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Thread: Not so subtle hint - what would you do?

  1. #26
    Super Member azwendyg's Avatar
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    It sounds like what she's telling you is that she would love to have a quilted bag made by you. It seems like she knows she can't afford to commission work from you, but if you are good friends, why not "gift" her a nice quilted bag. On the other hand, if your conversation with her made you feel like she was trying to take advantage of you, then you certainly shouldn't feel obligated to do work for her for free. Follow your heart and enjoy your craft!
    Wendy

  2. #27
    Super Member AZ Jane's Avatar
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    Two cents, two cents, two cents. There are all levels of friendship. It would have to be a "from childhood, went thru life and death" type friend for a gift of a king size quilt. Not that I don't love my friends but it would have to be a very special friend. When requested, I might consider saying something along the lines of "I'd love to but LAQ are up to $$(pick a number)$$$ now and I just don't have that kind of money right now." And let it drop, think how surprised she will be if you do present her with a new bag!!
    Better to do something imperfectly, than nothing perfectly.
    Done is better than perfect.

  3. #28
    Power Poster Mariposa's Avatar
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    Do YOU want to make her a gift-? Just because, and not out of guilt or obligation? Then I'd suggest making her a bag, or perhaps a table runner.
    Maybe offer to teach her how to sew, so that she can join you in your journey..............
    Be a blessing to others, as you may entertain angels unaware!

  4. #29
    Super Member Grace MooreLinker's Avatar
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    the quilted bag would be just fine since she talked of it also. friends should not make you feel guilty on things like this.
    Freedom is costly and quilting keeps us busy...

  5. #30
    Senior Member lenette's Avatar
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    She said she has always wanted a quilted bag, so I'm sure she would be thrilled with one!
    Lenette

  6. #31
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    I think some people think one can make things 'for lots less' than things would cost when purchased ready-made.

  7. #32
    Senior Member katieranch's Avatar
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    I tell my friends and family that if they want a specific quilt, they need to buy the fabric (and Pattern) and for a nominal fee I will make it as I have time. Most don't follow through once they see how much the fabric alone costs.
    One more material Girl~

  8. #33
    Super Member Wanabee Quiltin's Avatar
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    I would make her a beautiful bag in colors and style that she likes. I am making my 2 best friends a bag for Christmas in christmas fabrics that I will give them on Dec. 1st so they can use them the whole month. I just made a King size quilt for my daughter and I bought all the fabric, batting and backing on sale and it still cost me $200 with the Longarm fees. I doubt your friend knows how much it costs to make a king size quilt. Make her a purse now.

  9. #34
    Power Poster BellaBoo's Avatar
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    I don't like people saying something is too expensive for them to buy but think it's cheaper for me to make it? It usually is cheaper but that is the savings for me, for knowing how to make the item, not to save them money.
    Got fabric?

  10. #35
    Super Member starshine's Avatar
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    Why not invite her to take a beginners quilt class at the LQS? She will at least learn a little about the process even if she doesn't want to make her own quilts. And let her know that you could maybe do a bag much sooner than the quilt.

  11. #36
    Super Member GrannieAnnie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tashana View Post
    A friend dropped by yesterday and while we were talking she asked me how much would it cost to buy a king size quilt. I gave her a range of prices to my best knowledge. She asked if smaller quilts would be cheaper and decided that going to Target would be the closest to what she could afford. A few minutes later she tells me that she always wanted a quilted bag but they were too expensive and then she starts rattling off brand names and prices. I would love to make her a bag, but I know I cannot do a quilt right now because the timing cannot be more wrong, and besides I cannot quilt a king on my DSM. I know it is stupid to even ask, but if it were you would you be happy if I made you a nice bag instead of a quilt? Sometimes down the road I will make the quilt for her for sure because I will be taking LA classes at my LQS in order to use their machine. Thank you for your opinion. By the way I love hints because they save me the agony of figuring out birthday and holiday gifts.
    This is a friend??? I'd make her a pound cake and offer her some coffee. You'll never please her.
    Bad Spellers of the World
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  12. #37
    Super Member katkat1946's Avatar
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    If it's to be a surprise, I'd go with something small like a table topper and make it a seasonal item. My thinking is that if the person wasn't in on the selection process (fabric and pattern) no matter how much the finished product may be beautiful, there is still a chance that it won't be in the recipient's taste. By being seasonal, she won't feel she HAS to have it out year round but you also get to see her reaction and pick up hints for possible future surprises!
    Pat

  13. #38
    Super Member roserips's Avatar
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    I think a quilted bag or tote is perfect, and no way would I make a king size quilt for anyone with today's costs the fabric alone would be more than I could afford let alone the time and effort to create one.

  14. #39
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    I am always grateful for any hand made gift that I receive because I KNOW the hours that went into making it. However, those that don't sew or quilt have no clue as to time and expense.
    Do what is in your heart and you will feel good about doing it...even if it is to buy her a gift.

  15. #40
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    Maybe tell her of your time constraints and offer to take her shopping for the supplies she will need to work on her quilt (which you generously offer to help her make--after the holidays). I'd be willing to bet that after she sees what it will cost to buy ALL of the supplies, she will change her mind and go buy one of the $100 ones at KMart!

  16. #41
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    Do you usually exchange gifts or give a gift to this person?
    Do you WANT to give her anything?

    Would you usually give her an item with the 'retail value' of what she is asking?

  17. #42
    Junior Member jodyma's Avatar
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    Oh no, I must be too direct. A casual acquaintance asked me to make her "grannies" scraps into a quilt and she would give me the scraps that are left as payment. I assumed she meant me buy the binding, backing, thread and batting. I quicky told her the cost in time, labor and material and she hasn't asked again. I don't think people realize the time and money that goes into making quilts.
    Jodyma

  18. #43
    Super Member oldtnquiltinglady's Avatar
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    I have had these "requests" happen to me all my life--people simply do not realize what goes into the process of making something "home made"--and most of the time do not appreciate the effort made when you do make or do something that was "hinted" or "suggested"--can you tell that I am in a "down mood" this am???? But how do you correct that thought process? They can't help it. And the next thing you know, another friend has dropped off your list of BFFs.
    Make every day count for something!

    JoAnn

  19. #44
    Super Member GrannieAnnie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jodyma View Post
    Oh no, I must be too direct. A casual acquaintance asked me to make her "grannies" scraps into a quilt and she would give me the scraps that are left as payment. I assumed she meant me buy the binding, backing, thread and batting. I quicky told her the cost in time, labor and material and she hasn't asked again. I don't think people realize the time and money that goes into making quilts.
    She'd let you keep the leftover scraps?????????????? I'd give you all my scraps, too! LOL
    Bad Spellers of the World
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  20. #45
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    I would make her a bag, since that is something she would like to have and you probably have time to make one for her. Take care.

  21. #46
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tashana View Post
    A friend dropped by yesterday and while we were talking she asked me how much would it cost to buy a king size quilt. I gave her a range of prices to my best knowledge. She asked if smaller quilts would be cheaper and decided that going to Target would be the closest to what she could afford. A few minutes later she tells me that she always wanted a quilted bag but they were too expensive and then she starts rattling off brand names and prices. I would love to make her a bag, but I know I cannot do a quilt right now because the timing cannot be more wrong, and besides I cannot quilt a king on my DSM. I know it is stupid to even ask, but if it were you would you be happy if I made you a nice bag instead of a quilt? Sometimes down the road I will make the quilt for her for sure because I will be taking LA classes at my LQS in order to use their machine. Thank you for your opinion. By the way I love hints because they save me the agony of figuring out birthday and holiday gifts.
    Wow your very generous to consider making a kingsize quilt for a friend. I love my friends but here in Canada that would be a very costly gift. Your offer to make her a bag sounds great. And please excuse me for asking Tashana but what very happened to the quilt your were working on using the Elmer School glue? Did I miss the pic? I used a school glue from the dollar store and guess what........it stuck but the glue hardened like a rock!! I'm afraid what it might do to my needle! Yes I know Elmer School glue was what I was supposed to use. Sometimes being cheap comes back to bite you where the don't shine, lol.

  22. #47
    Super Member margecam52's Avatar
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    I'm going to be a meanie here, and I rarely am... I would do nothing. When someone tries to use a sideways complement to get me to do something like this...I ignore them completely...they get nothing.

    Not because I don't want to, but because it becomes expected...next thing you know...everyone expects the same from me. I can't afford that.

    At present, I just spent 80.00 on fabric...I don't need fabric, I have 2 rooms of fabrics...but we have a great grandson due in February (none of what I bought is for his quilt, had that already)...we have a great nephew, two great nieces with babies due by March 2013...I want to make a quilt for all of them. So I asked two of them...for themes (my mistake). One wants pink & brown monkeys (I only needed to add one fabric), the other wants hot pink and black with zebra prints. That (other than black) I didn't have. So I ordered 45.00 worth of fabric online...won't mention who I got it from...quality is not good at all. several faded after washing, and are more decorater wieght, not quilt weight...but were listed as quilt fabrics. one has a black ink streak every 18 inches...so to use it, I'll have to be fussy cutting my pieces. Today, hubby agreed...that I needed good fabrics...so off to Walmart...our Lubbock, TX (4th and Franklin) has a great new fabric department. I paid 4.98 a yard for five fabrics. From the other company...what has the same prints as Walmarts...5.96-8.98 per yard...did get free shipping. Customer service was excellent...so much so, when she offered to send a postage label for return, I refused. Customer service is that important to me. I'll use these others in purses or pillows...or something. Tomorrow...I go to a different town to check that Walmart's fabrics...I know they had a lot coming in...maybe I'll find some goodies there.

    I have a grand niece I made a quilt for two years ago...and since she was in Japan, I also included one for her 8 year old son...just a sample I made up, more lap size than anything else. This grand niece's mom in law insisted I make a quilt for her grandson (the stepson of my grand niece)...this young man didn't know me, never was around me, and was not in Japan. So I told the lady that a quilt would be made if she provided the materials...never heard from her again. We see each other (small town), and it's not mentioned. Maybe one day this young man will get a quilt, but not any time soon. Had he been in Japan, or had I known him personally...he would have had a quilt.

    I don't like pushy people...dealt with them for over 30 years...don't have to anymore.

    Quote Originally Posted by Tashana View Post
    A friend dropped by yesterday and while we were talking she asked me how much would it cost to buy a king size quilt. I gave her a range of prices to my best knowledge. She asked if smaller quilts would be cheaper and decided that going to Target would be the closest to what she could afford. A few minutes later she tells me that she always wanted a quilted bag but they were too expensive and then she starts rattling off brand names and prices. I would love to make her a bag, but I know I cannot do a quilt right now because the timing cannot be more wrong, and besides I cannot quilt a king on my DSM. I know it is stupid to even ask, but if it were you would you be happy if I made you a nice bag instead of a quilt? Sometimes down the road I will make the quilt for her for sure because I will be taking LA classes at my LQS in order to use their machine. Thank you for your opinion. By the way I love hints because they save me the agony of figuring out birthday and holiday gifts.
    Marge Campbell
    TL18LS/Qbot automated quilter
    http://www.Lmcampbel.com

  23. #48
    Senior Member Pepita's Avatar
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    I agree that a bag would be a wonderful quilt. This last Christmas I sent place mats that I made, and I had dyed the fabric, and gel printed fabric, and embellished it. I was astonished at the overwhelming approval! Make something YOU like, and I will bet she will like it too. The only thing I will suggest is that if she is someone who always wears purple--or something like that, I'd make it in the color she always wears. I can't think of a nicer gift.
    Keep away from people who belittle your ambitions. Small people always do that, but the really great make you feel that you too can become great. Mark Twain

  24. #49
    Super Member Sandygirl's Avatar
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    Someone gave me a box of quilt squares to "sell" for her. It was complete with the fabric to finish the quilt top. Interestingly.....months later i did sell those blocks for her...and i had the buyer make the check out to the local animal shelter.

    Sandy
    Sandygirl

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    Singer Centennial model (inherited from my late, fav aunt!)

  25. #50
    Super Member Sandygirl's Avatar
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    Lets face it, most people have a hobby or pastime that is expensive. I cant paint a picture but i would not hint for one as a gift. Oil paint is expensive as is canvas, frames, etc.

    i think we can all use this line when asked to make a quilt or whatever for someone.....


    " my prices start at ...". A friend tells people that her prices start at $75.00 when someone requests a purse. Hey, "scraps" cost $12 yard too!

    Sandy
    Last edited by Sandygirl; 10-04-2012 at 03:10 AM.
    Sandygirl

    Janome 9900 / Janome 9700 / Janome Decor 3050 / Janome 1100D serger
    Singer Centennial model (inherited from my late, fav aunt!)

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