After my MIL died, I inherited a beautiful, handquilted, double wedding ring with scalloped edges that some local quilters had made for her. It sat in a chair for close to 20 years and was filthy. I had to wash it three times just to get the dirt out. It is now on my bed. I never bothered to make her a quilt because I could see that she didn't appreciate them. She was a wonderful person in so many ways and raised a wonderful son that I dearly love, but for her, a quilt was just another blanket...everybody is different!

Great thread and well said. It's a good thing to keep in mind at any time of the year but especially at Christmas when we get stressed trying to get everyone gifts. I think a lot put so much of their hearts into their work(and there are a lot of really big hearts on this board). This is why I put my quilts away. When I'm gone, if my family wants them, they'll have a piece of me to "hug" them, if not I'll never know and won't be hurt if they use them to change the oil from their cars. I know we need to vent but we also need to realize that to some, our quilts are blankets and if they already have 25 blankets why would they want 1 more. So, as has been said, if you give a quilt to someone, know before hand that they will appreciate it or be ready to have them not value it the same as you do.

Quilts are art IMHO. Taste in art is individual. I wouldn't give someone a painting, a sculpture, a music CD or ticket to a concert without being very sure it is wanted/liked. It's not a good idea to give a Picasso to someone who loves Thomas Kinkade or hip-hop music to a Bach buff.

The quilts I have made for family members have never been surprises but only after consulting about pattern & color. We all have wildly different opinions of how a quilt should look. If I do happen to give one not suited to taste or decor, I hope the recipient has sense enough to use it as a quilt was originally meant--for warmth, under a bedspread. Charity quilters understand this--warmth and durability are the purpose, beauty is a bonus.

I don't have a solution to the hurt caused by unappreciated quilt gifts. I do believe many of the finished quilts and unfinished tops come on the market because of death--and the deceased is the last of a family--just like the sad (to me) boxes and albums of photographs at flea markets and antique shops. I cannot imagine discarding family photos, can you?

Yes, my friend made a baby quilt for a friend and later, while visiting, saw it in the dogs bed. Really hurt her feelings.

Years ago before I knew anything about quilting my mother's aunt passed away. While cleaning out her home family members came across a hope chest full of quilts she had made and I can remember one of my aunts asking my mother which of Mary's quilts she would like to have. Mother replied "Can I throw them in the washing machine? If not I don't want anything to do with them." My aunt replied "I don't think so".
Well, I would have loved to have had one of them but I was only about 13 at the time and no one asked me if I would like to have one. I have made mother small wall hangings but nothing she can't throw in the washing machine. Ann in TN

:thumbup:

Mine too. That's what he says about quilting. He doesn't understand cross stitching, he says why do you do it if it makes you crazy? which it does occassionally. He does appreciate handwork and crafts since he is handy. But I agree, I only bless recipients that I KNOW will appreciate my efforts. Not enough time anyway.

I'm laughing about this one!

I don't know where my love of quilting and homemade items comes from. As I seem to come from a long line of "buy it at the mall" relatives.

two years ago I make quilts for my 3 granddaugters
and I have seen them on the floor since than
That sure gets me---I have said ,if they don't want them, they can give them back