I've been going throu a period of depression I guess for lack of better word..and I haven't wanted to do anything...I haven't even been in there in over a month...I haven't touched a piece of fabric in just as long...even though I have some projects i'm supose to be working on...I just don't feel like it.I don't have any new fabrics, and i'm sick of the ones i have..and not to mention i'm running low, and can't get any more right now ( tough financial month )..I guess maybe I need some motivation and some good creative mojo juices flowing....help me...please!

Hang in there Jamie. We all go through tough times. You did the right thing turning to these people on this board. They are a loving and knowledgeable group. Sometimes forcing yourself to do something you just don't feel like doing is the best solution to pull yourself out of the funk. That is easier said then done. But do be creative in what you work on since sometimes these things will not turn out the way you would have liked. That is why when I feel like that I will pick up scraps and make something small just to feel productive and being creative is always a lift for me. Also I always find something on TV that will make me laugh. It truly is the best medicine.

We all go thru that at one time or another.
I've gone thru spells where I wouldn't even walk in the room.
Right now, I'm taking a break because I have this little headache that is tormenting me. Hoping it will be gone by tomorrow, 4 days is more than enough. I'm thinking it's just the heat and humidity that's getting to me. Our power has been flicking on and off and when it does, the house heats up REALLY fast, so when that happens, there's no way to cool the house down and headaches show up.

Just hang in there....start going thru the pics here or just Google search and maybe something will "bite" you. :)

Is there other stuff going on in your life that is pulling you down?
Are you physically well?
Hope your world looks better to you soon.
Hugs. (If you want them- some people don't)

Bear....EVERYONE can use hugs! :)

when i get in a funk i like to do a fun quick project that i can finish in a couple hours.

my new favorite is the origami purse.

http://www.quiltingboard.com/posts/list/16387.page


i changed the design slightly by adding in batting and quilting but the purse has the same shape. if you use batting you don't have to sew along the bottom corners to make the bag hold its shape - the batting alone helps hold the form.

I love hugs....a lot of physical..and emotional..and other things going on for the past couple of months...I'm not a depressive person usualy...but i've just been really down lately. I don't watch tv...and i have 4 small children, so going away is pretty much out of the question...quilting has been my release and my Me time..and now I don't even wanna do it! I either need a good swift kick to get out of this funk..or maybe some new fabric or anything quilting...I feel like pieces of me are missing right now :(

Maybe a vacation to an island in the Pacific? lol

hey, that sounds like a winner! you guys could go down to beach and Terri, you could get cooled off, and rid of that headache...me too, with heat, sometimes...and I'll babysit the four kiddies...no sugar, I promise, but lots and lots of games, and fun...go, you two, and have a ball! I won't even run the toilet over, while your gone, and will make sure, critters don't get in to steal stash, but I might hokey pokey with kids, right on in there, to have a look-see. Don't mind that it ain't all straight for company...other ppl's stuff, don't bother me, one bit...just my own :wink:

well, bug, hug, thin....ooops, big hug then... :wink:
yes, we all really do, get in this rut, sometimes...that's what it sounds like. You need a change of pace or scenery...some fresh air, etc.
Physical probs, cause emotional, and think you said cash flow is low...that'll do it fer sure!
Your feeling constricted...like I never go anywhere, by choice, but let car be unavailable to me...road-runner itch, hits!
i would 1 - not feel guilty about not quilting...just adds to
just be on hiatus from it, for a bit.
don't really know, what would put some sparkle back in your interests...so, go with what feels good, and let whatever you can, go...housework, etc.
I promise THAT won't go anywhere, lol!
Make a in house tent with kids, on living room floor and camp. Costs nothing, and they love it. They know when mommy doesn't feel right. Hope you feel more like yourself, very soon, Jamie. hugs agin :wink:

I'm going to head in right now, and start going through my fabric, I know I have a lot of scraps, and pieces I don't like, and some other ones I'm just sick of looking at, and maybe I can find someone who would like to exchange fabrics...plus where as I'm sick of spending half my day cleaning...I don't really consider this cleaning...It more wishful thinking :)
Thanks everyone It's nice to have someone to talk to and a bit of encouregment when your feeling down.

Hi Jamie---Sometimes I will go through a spell where I do not go into my quilt room for weeks at a time. The "bug", "urge", "creative juices"---whatever you want to call it-is just not there.

But, I do find if I will just go into the room and straighten my stash and/or refold fabric, maybe look through an old quilt magazine that it will lift my spirits. I still may not be in the mood to sew or create---but I will be feeling better.

I have a huge stash and would love to share. Tell me what kind of fabrics you like and let me "shop" for you at my house. Maybe I could send you a "squishy" with a few new-to-you fabrics that might get you enthusiastic about a new project.

How old are your 4 kids? Are they old enough for a sewing clinic with mom? There are lots of projects that even little kids can do too--maybe their creative juices will spark yours! :lol:

Thank you Marcia, your so sweet!! I don't have many "good" pieces of fabric...( actualy didn't realize just how short I was on fabric ) but I do have a LOT of scraps...maybe if you would like to trade for some I would love that.
I don't have a sewing room...I have a corner of my livingroom...so It's not even like I can go in there and lock myself up for a while.....all my quilting books and magazines were distroyed while I had the children loose in the house and I had my back turned...so I don't even have them right now to browse! :(
My kids are 10 ( he's just now starting to get his adhd under control enough that I might be able to teach him to sew ) 7...she is afraid of the sewing machine..4 and she wants nothing to do with it, and 1 yr old...and boy oh boy does he want to "Help" lol

Okay, Jamie---at least tell me your favorite color or a project you would like to make and let me pick some fabrics for you. PM me your address and I will send you a package this afternoon!!

Jamie another idea might be to use some of the kids clothes that they will no longer be able to wear to make a memory quilt. They are always fun and if you get more enjoyment out of them Goodwill will understand.

I don't have any family in the area either, and hubby works crazy hours, and when he gets home he just doesn't have the energy to help much! I don't drive, so I'm litteraly trapped in a house with 4 kids..all day long...
I only have maybe 7 or 8 pieces of fabric at the moment..but I do have a lot of scraps!! So maybe if you want to trade for some of those that would be great!

That would be a great idea, to make memory blankets out of grown out of clothes, but I donate all the clothes to those who are more in need then us...all the clothes we have at the moment are the ones we wear lol...I haven't saved anything..there are to many people out there who are going without...

It was hard just having three small children at home, so I can only imagine how taxing, stressful and tiresome it must be on you. Hang in there, Baby. If you go on the quilt blocks galore website, you can find many ideas. Let us know what you end up doing.

Jamie and Marcia, if more stash is needed, I have tons....uh, quite a bit that I could share. Just let me know and I'd be more than happy to get something out today. :D

Jaime, we have all been there, done that . I didn't quilt most of the winter... I think the weather got to me :? I like to cut my fabric outside and when I get "trapped" inside due to the weather UGH.. Add that to the fact you don't feel you have any pretties to create with makes it all that much harder :roll: PM me your address and I will send you a squishy. Squishies always make you smile :lol:
Sharon

You have your hands full with the ADHD child, financial downturn, four kids, and a hobby you don't want to do, along with all the other things going on in your life that you haven't told us. I have been where you are a number of times in my life (without the adhd situation), and I would like to share some of the things I have practiced to get out of the rut of depression.
I lived in the middle of a big city, without even the ability to afford a thrift store, four children, and a husband that went to work faithfully, but didn't like me or the kids very much. I think I was the loneliest because with all the population around me, there was no one that had the outlook on life that I possessed (before I started going back to church, that is). I considered the situation, and because of the children, I couldn't just give up ... sometimes, it seems as though "I MUST be all right - - I am STILL breathing!" (One must always look for the positive :D )
SOmetimes, I had to practice what I didn't feel like doing. I had worked in a nursing home and noticed that older people would starve to death because they didn't FEEL like eating - - deciding what HAS to be done and then DOING it, no matter how small and insignificant is better than sitting there and NEVER accomplishing something.
Everything you do that makes life better for your family deserves your personal celebration ... it is a matter of perspective - - you can look at the things you cannot do and think "I am a waste of time = depression" ... or, you can look at what you CAN do and be proud of everything you can accomplish.
It happened that when my first life lesson was going on, the BiCentennial occurred ... and I began to think about the things and people who made America the best, greatest nation in the world. In that thinking, I considered my forefathers and foremothers who lived out in the prairie with ONLY their family for company. None of the input that we have in today's world - - even back in the 70's we had radio and televison <g>.
And, yet ... those who came before us, enduring months of isolation within just their family units produced GOOD American citizens. Independent thinking citizens who continued to contribute to our nation's growth.
So, rather than look around me and think of how different I was from everyone else and being bitter because they wouldn't get on the bandwagon, I CHOSE (we ALWAYS have a choice) to PRETEND (I may not be creative, but I do have an imagination! :-o ) ... I chose to pretend that I lived in the late eighteen hundreds, out in the middle of nowhere ... If women had done it in centuries past, I surely could accomplish as much.
When it became very obvious that my first husband really didn't like us very much, I delved back into my historical perceptions and realized there were a LOT of single women who had raised GOOD American citizens ... If they could do it, then I knew it could be done .. I just needed to decide to do it ...
In other words, I selected role models for myself that showed me how to put one foot in front of the other. It helped that my mother had taught me what to do with children who are too healthy, intelligent, and capable to be kept safely playing on the floor. Put them to work! After all - - it is our responsibility to teach our children how to be independent ... it is never too early to teach them to contribute to the well-being of the family.
No, it is not easy to be lonely, depressed, stressed out over money issues, struggling with what kind of a woman you are going to become, and making sure that everyone who depends on you gets at least the basics of what they need. But generations of women have done it before us ... most of them very successfully ... we can ponder the failures or we can seek out the successful - - it really is our choice.
So, I pretended to be out in the prairie in the middle of nowhere with no one around but me to figure out what my family would do to get through to the next day.
Then, my grandpa taught me the FIVE MINUTE RULE.
I will get back with that when I come back in from changing watering systems.
Just consider this - - MILLIONS of women have gone through EXACTLY what you are dealing with WITHOUT having all the options you have ... if they could do it, so can you ... do not allow someone's "diagnosis" ever dictate what will happen next ... circumstances happen - - what YOU do during those times will define who you are and what you are capable of.
Many have never found out how capable they truly are because they don't believe that they are bigger than the circumstances .... and, sometimes, just surviving the moment is a grander success than lots of bucks, time, and energy. If you are still breathing, you still have life, and that means God is not done working in your life. If He isn't giving up on you ... don't you be giving up on yourself.
I know these are cliches ... people say them without even thinking ... but I personally have experienced all I am sharing with you ... and some things you just have to have someone say over and over and over again until they become real to you .... it is what you are telling yourself about anything that will change life and living ... make sure the input you are feeding on is constructive and not debilitating.

I've been going through a lot I'm usualy so good at handeling everything, but i think i hit that last straw....( still going through a divorce and coustody...he got arrested for child pornography..and is still trying to fight me for more coustody ) that has been costing a fortune, and it's over 2 years of this now...I want to re-marry my "hubby" who i've been with for years ( but i don't even have my divorce yet )..he is going through some bad health..hospital stays, countless tests, doc visits 4 times a month...expensive meds, ...then I have my 4 kids...my oldests adhd and the price of his meds, but it was so out of hand that the school kept calling children a youth services because of his behavore..Finaly get that under control with a new medicine, and the school straightend out, I have to take my girls to therapy every week, because we need to make sure that my child pedifile of an ex husband didn't "hurt my girls"...I don't drive, so i'm going nuts trapped in a house, it's hard trying to take care of everything yourself...and now I found a lump above my breast...and i'm sorta scared about that, and conserned because I've put it off for so long since I didn't have the money to go to the doctors myself...plus there gonna have to biopsy it, and insurance doesn't cover everything...and to top that off, the transmission in our mini van is going...and hubby is a machanic we can afford to put the money into it right now to fix it...so my hobbies and myself has been suffering, and put on the back burner! and I'm sorry for venting, and airing all my problems here.. but you guys are so sweet..and carying, i thought it would be okay!:) Thank you so much everyone for your kindness....

It is OK that is what friends are for. You sure do have your plate full. Charity begins at home. If you need to cut up some of those old things to make you feel better then you do it. You are no good to anyone if you do not take care of yourself. That goes for the lump thing too. You have to make yourself number one cause look how many people depend on you. Ignoring it and hoping it goes away will not help any of them. There are ways to get to and from if the car dies but no one can replace YOU!!!!! Get to the Dr!!!!!

Jamie, one of the greatest beauties of this board is that the people truly care. I have been so touched by what some of the people have said and done for others. Some will give advice and others will give you a shoulder -- and both are necessary.

I was serious about sending some stash. It looks like a few of us would love to send you something to make you smile, so let us. :D If you pm me your address, I'll get some goodies out to you.

Rebecca

WOW! Just read your response to my (or shortly after) input.
That is a lot of stress going on in your home.
Might I suggest, if your doctor didn't, that you cut out all caffeine until after the biopsy, etc. I found a lump in my breast, decided to go to DR, tried to aspirate the lump that had grown from the size of my pinky fingernail in a week to the size of my first joint of my thumb ... could'nt be aspirated, so go to have a mammogram. Just as I am leaving DR office to go get mammogram, he suggested going "no caffeine" for the next week ... showed up the next week for biopsy, and happened to mention that where the lump had been hard, it was now mushy around the edges. Quite a trip to have DR reach over and grab the lump, squish it around and say, "It sure has changed, hasn't it? Guess I had better check the mammogram." Bottom line ... knocking the caffeine off for that week changed the lump and the mammogram showed that I didn't have any reason to have a biopsy.
All I drank for a week was water and 7-up ... of course, <g> I ate, but the no caffeine solution were those two items.
As a matter of fact, a lot of problems we face have a lot to do with a physical problem we don't even know about. I am not a naturopath, by any means, but it just makes sense to up your amount of water input, since that is about the fastest, safest way I know of to flush your system ... the solution to pollution is dilution.
If it works for the environment, it should work in our bodies.

I spend a lot of time doing Pollyanna/Scarlett O'Hara thinking.
Pollyanna always looked at a situation and tried to find the better/good side of it.
Scarlett O'Hara's most famous, life changing line was: I can't think about that now. I will think about it TOMORROW.

If you look at everything going on in your life right now ... either philosophy is a pointless exercise of futilization. However, if you take your list of problems waiting for solutions, and approach them one by one, the task becomes a bit more manageable.
Frankly, I don't know how you can find any peace until you find a higher power than yourself to trust.
Could you possibly be beating yourself up more than life is? When getting banged over the head with some of your problems and piling on by berating yourself for "poor" choices in the past, it is pretty hard to not feeling overwhelmed.

No caffine!! Sorry wouldn't make it through the morning...I am cutting back, and adding more water though...I'm a bit of a coffee snob! It's an all day thing for me..even have a cup before bed...But i did decide in the mean time to cut back, and flush things out. Summer vacation for the kids starts next week..and I just can't survive without some coffee..:)

I don't generaly beat myself up over anything...but I also don't have anyone I can really talk to...all my friends tend to talk more than listen..and "hubby" works full time, goes to school full time, and has countless health issues right now himself...he doesn't have the time or energy to listen....I'm use to being the fondation and taking care of everything..I think just not having been able to get anything out into the open and talked about is just weighing on me to hard.

LOL ... trust me! I know coffee cups and coffee from am to pm and beyond!
Cutting back is good. And, the more water you drink, the more you will enjoy it. Just think of your coffee drinking as a habit (I always have a solution <g>) ... the process is, pouring, sitting down, picking up cup, taking a sip, setting the cup down ... pour a pitcher of water, and pour from the frig instead of the maker. If it will help :idea: put the coffee maker in the frig. ( just a thought :wink: )
Hey! You aren't going to believe this, but when I was working over Idaho way, I ran into a family who had an ADHD kiddo - - they didn't call it that, then (obviously) ... anyway, they would give the boy a cup of coffee in the morning, in the afternoon, and at night ... it really did calm him down. I was skeptical, to say the least, but sometimes, what doesn't seem to make sense is exactly what will work - - some of us are wired differently ... it's summer, mom, could it possibly hurt to share some of your coffee once in awhile??? :lol:

ahhhh .... it is hard to resign as master of the universe, eh?
Have you ever heard this one?
Of course, I talk to myself! I am the ONLY one around here who makes any sense!
(yes, I have spent a lot of time talking to myself <g>) Believe me when I tell you that nothing I suggest hasn't been used in my life ... I use it ALL!

It's no wonder you're having a hard time getting to the sewing room with all this stuff going on!

My suggestion is to walk every day. It really does help with calming down the body and the mind. The hardest thing about it, for me anyway, is actually getting up and starting to walk. Afterwards I am always glad I did it. If I walk long enough (usually an hour), I sleep much better during the night and wake up feeling better.

If there's someone who would walk with you regularly, that can make it easier to actually get out and do it every day.

Walking is a good idea.
I was thinking about how to explain do the "little things" ... because the little things add up to bigger things ... and the walking idea is terrific!
Won't your kids think you are something else when you walk with them around the block three or four times a day?

I watch the Dog Whisperer, and there is a lot of what he teaches that is almost universal among animals and humans, just on different levels.
He runs into dogs from time to time, that are just frozen in the "off" position. They do all kinds of bad things to express their frustration over life and living, but things change when you can take them out for a walk.
And, some of them just have to be encouraged to take the FIRST step ...
For us humans, we get so focused on everything going on around us that is beyond our control, we get frozen, too ... It is like we are so busy looking at our feet we can't see anything going on three feet in any direction of ourselves.
Taking a walk a couple times a day (even if it is just around the block) changes our perspective, and how we look at things around us.
It also helps break us out of the rut.

The Five Minute Rule

Sometimes, we just have to be free to FEEL exactly what we want to feel and how we want to feel it.
Pity party, sadness, anger, emotion of any kind. God built us with emotions, so He obviously has a use for them. Part of which may very well be to understand empathy ...

The five minute rule is this: You get to feel whatever you want to feel for five minutes, just exactly the way you want to feel it, as long as you do no damage to anyone else while feeling it. Go ahead, feel sorry for yourself, beat yourself up, explain to yourself how you alone are responsible for the starving people of Ethiopia, or spend time explaining to God, why He is not being very fair with all this stuff.

But, ONLY for FIVE minutes.
At the end of five minutes, you have GOT to get up and go do something constructive, usually for someone else.

The secret to the whole process is limiting the amount of time you absolutely give in to whatever you are feeling, and then GETTING UP and going to do something different.

Practice those two steps and your outlook on life changes.

And, you may do this twice every hour or every fifteen minutes ... then, I would caution yourself to only allow yourself to go there once an hour, or ONLY after you have completed a task .... washing a load of clothes, loading the dryer, folding the clean clothes, and putting them away, and THEN you get to go on an emotional roller coaster for five minutes.

The point is: You control your emotions ... do not allow them to control you.
Our basic human self is not very good for our well-being ... we seem to work overtime to defeat and demoralize ourselves.
The only thing I have found that makes the outcome different is to do something constructive ...

Thank you guys so much!! Really...I sat here and cryed my eyes out for a good 30 min, then with the tears and all of your kindness I started to feel better.....I don't really have much time for self pity....and I am a very active person...actualy I am trying desperatly to Gain some weight right now ( Yes thats right gain ) I have a high thyroid which makes keeping weight impossible, and I end up a 93 lb stick! But I do walk...actualy just the amount of times I go up and downstairs in a single day is more excersice then most people need in a week lol
I've always kept a very positive attitude, and I am always there to help everyone and anyone around me who is in need...I just have Never taken that help before. Actualy I don't really know how to except gifts and kindness from others, since I'm usualy the one giving..But none the less...Thank you all so very much!!! I think maybe with a truck load of chocolate, and some new projects to work on I will feel better in no time :)))

Hi Jamie,

I hope you feel better soon. In case nobody has mentioned it already, see if you can find someone to swap fabric with you and get some library books on something new about quilting and go wild with it.

Good luck

I have been gone all afternoon doing a Gazebo Bash at the Post (that is a yard sale with attitude <g>) .. just got online and found your post.
Good job!
Sometimes, we think: If I were a more capable person, I would never cry, I would never feel one way or the other, I would always know all of the answers. If I really were a woman fully growed, I would never have to ask for help from anyone, not even my mom and dad!

I remember working the coffee counter at the restaurant one morning in my hometown. I was standing off to the side while the men talked to each other. Most of them, I had gone to school with. I don't remember exactly what was said, but I had a light bulb moment - - I was almost thirty years old and life was not going the way I thought it should.
I could definitely point to some mistakes I had made along the way (I think I have only been innocent three times in my life - - most of my damage has been done by me to me, so!)
I am standing at the waitress station, thinking about this phenomenon, and then I realized what was happening.
I had just discovered a truthful fact of life!
For some reason, I thought that when I graduated from high school, I would know exactly what to do every step of the way. Somewhere, I had gotten the notion that by the time I was thirty, I would have no more questions, and the reality was - - I had LOTS of questions!
Everything about life and living was one big question ...
and the lesson was: the questions are part of life and living. We will NEVER be old enough to know everything, we will always do a lot of personal introspection.
The thing that makes life so exciting is the same thing that makes life so difficult ... crossroads - - every decision is made at a crossroad.
Or, how about this? Did you figure you should always have a reason for everything you ever did in your life? I NEVER wanted to tell my children - - Because I TOLD you!
reality? I finally had to say "Because I TOLD you!" (The neighbors were starting to talk about what it meant to have me telling my kids "Of course, you can - - your eyes are brown." Or, "Your eyes are brown. You cannot do it!")
The point is: sometimes, our expectations of life are different from reality.
It doesn't matter who is to blame for how we got to where we are ... we only have one person we can truly control and account for - - and, the wonderful thing is: God doesn't expect YOU to account for MY actions ... it really is between just you and God.

I am sorry that you had to cry, but I am so glad that you gave yourself permission to just feel whatever it was you wanted to feel.
Okay, so it was a bit longer than five minutes, but the amount of time isn't the key, Jaime ... the key is to make sure that you know when to let it start and when to make it stop ... as long as you drink enough water, you will always be able to cry if that is what you are feeling <g> ...
But, you did good ...
Is it time for the other part of the five minute rule??? LOL

When my mom and dad were first married, she had a horse accident that left her comatose for three days.
Her concussion was so bad that for many weeks, the folks had to live with his parents.
As it turned out, Dad's family did a lot to help their eldest son make a go in a number of things, babysitting grandchildren, having family dinners, and my mother asked Grandmother one day, "How can I ever pay you back for all you have done?"
My Grandmother said, "You can't. But, one day you will be able to help someone else, and I would expect that you would remember how you received help and reach out to help someone else."

Kapiche? <g>

So true.. pay it forward...Maybe someday you will be able to help someone else out and that is what this is all about :lol:
Sharon

Jamie, I am so sorry to hear about you feeling down!! I hope that you will consult with your doctor to hopefully find out the cause of this.

Just a suggestion but try exorcising if you don't already. That sometimes helps.

I sent you a PM.

Kyia

I got to thinking about this, and I think it's very important that you get your medical problems taken care of immediately. If you don't protect your health, you will be unable to protect your children.

If I am understanding correctly, you have a hyper-active thyroid that is not completely under control with medication and a lump that has not been biopsied. As I see it, lack of money should not be a reason to postpone taking care of these medical issues. Especially in these times, doctors and hospitals are willing to extend very reasonable payment plans. Even if you end up in bankruptcy because of medical bills, your children will be better off with you alive and healthy.

Hyper-thyroidism that is not controlled can undermine your health and make any other illness harder to get over. The lump may just be a cyst, but the mental stress of wondering about it adds to the other unavoidable stresses you have had to endure. If it's worse than a cyst, early treatment is much more successful than late treatment.

Consider who is going to get custody of your children if something happens to you! To protect your children, you really need to take care of your health issues now.

that is cute, I'm going to try it!