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Thread: HELP and Encouragement

  1. #1
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    So, I love quilting, dah!! it doesn't matter if I have someone to give it to, if I need it or even like it very much I just love quilting. My daughter who is my best friend and a wonderful friend at that, told me the other day, (at least this is what I heard) that it was all kind of a waste, I don't have anymore people to give them to and what is she going to do with them when I am gone. I have too many to display and they aren't good enough to give as works of art (my thoughts). So now I am working on a child's quilt with no one to give it to. I bought the expensive fabric that was made for the pattern (American Jane) and I just feel stupid working on something just to be quilting. I have no idea what to do with it but it has been so so expensive to make that I want it to go to someone who will appreciate it. I told her I can donate them but she seemed to think there is an over abundance of quilts and no one really wants them. I make her sound like an ogre and she really isn't, she just doesn't get it, Anyway now I feel bad about all the money and time I have spent just to appease my addiction when no one has any use for my work. I may not finish the child's quilt and just move on to something I intend to use as a gift, I think the intended recipient will appreciate it but now I am rethinking the whole idea of quilting as just plan selfish and self serving. So I've rambled on a long time with this, I just feel bad and I need some moral support to justify my need to continue what I love.

  2. #2
    Power Poster sueisallaboutquilts's Avatar
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    Oh my, I really disagree with your daughter!
    And I disagree with you about being selfish, self-serving etc.
    You are SUPPOSED to love what you are doing!!
    That's the point, isn't it???
    I don't get her logic at all, sorry!!

    Keep doing what you love!!!!!!! :D

  3. #3
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    You're right, she doesn't get it. There are plenty of folks who love quilts and would take them or buy them even if she wouldn't.

    Why not have a quilt garage sale and recoup some money on the onew you've made...at least get enough money to buy more fabric even if you don't get paid for your time. or check out the non-profits in town - they frequently need items for fund-raisers and quilts are always a big hit in that area.

    If you do what you love, those who love you will love what you do, so don't give up now. (and that wasn't meant as a slam at your daughter....but there are others out there. Chin up and keep that machine operating! Remember that you're not just feeding your addiction, you're keeping the economy moving as well.

  4. #4
    Super Member noveltyjunkie's Avatar
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    It sounds like there is more to this story than you are sharing here. Unless your quilting habit is getting you into debt, causing you to neglect your friends, skip meals, or filling up your house to an unreasonable degree, I'd keep right on!

  5. #5
    Super Member donnajean's Avatar
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    Ignore your daughter. I have many quilts as well with no one in mind & no relatives to give them to. Someday you find someone who will appreciate them. When my sister lost her battle with colon cancer, we gave some the the local hospice. Just give your daughter instructions to donate them & not throw them out.

  6. #6
    Junior Member nuttyhurricane's Avatar
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    You are truely gifted. What about Project Linus? They sent a ton of light weight quilts to Haiti (sp?? please forgive). They also supply quilts to the childrens section of hospitals. Then there are the hospic, chemo, and foster children. Just start thinking out side of the box. Project Linus is on line. You can find a group that way. For the other two mentioned talk to some one at the hospital or try a few churches. Someone is always going through some hard time and could use one. Don't let this gift slide away. Also if you were not quilting what else would you do for theraphy? K

  7. #7
    Super Member noveltyjunkie's Avatar
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    Oops. When I post from my phone, pressing return causes the message to submit.......

  8. #8
    Bottle Blonde's Avatar
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    I'm sending a message of encouragement by the boatload!!!! Everyone needs a creative outlet, a hobby, a way to spend spare time..... so many people enjoy tv - I think it is a waste of time - some men golf and/or hunt - I don't enjoy that - lots of folks like to run - I really don't get that! - some people cook and bake - I don't like to cook, but love to eat! :D some people spend time at bars - that is more expensive that quilting! my DH likes to ride his motorcycle - I'll go sometimes....My point is this - if you enjoy it, do it! Why not?!!! It is your money - your time - YOUR HOBBY - are you hurting anyone by quilting? NO, of course not. Would you be unhappy if you stopped quilting? SOOOO .... quilt and be happy!

  9. #9
    Super Member feline fanatic's Avatar
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    First of all please explain to your DD and BFF that it brings you pleasure and therefore is not a waste of time. If she still doesn't get it, maybe explain in terms of food. We prefer to eat stuff that we like the flavor of. Otherwise we would just eat for only sustenance. Does this make sense? If eating certain things simply bring us pleasure as well as nutrition, well then, why aren't we all eating gruel with tofu (or something equally void of flavor but nutritious) for every meal? If a thing brings us pleasure or a measure of happiness it is NOT, IMHO a waste of time (nor money).

    Quilting is my passion as well and I would not give it up because someone, even someone I loved dearly, thought it was a waste of time and money. Something that brings pleasure, contentment, a sense of self worth and accomplishment does indeed have value and is not a waste of time.

    As far as there being a "glut" of quilts in the charity market, I sincerely doubt this. There are calls everywhere for quilt donations. Quilts for Kids, Quilts of Valor, our very own Green Fairy collects quilts every year for orphans in Romania and all it takes is a look at her blog to see how much they are needed and appreciated. Homeless shelters, Churches, Guilds, Women's shelters and countless other organizations can all attest to there being a need. You can also give quilts to friends.

  10. #10
    Super Member noveltyjunkie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ktbb


    If you do what you love, those who love you will love what you do,
    I don't think this is realistic at all. Some of my husband's hobbies bug me, but I can see they give him pleasure so I keep silent. Just because he gets excited about stripping old engines does not require me to do the same!

  11. #11
    Super Member Charlee's Avatar
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    You need to quilt. It's your outlet. It's necessary to your mental well being. Just because your daughter doesn't want your quilts now, doesn't mean she won't want them later, when you can either no longer make them or are gone.
    The others have valid suggestions. Quilts 4 Kids, Project Linus, Quilts of Valor would ALL appreciate your donations...and so would *I*!! :lol: That's it...just send those quilts to me...I will love them and take good care of them, and I don't care how many there are! ;) :)

  12. #12
    Super Member Joan's Avatar
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    Your daughter truly doesn't get it at all. Don't let her discourage her.

    You LOVE to quilt......reading between the lines, it is just so obvious.

    I for one give most of my quilts away and when I run out of relatives, special organizations will get my quilts.

    Just remembered if you are covered with a hand made quilt, you are covered with LOVE and I can think of a lot of people in the world who need a little love in their life.

    Keep sewing! Please!

  13. #13
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    Here is another option for someone right here on the board. A woman, Jan, asked for quilts for her SIL in Afghanistan and other soldiers there. Here is the link, with dimensions, etc. They are extremely pleased to receive them.

    http://www.quiltingboard.com/t-67645-1.htm

  14. #14
    Senior Member Boopers's Avatar
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    Check to see if there are any group homes in your area. These young adults love to receive things like quilts.
    Check with your local fire dept. See if they will accept quilts to give to fire or accident survivors. There are a lot of people out there who would love to know that someone cares. DON'T GIVE UP what you love to do.

  15. #15
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    Quote Originally Posted by noveltyjunkie
    It sounds like there is more to this story than you are sharing here. Unless your quilting habit is getting you into debt, causing you to neglect your friends, skip meals, or filling up your house to an unreasonable degree, I'd keep right on!
    If this is the case, cut back and take care of what needs to be taken care of.

    If it's just that your daughter does not get it - then continue on - I don't get Playing Golf - but my DH seems to enjoy it -

    I definitely don't get smoking and recreational drugs.

    Yes, quilting can be a VERY expensive pastime/hobby - but if you can afford it, why not?

    Last time I looked, it's still a legal activity (in spite of rumors of "the quilt police")

  16. #16
    Senior Member blzzrdqueen's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by jfowles
    So, I love quilting, dah!! it doesn't matter if I have someone to give it to, if I need it or even like it very much I just love quilting. My daughter who is my best friend and a wonderful friend at that, told me the other day, (at least this is what I heard) that it was all kind of a waste, I don't have anymore people to give them to and what is she going to do with them when I am gone. I have too many to display and they aren't good enough to give as works of art (my thoughts). So now I am working on a child's quilt with no one to give it to. I bought the expensive fabric that was made for the pattern (American Jane) and I just feel stupid working on something just to be quilting. I have no idea what to do with it but it has been so so expensive to make that I want it to go to someone who will appreciate it. I told her I can donate them but she seemed to think there is an over abundance of quilts and no one really wants them. I make her sound like an ogre and she really isn't, she just doesn't get it, Anyway now I feel bad about all the money and time I have spent just to appease my addiction when no one has any use for my work. I may not finish the child's quilt and just move on to something I intend to use as a gift, I think the intended recipient will appreciate it but now I am rethinking the whole idea of quilting as just plan selfish and self serving. So I've rambled on a long time with this, I just feel bad and I need some moral support to justify my need to continue what I love.

    I agree with everyone else and I say she doesn't get it either. On another note, there are always people who are in need of warmth and comfort, so why not make quilts for the needy or other charitable organizations?

  17. #17
    Super Member clem55's Avatar
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    what seems silly and pointless to others, doesn't matter if you are doing something to please yourself and fill your days. our kids don't have to agree with us, just as we don't have to agree with them.

  18. #18
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    You know your story could have been written by me. Same idea, I love making quilts but how many can we use. I have made tablerunners,wallhangings everthing I could think of and now I have plenty.
    We have an adult care facility in a near by town. These people really have nothing. How about making quilts/lap quilts for them. They will treasure them forever. I know because I have worked with them and they like the fact that some one cares for them.
    Keep up your hobby no matter how much others dont "get it".

  19. #19
    Moderator sharon b's Avatar
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    Sending you {{{{{{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}] and much encouragement :lol: Children and adults go to bed every night without a blanket , they would love a quilt ! Homeless shelters would love them, I am sure- maybe the childrens area of your local hospital ? And Quilts for Kids is a HUGE project this year :thumbup: And if you contact them they will send you a kit to make one with their fabric and then you can send two back- yours and theirs :lol:

    I for one will never be caught up on making quilts and don't even have one for myself :cry:

    Keep doing what you love to do - as long as you can do it :lol:

  20. #20
    Super Member CoriAmD's Avatar
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    As soon as I finish the quilt I am working on now, I am going to make some quilts for the local hosp. I talked to 2 different hosp. in my area and they are both eager for blankets for their NICU, Pediatric units.
    Last year I donated several fleece blankets to the local Cancer treatments center - may or may not do that again this year depending on time.
    Just because quilting is not your daughter's "thing" she shouldn't be negative about you doing it. If it makes you happy to do it, it has accomplished what it is supposed to do.
    Keep on doing it and enjoy every minute!

  21. #21
    Super Member Annaquilts's Avatar
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    I am sure it is cheaper then a psychiatrist. I am not neccesarily saying you would need one but for me quilting is therapy and it sounds like it is for you too.

    Maybe find causes or more worthy recipients of your gifts of love. Jan from VA from this quilt board is collecting quilts and tops to send to Afghanistan for the soldiers stationed there to help brigthen their day.

    Hugs, Anna

  22. #22
    Super Member Annaquilts's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by noveltyjunkie
    Quote Originally Posted by ktbb


    If you do what you love, those who love you will love what you do,
    I don't think this is realistic at all. Some of my husband's hobbies bug me, but I can see they give him pleasure so I keep silent. Just because he gets excited about stripping old engines does not require me to do the same!
    ROFL Thanks for the laugh.

  23. #23
    Super Member Annaquilts's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Charlee
    You need to quilt. It's your outlet.
    The others have valid suggestions. Quilts 4 Kids, Project Linus, Quilts of Valor would ALL appreciate your donations...and so would *I*!! :lol: That's it...just send those quilts to me...I will love them and take good care of them, and I don't care how many there are! ;) :)
    LOL I bet there would be many greatful recipients just on this board me and Charlee included and there are also so many people who do not have a quilt yet not on this baord.

  24. #24
    Super Member amandasgramma's Avatar
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    My daughter mentioned the same thing!!! I told her it was a LOT cheaper than a mental hospital. She said she didn't know what to do with them if I died...I said "Craigslist". She said it "costs sooooo much"....I told her I spend a LOT less per month than she does on her cigarettes. She got the hint.......... :mrgreen:

  25. #25
    sally's girl's Avatar
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    There are so many needed people out there to donate these beautiful quilts too....just to name a few......nursing homes (some of these poor dear souls are put in there and foresaken by their family) homeless shelters or abused women shelters. How about xmas programs for the needed, or Red Cross programs that help displaced folks from fire etc....or orphan homes.....God will bless you for your donations.

    Quote Originally Posted by jfowles
    So, I love quilting, dah!! it doesn't matter if I have someone to give it to, if I need it or even like it very much I just love quilting. My daughter who is my best friend and a wonderful friend at that, told me the other day, (at least this is what I heard) that it was all kind of a waste, I don't have anymore people to give them to and what is she going to do with them when I am gone. I have too many to display and they aren't good enough to give as works of art (my thoughts). So now I am working on a child's quilt with no one to give it to. I bought the expensive fabric that was made for the pattern (American Jane) and I just feel stupid working on something just to be quilting. I have no idea what to do with it but it has been so so expensive to make that I want it to go to someone who will appreciate it. I told her I can donate them but she seemed to think there is an over abundance of quilts and no one really wants them. I make her sound like an ogre and she really isn't, she just doesn't get it, Anyway now I feel bad about all the money and time I have spent just to appease my addiction when no one has any use for my work. I may not finish the child's quilt and just move on to something I intend to use as a gift, I think the intended recipient will appreciate it but now I am rethinking the whole idea of quilting as just plan selfish and self serving. So I've rambled on a long time with this, I just feel bad and I need some moral support to justify my need to continue what I love.

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