stipulation, should this situation arise in the future.
    I agree with these statements.

  22. #22
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    Quote Originally Posted by deema
    Quote Originally Posted by jillaine
    Quote Originally Posted by deema
    Maybe if you'd mentioned it to him before heading to the store, he wouldn't feel like you'd broken the promise?
    I think Deema nailed it. Most of our partner-woes can be boiled down to lack of or mis- communication.

    And really, it doesn't matter what WE think about whether or not you broke your promise. (We're not married to you.) The key is: your spouse felt you did.

    I would simply apologize, and then come to a revised agreement about what you should do if/when this situation occurs in the future.

    Best to you,
    Jillaine
    That was my line of thinking - mis-communication. I'm glad someone saw that...I was worried some might see it as "asking permission"...which is something I never do in my marriage...but I do tell him what purchases I plan to make for the simple fact that the money is all coming and going from the same place and we should both know about it. While I don't see it as a promise broken, I can understand why he might feel that way, especially if there were not any mentioned "stipulations" to the agreed to promise (such as making a purchase to finish a project). I agree that it might be a good time to create such a stipulation, should this situation arise in the future.
    Let me state for the record - this is/one of those fun "spats" we are having our 20 year anniversary on the 15th - if this is all we are arguing over we are doing great.

    I bought quilt binding today - he just laughed and said "what for the WIP's and not a "new" quilt?" I said yep....then he called me a promise breaker!

  23. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by SuzyQ
    I don't think so. You promised to finish the WIP and you needed supplies to do it ... you didn't buy the fabric for a new project. Heck, if DH was building shelves and ran out of nails wouldn't he buy the nails to finish it? Seams like the same thing to me. :)
    SuzyQ: I used this on him when I came back from Wal Mart with my quilt binding...he started cracking up laughing and said "YOU went to the quilt board with this didn't you?"

    guilty!!!!

  24. #24
    Super Member sewmuchmore's Avatar
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    Just tell him that you were caught in a catch 22. You can't complete your promise until youbuy the fabric for the backing. :XD:

  25. #25
    Super Member Kappy's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by pamkasperi
    Quote Originally Posted by SuzyQ
    I don't think so. You promised to finish the WIP and you needed supplies to do it ... you didn't buy the fabric for a new project. Heck, if DH was building shelves and ran out of nails wouldn't he buy the nails to finish it? Seams like the same thing to me. :)
    SuzyQ: I used this on him when I came back from Wal Mart with my quilt binding...he started cracking up laughing and said "YOU went to the quilt board with this didn't you?"

    guilty!!!!
    Or if he started driving and he had only the steering wheel and no brakes!!!! I bet he'd fix the brakes, but it's still called driving!

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