What wonderful things has she done with her life? I don't know how I would have handled such a situation. You were great!

Or, if you can't say something nice, at least have the decency to be vague.


I think I would have given her the 15 second stare, followed by...

"Now why on EARTH would you feel the need to make comments like that?"

Really, what was her point?

It is your quilt you can make it what ever way you choose. We can choose our friends but not our relatives.

That's disgraceful - too bad some people have to put others down to think it makes them 'bigger' (which achieved the complete opposite) ;-)

As for your reactions to her STUPID remarks, you certainly showed who has the CLASS & DIGNITY in that room. I don't think I could have been as diplomatic. You go gal!!!! :thumbup:

How freakin' rude! All I can hear in my head is my Mom saying you can find something nice to say about everything otherwise keep it shut! The absolute gall of some people.

Kudos for you !! You did a great job of remaining calm, and then telling her about your background !!
You are my hero because I would of told them to leave and told the friend to comeback anytime but don't bring her in front of her !LOL

You did GOOD!!!

WOW, you put up with her longer than I. About three minutes of that and she would have stayed her welcome and out the door. I'm glad you handled it so much better than I. WTG!!

So do I. You have much more patience than I do. I would have shut her down a lot sooner than you did. Sounds like she would be an "expert" in about any subject.

It's one thing being stupid, but, another to open your mouth and prove it. In this case the girl. How terrible for her to act when she knows nothing about quilting. I bet she won't be back.

wow! what a dunderhead that person was! I hope your friend doesnt let this nut browbeat the want to quilt out of her. Sometimes new quilters are unsure and this person sounds like a real terror in pushing herself into other's business. sharet

Oh my gosh.....you were far kinder than I would of been ! WOW, the nerve of that person !

How RUDE! ARROGANT! AGGRESSIVE!

To come to someone's home and ATTACK for 20 minutes....

She must be a very unhappy person with low self esteem to have to intentionally do this to someone. You know this has to be a "trait" she uses on many people; I think of her children | husband.

With your expertise and experiences, you were able to "let this attack" go out the door with her; whereas, many "learning quilters" might have decided not to quilt any more and would hear these HARSH WORDS over and over in their head and heart for years.

I wonder what happened to her to make her this way. Very sad.

Thanks for sharing your response. Good advice for dealing with these quilt police.

What a day!! Poor child, she didn't know what she was doing. One isn't allowed to be that opinionated until after 40 and even then one is NEVER given a pass on being RUDE!!!

Good for you for telling her where to go ;-)

There are people in this world that only know how to be negative and I mean about everything. They will find fault with everything and everybody. I think when they meet the Lord they will tell him what he did wrong.
I think this is the only way that they can feel good about themsellves. I speak from experience because I have been married to one for almost 40 years. He learned to do better as we raised our family but now that we are older and he has many health problems he is worse than ever. Please do not make comments about why do I stay with him. It is my personal choice and very private.

Oh, MY! You handled that situation very well. Hopefully the cousin will learn some humilty, but I doubt it.

OMW, what a nervy little thing, glad you put her in her place!!!!

You got that right, CJO!!!

In addition to running into people 'raised in a barn' I have met some not raised at all, just 'thrown out in the wild'!!! (I married one ;-) good news is if they aren't too far gone they can learn to do better later in life)

Hats off to you, you did great. Here's to YOU WOOT WOOT

LOVE that phrase, earthwalker. Mind if I steal? I'll give credit ;-)

I can believe it. welcome to the new generations of smart A...attitudes, no respect, sense of entitlement, jerks. Hope you told her you PAID for your degree too. Didn't take out student loans and then think the govt. or rich should pay them for you... I tell you what, I've about had it and hope that this generation gets the humbling they deserve. I include my own children in this attitude of mine. It's just not right.
I"m sorry for you, but use this experience to see just how they are. They are like this in every way.

ROFLMBO!!!

I couldn't have been that composed. I envy your handling of this horrible situation.
This reminds me of when I showed my Civil War Quilt at our Guild. A young girl rattled off all of the things that were wrong with it, and what she would have done that would have made it so much better. This was all of the time the quilts were shown around the room. She ruined my showing my quilt.
I was totally mortified. After I cooled off, I wrote her an email, and reminded her that our guild says in writing that we are not to comment except postively about someone's work.
How many quilts has she made? None. I know she has been in guild at least 5 yrs.
Some people have to leave their brains at home when seeing other's work.
Mariah.

Can you say "B". Wow I don't know how you did it. I would have probably snatched her baldheaded. The nerve of some people. I also would have told
her to leave & don't let the door hit you in the behind on the way out. She is not from the south that is for sure.

I admire your tact and restraint, and I'm jealous that I don't have those qualities.
Rowdy person that I am, I would have given her such a smack!

I admire your tact and wisdom.

You are a very gracious person. You responded with firm kindness that demanded respect. Good for you! I would not have been so kind, I would have spouted off something very rude and kicked her to the curb, while being nice to my quilting friend.

I've gotten very good at saying "You can leave now. No, seriously, leave, now" Usually to my DH because he just doesn't understand quilting at all.

I think you should change the title of your thread to "A Moron Came to Visit."

I don't think many people would have handled the situation with the tact and grace that you did. Bravo to you!

There are people who's goal in life seems to be asserting their "position" regardless of what it is or what they know. Big mouths, big opinions - thats all it is as it doesn't change reality. Incredible and for what purpose. Do they not realize how they look when they walk away?I too wonder how they justify. Im no help here, I work with someone like that, a regular jaw-dropper.

Some people think they are authorities on everything and anything.
QUILTERS would never have behaved that way. We remember our first quilt or even our first blocks, we encourage each other. That's why we are on this QB.

I couldn't pick my jaw up off the floor as i read what you wrote about the cousin's behavior toward you. She must have been extremely envious and resentful to act out to such a degree. That went way beyond quilt police criticism! It's like she had decided to bully you. That person must be an exceedingly insecure individual to go to such lengths to put others down. You handled the situation so well that we could all learn from it: first with patience & grace and then with firmness & kindness (for your poor friend) You are so right, we can't help who we are related to!

Fabulous. And I loved that you didn't end your sentence with a preposition!! lol

I have a friend who has foot in mouth disease. I do not shop for fabric with her anymore. It is so embaressing to go shopping with her as she is the worst quilt police that walks this earth! She has to open her fat yap telling others what fabric to use. She starts out ohhh my dear those fabric just don't look good together. I think she does it on purpase so she can annoy people enough that they walk away so she can get her fabric cut sooner. If she drives up in my driveway I lock the door till she leaves!!!

Maybe she was jealous because she can't sew so she had to tear down your talents. Wonder how many friends she has. Pity her and hope she learns soon before she has no friends.

OMG I cried just reading ...how very rude and stupid of this cousin to be so blantly ignorate...I am glad you showed her to the door and tried to put her where she belonged but by the sounds of her it didn't faze her...God love you for being as nice as you were...blessings

Well I always say the quilt only has to satisfy you. I have had people do that to me too. Live and learn.

She just had to cut you down to make herself feel superior. There are people like that in this world. They always want others to think they know sooo much more and they only show their ignorance!

A few days ago, someone posted asking what the "Quilt Police" look like...You found out first hand, didn't you?!
Now, if you can post a picture of her, or even a drawing - from your memory- then we will all know who to steer clear of!
You handled it like a pro. I'm proud of you, because I would not have been nearly as gracious and polite as you were!
I'm afraid that my solution might have involved a body bag and a coroners inquest!!! (maybe a quilted body bag, done all the WRONG ways!!!)

I admire your strength and patience to get you through that. You handled it with perfect grace. I would have thrown her out on her rear!

Suggestion: Call your friend, and tell her about this web board, then suggest that she share it with her (evil) cousin! After reading these posts from total strangers, Cousin It might be adjusted, just a little bit, in her attitude.