Yes. This is my dilemma. I do know her. She is my niece but from another state. I probably will talk to my sister in law but I know that she will then ask her daughter and it will not be a surprise. But you are right, I do not want to spend time and money on something that will not be appreciated. I am still seeking ideas before I make that decision. Thank you.

I made this for my sister in law for her 2nd marriage. I didn’t know the husband at all, and she doesn’t really seem to have any preferences- tastes run very eclectic. I made this completely from my stash except for the batting. It was very well received. This has become my go to pattern. I’ve made 4-5 of them so far.

Do you ever see this niece in person? When I made a quilt for my boss and coworker as a surprise I paid attention to what colors they wore or if they showed me pictures of their home for the colors. I also tried to pay attention to what they talked about. For example, my coworker is a crazy cat lady just like me. We both talk about our pets a lot. And when she was buying a new couch she talked about it. The couch was leather and she liked cats. So I made her this quilt: https://www.quiltingboard.com/pictur...s-t258144.html She loved it.

My boss is the only woman in a house full of guys. Even the dog is a boy. So I wanted to have something that would appeal to just her. I notices she wore a lot of turquoise and coral colors and I wanted something kind of flowery and feminine. So I made her this: https://www.quiltingboard.com/pictur...t-t258728.html
Or do as aashley333 suggested and ask them for a single color they like or maybe ask what the wedding colors are and take it from there.

Why don't you make a quilt that you would like for your own taste. Something that you like. Quilting should always be something that is not stressful especially for someone that you do not have a close relationship to. People close to me are the only ones I have made a quilt for. I would keep it simple and do only a full size quilt. Queen and King are way to stressful.

Besides asking your sister in law, you might check to see if they have "registered" anywhere yet. Often they will list their preferred colors for towels, bedding, etc, and you may get a clue from that. Even the type of hard goods they request may yield a clue, as to whether they like modern, classical, or whimsical.

I have asked about the bride's wedding party colors and done quilts in those colors, figuring those would be liked. Three have been wallhangings and the fourth was a very large throw or smaller bed sized quilt.

This is what I was going to suggest. A registry will give you many clues. How old is she? My own daughter says quilts aren’t her thing so I won’t bother. I made quilts for my grandtwins but made blue instead of green for the boy (made to coordinate with the focus fabric used for both babies) and have never seen the quilt used(nursery is green and pink. So that hurts, to be honest. Another daughter-in-law only decorates in aqua, mint, grey and white, so I wouldn’t give anything but. These are people I know well, and I am walking on eggshells about quilt choices. I’d be reluctant to invest such effort to someone I didn’t know as well. Maybe a pair of monogrammed, neutral Throw pillows that They could put on their sofa or bed, and then something from their registry?

I was in this exact situation a few years ago! I told my story here:
https://www.quiltingboard.com/pictur...ml

When in doubt, do something you want to do.

Why not just ask?

I usually make a large throw instead of a bed quilt. it takes half the fabric and cost, and if it doesn’t match their bedroom decor it can always be used on the couch or for a picnic, etc. You could make it a neutral colour, an it be more likely to be well used.