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My daughter lost her first child as a full term still birth. All she ever wanted was to be a Mom. We never know until we are in that position how any act of kindness helps. There are children still born and miscarriages at our hospitals all the time. Call the hospital to see if you can make quilts for these devasted Moms.
My daughter is going through a terrible divorce after 20 years with 3 teenage children. No home 2 part time jobs. She is determined to make it on her own as she was the one to leave. I am making her a kisses and hugs quilt. Her whole persona on life is in the depths of hell. Maybe I can get through to her with my quilt. I won't care if she love it ,cuts it up or runs over it with her car. I know in the end she will remember my love in her sorrow. |
Oh Wow, I can't believe your daughter would say that. My kids all have several quilts each and love them. I know they would accept more if I give them to them, happily. Anyway, most of the quilts I make don't have a home. I agree with everyone else, its something you enjoy, consider it your therapy. I just love to quilt and sew almost every day. I belong to 3 quilt guilds and we all make and donate quilts to different organizations, battered women shelters, hospitals, etc. You can always find organizations that will be so grateful for your work. We have a huge collection of thank you notes from people/organizations that will bring tears to your eyes. We just don't realize how easy we have it. Having your own quilt is quite a luxury for some people that don't have anything, kids especially. They are the ones who will truly treasure a quilt to call their own. Keep on quilting!
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Your DD needs a spanking even if she is too old for one!!! Who made her the quilt police???? Everyone needs a quilt so keep rolling em out honey and enjoy it....
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When asked who I was making a quilt for I answered "ME". As far as who will get it after its finished--I don't know. I'll enjoy it for a while and then give it away for sell it. Like you, my pleasure is in the making, seeing it come together and knowing I did it. If it is hard for you to part with your quilts just remember, someone you don't know and will never meet is wrapped in the love you created. I can see your daughter hurt you by her comment but I'm hoping it wasn't meant that way. Tell her what you told us, I hope she hugs you and says I didn't mean it that way. Meanwhile, finish that American Jane baby quilt-I love that fabric-and then start on the next one. We can't always explain the things that make us happy and content.
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I love this idea!!
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the small quilting guild that I did belong to, asked for quilts to be given to the local police department and the fire dept., to be given to accident victins and others needing encouragement. Might be a thing that your local depts, might need. So keep on quilting and enjoying yourself. mary
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What about donating to women's shelter? the child's charity thing that I can't remember the name of? Nursing home patients love lap quilts? Some of the police/fire departments can use them for a child that has been in a traumatic situation? Keep doing what you love. If you look, you can find someone that could use a quilt.
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It is your life, and you only live once. Please don't listen to your daughter, if you enjoy quilting, you should keep doing it.
You can always donate some of the quilts you made to be auctioned off for charity. Of sell them on Ebay. A quilting mind is a busy mind, which keeps you healthy and alert. You go girl. June |
Don't ever give up what you love or what makes you happy! Life is way to short...we never know what 2marrow will bring. I don't think any one would not like something made from the heart like a quilt. There are hundreds of places for donations call any church or fire dept. There is always a need.
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If you build it THEY WILL COME! They could also be sold at quilt shows, thus financing future projects. It's good to have gifts at the ready when the occasion arises.
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Originally Posted by nuttyhurricane
You are truely gifted. What about Project Linus? They sent a ton of light weight quilts to Haiti (sp?? please forgive). They also supply quilts to the childrens section of hospitals. Then there are the hospic, chemo, and foster children. Just start thinking out side of the box. Project Linus is on line. You can find a group that way. For the other two mentioned talk to some one at the hospital or try a few churches. Someone is always going through some hard time and could use one. Don't let this gift slide away. Also if you were not quilting what else would you do for theraphy? K
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Don't stop quilting. I didn't have an ongoing hobby when I was a child and I recall my Dad telling me often that I needed to develop a hobby. He is gone (over 30 years ago) and only a few years ago did I finally begin quilting. And the reason I wanted to learn to quilt was because I remembered the quilts my grandmother made and gave to us. Nothing fancy but they sure kept us warm. The quilts you make today can be the source of someone else developing quilting as a hobby ... continue to quilt and share your love of the craft with others. And share some photos with us on this board who are inspired by the beautiful work of quilters like you.
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I disagree with your daughter also. I also love to quilt - just for the sake of quilting. Your quilts are not useless, or most likely ugly, they are works from your heart, which in my view makes them valuable. Did you ever think of giving them to charitable institutions, for raffles. I make quilts and donate to worthy charities, they really make a lot of money! I am self taught on sewing and quilting - so they are not fancy, but I think they are beautiful, and apparently so do all the people that buy raffle tickets.
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Originally Posted by IrishNY
If you don't mind me saying... it's none of your daughter's damn business. There, I said it.
Unless you are asking her to pay for your materials, or you are paying for materials but she has to pay your mortgage or buy your food, you don't need to justify, or explain, or make excuses, or feel bad. Your life, your choices. Tell her I said so. :P |
Originally Posted by carhop
Originally Posted by mom-6
If one of MY kids said that, I'd know they felt like I was spending money that they were too (fill in whatever word fits) to come right out and ask me for, but feel like I should be giving them...and for no other reason than they want to spend it on something they want but don't have the $$$ for at the moment and they don't want to wait till they have enough saved up to get.
I've been very generous to my kids and they've come to take it for granted, but now I'm retiring and my funds will be more limited and they are just going to have to deal with it! And they do at least partially understand my need to quilt and do other crafts, because I've been doing some sort of craft (not necessarily quilting) all their lives. |
check around at local churchs, I make lap/baby quilts and shawls for my churchs prayer shawl group. Or go to a nursing home and ask the staff if there are people there that dont have anyone. Go visit them and gift them with a quilt. There are so many people out in the world that are lonely and need someone to care for them.
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Originally Posted by dljennings
Originally Posted by IrishNY
If you don't mind me saying... it's none of your daughter's damn business. There, I said it.
Unless you are asking her to pay for your materials, or you are paying for materials but she has to pay your mortgage or buy your food, you don't need to justify, or explain, or make excuses, or feel bad. Your life, your choices. Tell her I said so. :P |
Alright I say~ great response and I agree whole heartedly!!
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Don't let what your kids say discourage you...Quilt away...Xmas is coming and you can donate to the Fire Department to give to victims of abuse or fire...our guild does and it is so rewarding..
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If you've got quilts all over the house and all your friends & family have your quilts and you love making quilts, then what the heck! If your daughter thinks you're wasting time and money and she won't know what to do with them after you're gone, then have her read this string of suggestions.
That child's quilt you're working on--believe me, there is a child out there that will love your quilt when you've finished! Someone is missing the boat--not you tho. I know it's hard to enjoy doing something when not even friends get why you do what you love to do. It gets kinda lonely. I'm with you and support your passion for quilting.! |
Originally Posted by feline fanatic
First of all please explain to your DD and BFF that it brings you pleasure and therefore is not a waste of time. If she still doesn't get it, maybe explain in terms of food. We prefer to eat stuff that we like the flavor of. Otherwise we would just eat for only sustenance. Does this make sense? If eating certain things simply bring us pleasure as well as nutrition, well then, why aren't we all eating gruel with tofu (or something equally void of flavor but nutritious) for every meal? If a thing brings us pleasure or a measure of happiness it is NOT, IMHO a waste of time (nor money).
Quilting is my passion as well and I would not give it up because someone, even someone I loved dearly, thought it was a waste of time and money. Something that brings pleasure, contentment, a sense of self worth and accomplishment does indeed have value and is not a waste of time. As far as there being a "glut" of quilts in the charity market, I sincerely doubt this. There are calls everywhere for quilt donations. Quilts for Kids, Quilts of Valor, our very own Green Fairy collects quilts every year for orphans in Romania and all it takes is a look at her blog to see how much they are needed and appreciated. Homeless shelters, Churches, Guilds, Women's shelters and countless other organizations can all attest to there being a need. You can also give quilts to friends. |
I have tons of quilts. I just love to sew, pick out the colors, patterns, piece and quilt. It is my favorite thing to do. I give very few away. I chose what I like to do and I keep them because I love them. I do sew for charity, but when I start I know that the quilt will be going there and don't hold on. I'm not sure how old your daughter is, but as she gets older she will probably appreciate them more. Usually grandchildren will love anything you make. Find a quilt Guild. They all know someone who needs quilts. But maybe you need them more. Just love them.
Verna in So Cal |
I also have to say I agree, youir daughter just doesn't "get it" although I understand where you are both comming from.
I make and give most of mine away. Because I love quilting I make small quilts and donate them to charity organizations and in recent times I decided to make a larger quilt and have donated this to be used as a raffle prize to raise money for the cancer association. I make them because I love doing so. While I haven't found the need to do so at this time I would try selling them for a reasonable price to cover the cost of materials if I thought it was becoming an issue having them piling up in my store room. |
Jfowles,
I give away most of my quilts to 2 local charities and I still get to make quilts. With my guild there is "Baby Bundles" , those quilts go to the county health department and they give them to poor women who complete prenatal care and parenting classes after the baby is born. "The Linus Connection" is the other one, all of the quilts stay in central Texas and go to in-need children. http://www.linusconnection.org/ |
Originally Posted by MaggieLou
You could donate them to a hospice. They always appreciate quilts and the family has something to remember their loved one with.
when she passed away, my aunt got that quilt. she also has take great comfort from it... i made 4 (so far) and mailed them in grammy's memory.. so you can always find someone who needs the comfort that a quilt keeps on giving. |
I would donate the childs quilt to Quilts For Kids. They are very sicl kids in the hospital that would love your quilts. Go to www.Quiltsforkids.org.
I know what you mean about the love of quilting, I', the same way. I buy fabric just because I like it. Quilting for the kids gives me pleasure as well as doing what I love. The foundation supplies the fabric...pre cut as well! All you do is give of your time and supply the batting. |
U could donate ur quilts to different groups to auction off or raffle...u could just give to women who have lost their children or husbands in some tradgety. u could just go to the library, pick out a deserving person and just offer them a quilt....don't stop making them, they r such incredable gifts. for those who make them and those who get them!!!! that is pretty cool stuff! and u r pretty cool too! don't forget that. plus, keep ur daughter out of ur sewing room :) outa site, outa mind.
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Are you kidding!!! Do you know how many kids or seniors that would love to recieve a quilt. Why not donate your works of art to your local hospitals or seniors homes. Then you can pass down the most precious thing you enjoy doing.
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Your might remind your DD/BFF that quilting keeps you "young" ... studies show that keeping active keeps the mind alert and less apt to get dimentia (sp?). Quilting requires thought, concentration, math, money calculations, artistic talents, reading & decifering patterns, it keeps your hands busy with something that you love. Don't stop! If money is a concern keep your receips for supplies and then use that as a tax deduction when you donate a quilt to a cause.
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You have a gift to quilt, and weather it is for family friends or donations, you were giving that gift, I don't agree with your daughter at all, and you are not selfish, I was given a quilt as a birthday gift from a member of this board, this is my first quilt and I will cherish it for the rest of my life. so you continue making your quilts and donate them if you have to, but do it with the joy that someone even a stranger will love and cherish your gift. God bless. Penny
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Just let your daughter know this is YOUR HOBBY and you enjoy it. There are many other addictions that cost money but there is no lovely return like a quilt. Like other people said, if she doesn't get it so what!!! It is YOUR life and YOUR enjoyment and that is all that counts. I have made quilts for family members and just make quilts because I like them. If my children didn't like it so be it. I could be gambling, drinking, doing drugs or be the town whore. Our hobby is one of the best. People knit, crochet, scrap book and rubber stamp and these hobbies cost money too. Just tell her I love to quilt and I'm going to continue. Take the suggestions of donating and leaving instructions on what to do with your quilts once you are gone. There are many many charities that would love to have them.
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I have tons of quilts not made by me. my mil was a quilter and made quilts for all my kids and my husband and me. We also have her quilts and antique quilts passed down thru family. i don't "need" to quilt but I want to make quilts. It is my mental therapy. I find joy in completing a quilt as well as during the designing and finding fabric. There are many who would love to have your quilts. Keep quilting.
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everyone that replied to you is absolutely right..so i wont repeat..please please do not stop quilting or feeling guilty..there are hundreds of women out there that would love to be in your shoes..
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Your daughter just doesn't have any interest in what you do, so she doesn't understand your intense interest and love of quilting, but when she gets older she will. just keep up your quilting, someone will appreciate them! i sew, i love to sew, just about anything, my grandchildren just keep thinking of more and more things for me to make, especially blankets! i need to tell you a story, a child very young and very very close to me, we thought was being molested, so we took her to the doctors to be examined, it was very traumatic for her and us, the nurse came out with a QUILT, it wasn't fancy, it didn't have child pictures on, actually it was kind of plain, she gave it to this child, and the child held on to it during the exam. believe it or not this child still has and sleeps with this quilt, 9 years later. so please keep sewing, and i know for a fact that the elderly would like them too!!!!!! Kathy
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Keep on quilting, you deserve to have something you enjoy to do. A suggestion as to what to do with your quilts, I donate some of mine to the volenteers at the Cancer Hosp. and they can sell or raffle them to raise money for progams at the hospital. Or donate them to any local service groups for fundraising. Just don't give up on your love of quilting.
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I agree - your daughter just doesn't understand what quilting means to you. My Mom has said something similar to me - she's "inundated" with quilts and doesn't want any more. I've made her one lap quilt, a kitty wall-hanging and a Christmas wallhanging. So, I've just crossed her off my list of receipients and continue to make quilts and give them to Project Linus, Wounded Warrior program, as donations for local causes silent auctions, for people I know will appreciate them, and for myself and DH as well. It's a wonderful hobby and one that makes you happy and satisfied - KEEP ON QUILTING!!
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My daughter doesn't get it either, I just ignore it. The irony is that her 13 yr old daughter gets it.
I also have started making quilts for charity, I am on my third one for Jan (someone gave the link earlier) , she is collecting quilt tops or finsihed quilts for the military in Afghanistan, lets me do what I like and I hope it makes a difference to some one. I don't think my quilts are show worthy by any means but they are made with love. |
Originally Posted by jfowles
So, I love quilting, dah!! it doesn't matter if I have someone to give it to, if I need it or even like it very much I just love quilting. My daughter who is my best friend and a wonderful friend at that, told me the other day, (at least this is what I heard) that it was all kind of a waste, I don't have anymore people to give them to and what is she going to do with them when I am gone. I have too many to display and they aren't good enough to give as works of art (my thoughts). So now I am working on a child's quilt with no one to give it to. I bought the expensive fabric that was made for the pattern (American Jane) and I just feel stupid working on something just to be quilting. I have no idea what to do with it but it has been so so expensive to make that I want it to go to someone who will appreciate it. I told her I can donate them but she seemed to think there is an over abundance of quilts and no one really wants them. I make her sound like an ogre and she really isn't, she just doesn't get it, Anyway now I feel bad about all the money and time I have spent just to appease my addiction when no one has any use for my work. I may not finish the child's quilt and just move on to something I intend to use as a gift, I think the intended recipient will appreciate it but now I am rethinking the whole idea of quilting as just plan selfish and self serving. So I've rambled on a long time with this, I just feel bad and I need some moral support to justify my need to continue what I love.
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Keep on Quilting. Enjoy your hobby. I am sure your daughter has something that she really enjoys doing. or some type of hobby. Do you have other children who might enjoy more quilts. I was thinking of the post about Jan in Va. and her request for quilts for our service personnel Also there is always a need for bedding with people who lose their homes to floods, fires, or other natural disasters. Homeless shelters, etc. Hospitals with SPECIALITY CLINICS can use quilts. Our local hospital hs a unit for dialysis and they can always use quilts, they must be unused however. How about St. Jude's or some hospital with cancer patients. Don't give up your love of quilting, because your daughter thinks there isn't anyone else who would want our quilts. Any of us on the board would love them. I really like the idea of a quilt garage sale or something like that . Donate to your local Sr. Citizens group for a raffle for something they need. There are so many things you could do with them.
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I't saddens me to read your story, what I would give to see my mom one more time quilting, knowing how much she enjoyed it. I think if you are not neglecting other things that are important and your not asking your daughter for money, then go for it. You keep doing what you enjoy. And if you need someone to send a quilt or two too, I have a son and a daughter, who would love them. Lord Bless You!!!
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