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When I took my first quilt class we were taught to fold the backing and the borders of the quilt and sew together or to fold the backing over and use it to finish the quilt.. I alos tie the quilt as it is to expensive to rent or have someone else quilt it on a longarm and to slow to do it by hand.
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I tied my very first quilt and like to tie them once in a while. The tieing method is so wonderful. I utilize the back fabric every chance it's large enough to and fits the quilt. They are all beautiful quilts that no one has ever mentioned not being perfect due to wrapped binding. I do not consider myself to have taken a shortcut in any way by binding that way. I agree, people who make you feel bad are miserable themselves. Usually by critisizing others it is a cheap way of making themselves feel better. In her defense, being a mother, her intentions are probably to help you rise to be better, the style is just wrong. Keep quiltig just as you are and be happy.
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go for it.
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I am a fairly new quilter. I tie all my quilts. I don't have a machine capable of handling the queen sized quilts I make. I am on limited income so sending out to be quilted is not in my budget. I also would prefer doing my quilt from start to finish.
I also have used the backing from my quilt to make my binding, by folding it over. Perfectly acceptable. There has been many a discussion on if you can call a quilt a quilt if it is tied. Sure it is. Tying quilts was done long ago, before sewing machines. Do as you wish, take your mothers comments with a grain of salt. We love our parents, but, don't always agree It's your quilt, it is made with love. That is all that should count |
It is your quilt, do it the way you want to. Have fun and ignore the naging. Be HAPPY.
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I have used that method also. It all depends if I want the binding to be the same color as the backing. That is not always the case. I usually use solid Kona fabric for backing since I do not make my quilts reversible or care as much about the back. I mostly add a binding that coordinates with the front of the quilt.
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What's cheating about that? Also, many people tie their quilts. Makes me miss my own mother even more. She bragged about anything I did (even all the mistakes).
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There is no right or wrong way to making quilts. You do what is right for you and your quilts. I often fold over the backing for the binding. I do both quilting and tying. Depends on what I feel is right for that quilt. Smile and gently tell your mom that you appreciate her advice but you like to try other methods as well.
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That's now cheating, it's just another way of binding. The purpose of binding is to hide the raw edges of the top, back and batting. I do this often on my "drag-a-bout" quilts. I am "one of those" whose backings are made to match the top in some was so this does look good. If I make an "heirloom" quilt or the back is very different from the front, I make a separate binding.
In my opinion, we often get caught up in the "rules" of quilting when in reality there are none. Remember where quilting came from and do it your way!! Have fun and don't stress. |
I agree! You are quilting because it is something you love to do! Enjoy it. I have a mother like that too -- always criticizing what I do or repeating stuff I tell her in confidence to my brothers and others -- so I stopped telling her what I am doing!
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No, you are not cheating. I have a quilt made by my grandmother back in the 40's. It has the backing folded over to the front for binding. (She used a good cotton for the backing so the binding has held up okay.)
My quilt is getting a little worn but I still love it. I have seen other quilts that my grandmother made and some of them have the regular binding on them. My grandmother was a very smart lady and if she thought it was okay to do it, then it was okay. Tying the quilt is okay too. My mother and grandmother have done it both ways. Some of their quilts were tied and some were quilted. (My grandmother quilted most of hers, but that was in the day when a group of her friends would come over; they would drop the quilting frame from the ceiling and all of them would sit around the frame and talk while they were quilting.....or maybe they quilted as they talked... :) I have an idea that the quilting was just an excuse to get together. Gee....if I had that type of quilting support, I would quilt it too. In later years, my grandmother tied several of her quilts because her friends had gotten ill or had died...(she lived until she was 95). Your quilting style is just fine and don't worry about the quilt police. Enjoy yourself. :thumbup: |
I'm sure your quilts are lovely, They are made with love.We all improve as we go.
My mother was much the same as yours sound she was the most unhappy person I have ever known.Could not understand why her 8 children didn't visit more. At the time I was 2000 miles away. Folding the back over is the way most were done and is still used by many. :D |
I don't think you are cheating at all. I know I've seen directions for doing the binding in a quilting book this way. I do remember one instructor saying that this kind of binding would not last as long as the separate binding because of the separate binding being double folded and thereby more durable so is this a concern? If not, why not? As to tying or quilting a quilt to me quilting means you need to do something to keep 3 layers together so you stitch by hand or machine, tie with yarn or floss, sew on buttons, use a decorative or non decorative stitch in place of where you would put the tie. It''s all quilting. Otherwise too boring and predictable. JMHO.
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Because you do it differently than another person doesn't make their way right and yours wrong....In my opinion it is always better to have a done quilt than an unfinished one sitting around no matter what techniques are used in them.
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I do it any way I want. I do baby quilts with the wrap over because I usually love the backing material, and I want it all around the front. So earier, but so cute. I'm working on a quilt as you go. the backing material, and sashing is the same material, so it doesn't make sense not to wrap around with the same fabric. Other quilts like wall hangings, I use muslin on the back, so I make a binding that sets off the quilt.. No rules, it just what ever you like.
PS. if that cheating, then wouldn't using a pattern be cheating. So I don't think so. |
Thats how I do it, always turns out ok for me, and it is only cheating if youuuu think it is
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The first quilt I ever made had this type of "binding". That was about 25 years ago, and the quilt is still in decent shape.
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Tell her you wanted to be "authentic" and make it like the old quilters did. It is a perfectly accepted way of binding the quilt. It saves fabric. Be sure your turn over is consistent and even with nice fine stitching. Tell her it is from a book of a very famous wuilter of the 19th century and you are being frugel and not wasting fabric.
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There is nothing wrong with binding your quilts this way and at least you get yours done and can use them! It is sad when someone will criticize you (and your own mother no less,but some do) and all they do are the tops. Perhaps her tops will end up at Goodwill or sold on an estate sell for a few dollars. You see it all the time. Keep quilting the way you want to and be happy with your quilts. They are made to be enjoyed and loved.
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Don't let her steal your joy!! I do a lot of mine that way. I feel it is best to not waste when you don't have to!!
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After a time, depending how much use, you may have to replace the binding as one thickness has a tendency to wear. If you need to tie...so be it. You could hand quilt and the quilt would be more valuable.
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Ha! I always thought that separate binding was because they didn't leave enough on the backing to do the binding the "right" way. No one ever told me different until I started looking up quilts online.
My grandmother always left extra on the back to bring to the front. It was always to me, stronger than the binding sewn on (we tugged on the edges alot when fighting for the covers)and it wouldn't tear off. For the last 26 years, my son has had his "tied" quilt and wouldn't trade it for anything. He barely let his daughter use it when she "found" it. He wanted to know why I sewed all over the quilt I made for her and her little sister instead of doing it like his. Some are just traditions that live long in family lines. If your quilt is made with love (and which one isn't) you made it the very best way that quilt was to be made. Heck with how you did it just that you did it is wonderful. |
Some people just like to gripe, complain and critizie others and it sounds like you got one of those. I married into a whole family like that. Whenever they start pointing out my mistakes I just look at them sweetly and tell them where the door is. (Okay, sometimes not so sweetly). I have always told my children and grandchildren if you can't say something nice then please don't say anything at all. I would probably tell my mother the same thing. (I have told my MIL before). Fix your quilts the way you want to. They are your quilts not hers. And NO, there is definitely not anything wrong with doing it your way.
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Quilts are as different as MOTHERS> there are good ones and bad ones... some are sweet and colorful, some are dark and shady. You get what you get. I can tell you a truth. There are no quilt police, There is no right or wrong way. There is you and a bunch of fabric, and your creation when you are done. I am a Mother 6 times over, and if I acted like your mom I would exspect my kids to politely say "OK MOM, you do it your way and I will do it mine."
My heart hurts for you, but you need to get elephant skin or tell you mother the truth~ |
Yours is a perfectly acceptable and legitimate method and frugal too! That method is in several books. So ignore any criticisms. Bless you for bearing your mom's negativity with patience.
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My mom was like that, I loved her to pieces but she was critical, I listened, thought "oh my, she's grouchy again today" and did it my way anyway.
I ALWAYS pull my binding over to the front, I really hate to hand sew my binding on, you can sew it on the machine when you pull it over to the front, looks really nice on the front and back if you use a decorative or blanket stitch (I'm assuming you have a sewing machine). I've never had a quilt machine quilted by anyone. I do a lot of stitch in the ditch, or X's to quilt. Recently I started to free motion quilt on my sewing machine. I do it in small sections so it's manageable. It takes practice, but it's fun so you might consider trying it out as an eventual alternative to tying some day. If you're doing all your quilts by hand, you can still do these techniques by hand as an alternative to tying as well. Nothing wrong with tying. There's something really comforting about a tied quilt. |
Take a deep breath - consider the source of your doubting yourself - do whatever makes sense to you. You are not sewing to please your mother - please yourself. It took me a few years of therapy to come to the realization that I could not do everything in life to please my mother (she sounds a lot like yours) and always do it her way. My way (in many jobs - not just quilting) has made me very happy with myself.
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I have done several quilts that way. Never had a complaint or problem. Maybe your mother is jealous that you are completing what you started and she can't bring herself to finish a project before starting another. Or maybe she doesn't know how. Perhaps she could take some lessons from her daughter. Even "Quilt Police" are not above getting pointers.
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I've done this! Looks fine, and saves time and uses fabric. Who could ask for more?
Quilt police come from all over - ignore them. They don't get it. |
You mean I have been "cheating" all these years? LOL Been quilting over 30 years and last year is the very first time I had a quilt professionally quilted. I really wanted the quilt but it was paperpieced and there were a bazillion seams that I did not want to hand quilt over. Hang in there. As they say, "Nothing lasts forever!"
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When I first learned to quilt, that was the method taught to me. Back then, I thought that was the only way to do it. Wise decision you made since you had plenty of leftover around each edge.
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You are not cheating, it's a good way to do a binding. I am new at quilting but mother did it that way all the time. Mother can be critical at times but enjoy them while they're still around. You'll get through this.
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I'm so sorry, you have to deal with that. You are not cheating, if you are happy, nothing else matters. If anyones cheating, it's your mother! Cheating herself out of having a wonderful relationship with her daughter. Definately her lose!!!
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Originally Posted by Airwick156
I am doing binding on my quilt. There is enough of the backing fabric that I can just fold it over on all sides and hand sew it for the binding. My mother just called me and asked what I was doing and I told her that I was doing the binding on my quilt. And she proceeded to say "How are you doing it? You cheating and just folding it over or did you make real binding for it?" in just her normal mean voice she uses with me whenever she talks to me. I told her I just folded it over, no need to waste the fabric when its already there. And I can't afford to buy the extra fabric. So I use what I am able to use. I see no problem with this but she sure does and definitely makes me will aware of that fact.
When I make a quilt, I complete the whole thing before I go onto the next one. I do have a few quilt tops, mostly lap quilts that I have not gotten the backing on. Now she has probably a hundred if not more Tops that will never get done as she only likes to make the tops. But yet she complains and tells me how to do my quilts. Most of the time I can remind myself to just "rise above it" and "this too shall pass" attitude, but this time it seems to have really upset me. Because not only did she say that she also told me that I was wasting all my time making quilts since I don't have the money to get them machine quilted. I tie all of them, but one day, I am going to be able to get one machine quilted. I don't think I am wasting my time not at all. I enjoy making them even though I am not very good at it, but I am learning maybe slowly but I am learning. Okay...that said..."this too shall pass" finally kicked in and now I'm waiting for "Rise above it". Maybe if I fix me a cup of hot tea that will help. LOL :) Thanks for letting me vent. Let's just say "the quality control board" has spoken and if your critic has any more slamming comments just send her to us! This is how all the older quilts were made until someone came up with the idea of making an add on binding. You are doing your quilt in "the original fashion." Next time anyone starts wth their critical crap tell them there is this great quilting board and they can ask us if their way is right or not !!! |
Originally Posted by Janice Thompson
After a time, depending how much use, you may have to replace the binding as one thickness has a tendency to wear. If you need to tie...so be it. You could hand quilt and the quilt would be more valuable.
I do my own quilting on my domestic Kenmore, if it is a large quilt takes some doing but I have always managed. :-D BillsBonBon |
Quilting rules are not etched in stone. You are not cheating, do it your way. Some folks just can't stand to see someone happy and making something different than "their" way. Had an aunt like that, no matter what I did there was something wrong with the method. I lost my mom very early, but I don't recall her ever criticizing my efforts.
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It's a shame that you and your mother both quilt, but can't share the joy in that with each other. It sounds like she is jealous or threatened with your enjoyment of your quilting and is trying to squeeze fun out of it for you. Don't let her make you feel bad. Find some quilting friends who are NOT competitive or judgemental and talk 'quilting' with them, instead!
Also, you might want to try machine quilting one on your sewing machine. You do not have to have a longarm, nor send your quilts to a professional to be quilted. I certainly don't. I'd feel like the quilt was only half mine if I didn't do all of it myself. |
I use the fold over method and a zig zag sewing machine stitch for those quilts I make for young people. The quilts are better able to last through thick and thin.
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Ask her when she was hired on as a member of the Quilt Police!LOL I bind my quilts with the backing all the time. It was how I was taught to do it. The only reason I ever use anything else is if I am running low on fabric.
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I have some quilts made by my great-grandmother and that it the kind of binding she did. I do the fold over kind sometimes too unless I want a contrasting color. The only advice I might have is that if you have enough extra of the backing fabric, fold it to double the thickness. Then it's just like if you were doing the add on binding! On another note...my grandmother was negative and critical like your mother...I just stayed away from her and her negative energy. And as several others have mentioned...she must be very insecure and unhappy herself to feel the need to treat others that way. Be happy, enjoy your hobby and be confident in whatever you make!
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