"elevate and ice"

I work in Ortho

I second gaigai's quotes. I've been a labor and delivery RN for 15 years and a lactation consultant for 5 years. I've always said that I'd like a tshirt that says "You got her pregnant, you can get her ice chips". Family is always asking me for something nonmedical and not urgent that they could do, when there is a pressing medical concern that I must address first. Sometimes a 26 yr old resident says something baseless or inane, which the pt repeats as if it's gospel, b/c the "doctor said so", to which I say, "I've got socks older than her". I also often say, " babies do that", "babies don't know what time it is", and "your baby didn't read that book". If it were me, I wouldn't want to receive a quilt that had any sayings on it that depict nurses as uncaring. We get that too much from people that just can't accept that life is full of pain, that we can't always completely alleviate. We don't order the meds, we just give 'em. Here's another quote, "Doctor, she weighs 300lbs, I think that dose is a little stingy".

LOL! Sounds like you work where I did!

How about
Real Nurse can fix anything with tape!
If you can't fix it with tape, it can't be fixed.
If that Doctor doesn't like it, he can talk to ME!
Why is it when we're busy we get no breaks, but when it's quiet we don't get longer breaks?
I'm not just a pretty face - I'm smart too.
Supper trays will be here shortly.
Visiting hours are OVER!
Nurses get to the point.

'Didn't happen on MY shift"

not to be a downer, but i am an RN working as a surveyor to regulate care in nursing homes.
many of the saying here are "funny" and things we may think sometimes but never say.
nursing homes and their staff get a bum rap so i'd think you might want to go a different way. maybe saying about the elderly, gray headedness is the crown of glory, things about wisdom with experience, treating our residents the way we would want our family or us to be treated, etc.
that said, whatever you think she'd like is best.

You want What???

I agree with you--retired RN here who has done geriatrics. It is not all fun and games as you say. If I could go back, would choose another profession for a lot of reasons.

Here are some more saying;
1. we need a urine specimen
2. Have you had your flu shot
3, Did you fill out your menu
4.I will have to check with the doctor
5. The doctor wants you to schedule your mammogram

The funniest thing about this thread is that a real nurse can tell immediately which posts were made by nurses and which were made by non-medical personnel! :lol: :lol: :lol:

I am a old ICU nurse (burnt out too) and I LOVE your quotes. I could give a few quotes but they probably would not be appropriate LOL