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Thread: Do non-quilters have any idea of the work that goes into a quilt?

  1. #1
    pal
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    Has anyone else had the experience of not be thanked for the gift of a quilt????? This has happened to me three times!! Do non-quilters have any idea of the work and thought and time that goes into the process from the beginning to the last stitch????


  2. #2
    Senior Member Shelley's Avatar
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    I've always received a thank you. But, I don't really think non-quilters have a clue.

  3. #3
    Super Member mpeters1200's Avatar
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    I don't think non-quilter's have any idea. But, if they make clothes or something like that, they have a hint of the time and thought going into one. But...only a hint. I've heard it takes more patience to make a bed size quilt than an ensemble. But, since I don't sew, I don'thave a clue about that!!

  4. #4
    Super Member candi's Avatar
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    Pal, I am a very beginner quilter, and to be fully honest with you, I had no clue about all the work involved in making a quilt. I could see that they are pretty, and I guess assumed it took work, but never really knew what went into it, UNTIL I started learning about it and made my first wall hanging, which was a lot of work, can not imagine the work for a bed quilt.
    I am so sorry that people you gifted quilts to did not appreciate it, I would immensly :-)

  5. #5
    Super Member blahel's Avatar
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    I dont think most people have a clue as to how much work goes into a quilt and not to mention expense. i think most people think that homemade items are made to save money but the opposite is mostly true and it often costs at least twice as much as a commercially bought one.
    I recently made my niece a diaper bag and a baby blanket and put a lot of thought and work into it. i made a lovely label and hand embroidered his name etc. The only thanks i got was from her mum (my sister inlaw) and all she said was Naomi said thanks for the gifts. That was all. It would have been nice to receive a thankyou card from my niece and maybe even a photo of her and the baby as i also bought a book and a soft toy. I should have not expected that as for her 21st my mum and i went halves in a gold bracelet for her and i have never been thanked for that either.
    I usually dont make quilts for other people unless they admire what i am doing and then i usually make them a gift for a special occasion as i am fully aware that non quilters dont always want or like quilts but that is their choice. I was just hurt that my niece couldnt even send a card herself to say thankyou.

  6. #6
    Power Poster SulaBug's Avatar
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    I have to agree with everyone else too!! You can't imgaine all of the time, work & expense that goes into any quilt, unless you have made one yourself. I only make quilts as gifts for my family members & dear friends that I know will appreciate them. It is very disappoingting to give a hand made gift of love & not get a thank you in return. Because I love to sew so much I keep making them anyway!! :D


  7. #7
    Super Member Marcia's Avatar
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    I do not think non quilters have any idea how much time----and money!!!!----go into the making of a quilt. BUT--every quilt I have made and given as a gift was very much appreciated. My granddaughters drag theirs all over the house--they are always snuggling under one somewhere. My kids love theirs and want more! My mother in law actually cried when I gave her one--said it was her most treasured gift ever. I made a chicken quilt for a friend recently and she was absolutely speechless. And I have family members and friends who claim they are waiting in line for a quilt!! So, even though they are clueless as to the amount of work--I do feel loved and appreciated for my gifts.

    I am sorry Pal, that your time and work has gone unappreciated.

  8. #8
    Moderator Up North's Avatar
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    I knowhow it feels, I made a quilt for my girlfriend and she offered to pay me. Well she gave me $20.00 I had hand quilted it at that. It is a good thing I enjoyed doing it but I see it now and it is not really being cared for, You would think she got it at salvation army. It hurts my feelings but I don't say anything after all it is hers now to do with as she pleases. I just won't make her any more.

  9. #9
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    This just happened to me! I spent a lot of time (and money!) creating a wedding quilt for my cousin's son and didn't even get an acknowledgement that they received it. Don't think I'll be making a baby quilt when the time comes. But usually the people I've made quilts for have been so appreciative. My daughters both love theirs and use them all the time, my aunt uses hers sparingly so as not to "ruin it", but keeps it on display. Got one back when my dad died, but he used it all the time. There are others... :lol: (too many to mention) who also have appreciated theirs and that just tickles me to death!

  10. #10
    Super Member mary quite contrary's Avatar
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    I'm selective who I make them for. Nonquilters for the most part have no clue. I would rather give them to a homeless shelter or Linus. That way I am not expecting a thank you.

  11. #11
    Senior Member Kara's Avatar
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    I've experienced degrees of gratitude. Anywhere from, "oh.... thanks," as it gets shoved back in the box, to "OMGosh! That's beautiful!" accompanied by kisses and hugs.

    And I have certainly experienced the "have no concept of time, effort and money that went into the quilt", too. The ones willing to pay for the work, know about the work. Others must think you have a magic wand and can conjure one up in a day.

    It's very discouraging. But if you think about the people, you can almost know who's going to appreciate it and who won't. For example, my brother would much rather buy a "bed in a bag" every 2 years than have a quilt that would last years and years. My sister on the other hand, would rather have the home made quilt. But she knits, so she has a clue.

  12. #12
    Senior Member Stitching4Fun's Avatar
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    My daughter made a baby quilt for her husband's aunt when she had one of her children. I thought my daughter did a nice job with it, but the aunt did nothing but complain about it. Not about the workmanship on it, but because it was home made. She told her flat out that she would never use it. I thought that was so rude of her. She said that she was afraid it would come apart and her child would get hurt with it. Needless to say, my daughter never made another thing for her. The aunt is one of those people that if it isn't store bought, it must be trashy.

    My son, on the other hand, loves what I make for him. I made him a quilt close to ten years ago and sent it out to be quilted. Well, the quilting stitches have started to come out of it. Since then I got my own longarm and this past Xmas I made him another one. I asked him about the first one I made him and told him that I will fix the quilting in it. I had hoped that he wouldn't have already thrown it away. When I mentioned that, he told me that he would never throw it away no matter how bad it got. So I know that anything I make for him he will keep.

    Barb

  13. #13
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    Im sorry to say I won't give any more of mine to my mother. She has 2 of them, one is a show quilt that I hand quilted. She used huge nails, lots of them to hang them on her walls. I was beyond speechless when I saw this. What made me so angry is that she makes quilts too, or at least the tops. Now, those 2 quilts have huge holes and rust rings all over them. Irrepairable damage. Lots of people at work, one lady in particular keep asking me how much I'd charge to make a quilt. I quote the cost of fabric plus 250.00. She wants to pay 50.00 and I buy the fabs, no way! well, she'll get her chance at one of mine but for a good cause next Christmas. I'm making a donation quilt out of Pepsi driver shirts that we will raffle off to make money for our adopt-a-family we do each Christmas. She can buy 50.00 worth of raffle tickets and take her chances.

  14. #14
    Senior Member Kara's Avatar
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    People don't see it as the investment it is.

    It's a shame that we've become such a fast-paced society and few recognize the value of these items.

  15. #15
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    Wow, some of you have had some real rude reactions to your hard work. I had no idea the work that goes in to a quilt, so I know that no one else does either.

    The friends I made a baby quilt for recently did not acknowledge the gift. I had to get my brother to give it to them as I couldn't visit on the day they invited us. I had to email and ask if they opened it, only then did I get a thank you. Feel so deflated that all that hard work I put into it and I didn't even get a phone call to say thanks.

    I think Kara and Mary are right - you should pick and choose who gets a quilt! But despite all this, the actual making of a quilt is so enjoyable and rewarding and we should all be proud of ourselves, even if others are not so impressed (I'd like to see them try it!!!)


  16. #16
    Super Member Dodie's Avatar
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    I do not give quilts for wedding gifts anymore the first one the couple got ab annulment within 6 months and the second I never did get a thank you for and just to much work to give to people that does not care now I put them in a shop for sale and just sold another last week at least I know they are wanted and cared for just my oppinion

  17. #17
    Super Member Butterflyspain's Avatar
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    Well I think that if you have given someone something they should at least say thankyou, if they donīt then they would not get another. I gave my Sonīs last girlfriend of 5 years a set of really nice white gold jewellery and I never got a thank you. Bet she wondered what happened this year because she got nothing!!!!

    Elle

  18. #18
    Senior Member sew_lulu's Avatar
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    A girlfriend said to me once to never give quilts as a gift b/c it's nott on the registry is for.

    Another one is begging me to make one for her daughter. I guess you'll just have to pick and choose who to give it to.

  19. #19
    Member Lynda in TN's Avatar
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    I go wandering thru craft shows, etc., and am awed by the prices. On my budget, I can't afford most earrings, much less a quilt. And for so long I thought they just charged outrageous prices because it was "hand crafted" and they could. Then I learned to quilt. Even with cheap fabric and tying a quilt, there is a LOT of money in it...so a good quilt, quilted by hand or machine, is worth big bucks. I have made several tied quilts out of good fabric. I have only given two away...one to my son, who doesn't use it "because he's afraid he'll ruin it" so it lays over in a corner folded up. I don't know what the grandson did with his. I am told he uses it and really likes it. And he did thank me as if he liked it (at only 13 years old). His was painstakingly done to replace a little blanket he carried around as a kid until it was in rags...and probably still has. John Deere. Beautiful quilt. But I truly have no one to give one to who would appreciate it. I did, however, sell one to a friend. Actually, my quilt teacher/friend sold it to her...I could not have charged her for it and would not have known what to charge. It was a simple but beautiful quilt as you go string quilt with a beautiful back (two sided, actually). She paid $300 for it and she cherishes it...won't even let her hubby get romantic till she takes it off the bed! I cherish my quilts. Unfortunately, I don't know anyone else who would.

  20. #20
    Super Member Barbm's Avatar
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    I made a quilt for my niece's birthday. Yes, it took a long time and it was late, but I really put a lot of effort into this quilt. It now sits, for about 2 months now, on the quilt rack in my sewing room waiting to be picked up. I'm seriously wishing I had the nerve to email her mother (my snotty sister) that it has been abandoned and reverts back to me. I won't call her as she feels she needs to lecture me every time I speak with her.

  21. #21
    Zoo
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    Wow, I thought it was just me?

    About 9 or 10 years ago I made 2 quilt tops, one for my husband's parents and the other for his brother and his wife as Christmas presents.
    These where the second and 3rd quilts tops I had ever made and not wanting to try and quilt them myself or knowing about LAQs I drove them 2 hours away to be hand quilted by a Mennonite women. I was very happy with how the tops turned out and ecstatic on how they looked all put together once I got them back.
    When the family opened the gifts on Christmas the enthusiasm was under-whelming, I could have bought my brother/sister in law a new coffee makers and gotten the same reaction, 'tho my Mother in law was a bit more enthusiastic.
    I was upset and a bit pissed and didn't make another quilt top for years.

    Now I'm careful who I give hand-made projects to, I do have 2 quilts at a LAQ's being finished for me, they're going to my friend's 2 daughters, but I know both my friend and the girls will appreciate the quilts and take care of them.
    I think it really depends person-to-person on whether someone will appreciate any hand made gift.
    Zoo

  22. #22
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    Each of my kids were given a quilt, when they moved out to their own place the quilts went with them. My kids all saw me sewing, they saw the time it took to put a top together, and the hours spent hand quilting, so they had some appreciation of the work that goes into a quilt.

    One day I went to visit my oldest son and his wife, as I pulled into their driveway I saw his quilt laying on the ground. His wife had used it to put the baby on outside, instead of bringing it back in she left it there. It had been rained on repeatedly, and was covered in mud because their dog had dragged it across the yard and was using it to lay on when the dog was tied out.

    When I found the words, I asked if that was my son's quilt, his wife casually stated, 'oh yes, it's old so I just let the dog have it." :shock:

    Needless to say I won't be making another quilt to replace that one. I did make my oldest granddaughter a quilt and it was washed in hot water with bleach....

    So no, non quilters have no clue how much time, money and love goes into a quilt.

  23. #23
    Super Member Bill'sBonBon's Avatar
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    I do get my thanks But nonquilters really do not realize what time and effort plus money that goes into a quilt small or large. Most in my experience think because you use a machine it doesn't take no time at all. They can't believe it takes sometimes months to finish one. Depending on the size and complexity and time involved. So I just tell them if you think it is so quick and easy I will be willing to instruct you on a small simple quilt. After i get through explaining most get the picture but some don't.
    Bill'sBonBon

  24. #24
    Senior Member Missi's Avatar
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    I echo a lot of the sentiments above. People just have no idea how much work and money goes into a quilt. Because of that I pic and choose who gets quilts for presents.

    I made a quilt for my college roommate for her wedding (my avatar pic). I knew she would appreciate it and I got her involved. She picked out the pattern and the colors then I made her go on the Kansas City Metro Area quilt shop hop to find the fabric. She is arts and crafty so she didn't hate quilt shopping all day. She was flabbergasted at the prices!

    My standard baby gift is a rag time flannel. They take a little less work and can be cheaper. Most of the time I get a huge response at the shower. How much use they get in the real world not sure.

  25. #25
    Super Member Barbm's Avatar
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    I made a simple split rail alternating with a wide panel to showcase some pretty fabric quilt for my newest great nephew (where is that kid- he was due the 6th!). My sister knew I made it and told her DIL. They refuse to use it, they bought hangers and put it on the wall. I told her it was made to be used, but she refuses to use it because it's so nice. I'm making another quilt- made to be used- out of scraps, backed with fleece so she won't think it needs to be saved. This is my sister, 15 mos. younger than me, who I am very close to.

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