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Thread: Quilt or Blanket?

  1. #1
    Super Member Lneal's Avatar
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    I have found, in my three short years of quilting, that not every quilt I have given is valued like I would value it. Some people appreciate my time, effort, and money, that I put into the special quilt they have received. While this is true, I have known others who treat my quilt, given as a gift, as though I had given them a blanket. No thought of returning a Thank You card seems to annoy me the most. Is this typical for quilters who give gifts?

  2. #2
    Super Member charismah's Avatar
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    Well I think some people don't actually know the value of a quilt...eitehr teh work put into it or the cost of it..quilting is not a cheap hobbie so I guess it is our job as gift givers to know whether a person will actually value a gift from us.
    But as I always tell my children when we give a gift there is no expectations of anything with it..so when I give something is it pushed out of my mind as to whether they will treasure things the way I treasure them...so I guess it is up to you as to which pholosophy on this you will side on.

  3. #3
    Super Member Tiffany's Avatar
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    Charisma is right, many people do not understand the time, effort, and money that goes into a quilt. I became very frustrated by this many years ago and found a great solution. It involves a bit of effort on my part but it was amazing how suddenly my quilted gifts were no longer being dragged out to use as a picnic or beach blanket. I bought a timer from WalMart, one of those that you push the button and it acts like a stopwatch in keeping time. It cost about $5. Any time I work on a particular quilt I will keep track of the time spent on the quilt. Once it is done I will add the hours to the label. Many people are shocked when they see the hundreds of hours that go into a good sized quilt and suddenly it is no longer just something to throw around & treat recklessly.

    Nothing spins me faster then walking thru the park and seeing a beautiful quilt thrown on the ground, usually in the dirt, with kids running back and forth over it with their dirty shoes. I've sworn to DH I'm going to "rescue" them, at which point he hurries me past because I'm usually saying something naughty just a bit too loudly. It usually goes like this... "I cannot believe they would treat something that took hundreds of hours to make like it was a cheap WalMart blanket. How thoughtless..." I'd spout off about how quilting fabric is $8-$15 a yard and what a waste on people who can't appreciate what they have, but usually hubby has drug me past by then. I know I shouldn't, but it just really bugs me to see something like that treated so poorly.

  4. #4
    Power Poster amma's Avatar
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    Some peoples quilts ended up being used as moving blankets, used for animal beds, stuffed in car trunks, used, abused, misused. Other's were afraid to use them...they were too beautiful, afraid something would happen to them. Yet other's used them and treated them with love and respect.
    Quilts are not everyone's cup of tea...be selective over who you give them to, or be willing to turn your head to what happens once they are in the recipients hands. Maybe ask if they would like a quilt, how they would use it, and then decide how much time, effort and money to put into one for them :wink:

  5. #5
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    Believe me, you're not alone. I also know people who have gifted quilts with the same result as you. Maybe, what we should do is make a little card to go with the quilt, saying how much time goes into just making the quilt, I don't know if that would really help or not though and some people just have no manners about thank yous.

  6. #6
    Senior Member Shelley's Avatar
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    This topic has been discussed on several boards I'm on. It boils down to this. Some people are 'quilt-worthy', some are not.

    I make graduation quilts for my kids' friends (close friends ONLY!) If I don't think they will appreciate the time and effort that has gone into a quilt, I will write them a check for graduation. So far, I'm batting 100 on the quilts being taken care of by the kids (or protected by the parents!)

    I really like the idea of keeping track of the time needed to make the quilt and put it on the label. I also piece and watch tv, make dinner, do laundry, help the kids with homework, so this might be interesting. When I quilt, I'm in my own world and don't have all the distractions of the house, and I still have a hard time keeping track of things. Certainly something to think about! Great idea!

  7. #7
    Super Member Olivia's Grammy's Avatar
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    A friend of a friend made a cat fabric quilt for her friend. The friend thought the maker of her quilt would be quilte pleased that her cat had kittens on the homemade quilt. :cry:

  8. #8
    Super Member Tiffany's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Olivia's Gramy
    A friend of a friend made a cat fabric quilt for her friend. The friend thought the maker of her quilt would be quilte pleased that her cat had kittens on the homemade quilt. :cry:
    :shock: Oh no! That is so sad. I'm sure the kitty didn't think so and was probably thrilled to have such great bedding. I think I would have cried.

  9. #9
    Super Member jljack's Avatar
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    Oh, ewwww!!! I hope she recovered from that shock!!!

  10. #10
    Super Member carrieg's Avatar
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    I used to do a lot of cross stitch and embroidery. It's a much discussed subject among those groups too. It's especially discussed about divorced couples and whatever happens to the wedding sampler that was made for them. The time and materials and add to that the cost of professional framing.

    My SIL was going to sell at her garage sale an embroidery I did for my brother long before he was married. For one dollar!! My girlfriend rescued it and it now hangs in her home.

    Now only my mom and charities receive my quilts.

  11. #11
    Junior Member K.P.'s Avatar
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    You need to know, who is 'quilt worthy' and who is not...doesn't take much investigation to find out, if there is any doubt, they don't get one of my quilts...

  12. #12
    Moderator littlehud's Avatar
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    I always give my quilts with a note to please use them and most people do. My soon to be son in law has has packed his away because he feels it is a heirloom because it is hand made. I would rather he used it but it was given as a gift and he can do as he wants with it. SIGH

  13. #13
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    My wife wants to save the quilts that I have made her and treat them with special care not to have the dogs sleep on them or jump up on them. I keep telling her that I made that one I can always make another one. I like for mine to be used and loved at the same time and not stuffed into a closet to be saved.

    What good is something if you cant use and enjoy it. :roll:

    Billy

  14. #14
    Super Member LindaM's Avatar
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    I also put together a 'story of your quilt' when I give one as a gift - with photos as it was going together, why I selected the pattern or what it means to me. Along with washing information, etc. It does give me an opportunity to put into words how the gift is intended to help give comfort whenever they may need it ...

    My last quilt, I titled 'Tame the Wild Things' - a giraffe quilt - for a friend having a really tough time with depression, dealing with her own demons; she has the wry wit to understand I meant this to help her tame her demons.

    I do like the idea of including the time it took you to put it together on the label!

  15. #15
    Super Member Lneal's Avatar
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    I never expect the quilts I give to not be used. However, I do feel people can or cannot show gratitude for them by how they use them. I really do enjoy making and giving to others and I'm sure most people appreciate it, but how about a Thank You card for that special gift? Is that not worthy for all the time and money? I just wonder if it is a thing of the past.

  16. #16
    Junior Member K.P.'s Avatar
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    I usually send a story with my quilts too, but when I see it later in the bottom of a trunk with a dirty tire laying on it, it ticks me off after all the time/effort/money that goes into one, some just do not appreciate or understand what goes into making a quilt, especially if it is a nice pattern or lots of applique'; I still think they need to be 'quilt worthy' before receiving one; if it's a child and they lie one it, sleep with it, tinkle on it, not a problem, at least it's being used and enjoyed, which is why you gave it to them, but when it's dirty, covered with mud, laying in the trunk and not taken care of, they won't get another one...

  17. #17
    Super Member SaraSewing's Avatar
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    I think that valuing a quilt has to do with upbringing. I gave my neice a quilt for her wedding this summer. She was SO appreciative. Her brother came to our place for Thanksgiving and joked it was to "butter me up" for a quilt of his own someday. It has to do with being taught appreciation by my sister.

    I never gave a quilt to my first DIL because I knew she didn't value such things. When they divorced my son got the wool quilt from an Aunt because HE valued it.

    I won't even consider giving a quilt to someone without knowing their appreciation level. My son's best friend got one of my quilts. Even tho his mom didnn't sew or quilt, he had watched me through his youth making them and knew that this was just not any ole' gift.

  18. #18
    Power Poster MadQuilter's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by lneal
    I have found, in my three short years of quilting, that not every quilt I have given is valued like I would value it.
    That's why my list of recipients (except charity work) is very selective.

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    Super Member sawsan's Avatar
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    http://www.quiltingboard.com/t-31041-1.htm

    some friends spoke about giving up their which is not easy 4 me

  20. #20
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    Quote Originally Posted by lneal
    I have found, in my three short years of quilting, that not every quilt I have given is valued like I would value it. Some people appreciate my time, effort, and money, that I put into the special quilt they have received. While this is true, I have known others who treat my quilt, given as a gift, as though I had given them a blanket. No thought of returning a Thank You card seems to annoy me the most. Is this typical for quilters who give gifts?

    If you value the quilt too much that you "can't let it go" then keep it until you make something that you like better. The key is being able to "let it go". Once you give it away it is no longer yours.

  21. #21
    Super Member Tiffany's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by littlehud
    I always give my quilts with a note to please use them and most people do. My soon to be son in law has has packed his away because he feels it is a heirloom because it is hand made. I would rather he used it but it was given as a gift and he can do as he wants with it. SIGH
    What about giving him a quilt rack to display his quilt on? I think that would be a great follow-up gift for a birthday or holiday. You can explain that it is meant to display the quilt he has without it getting damaged while still allowing him to enjoy it. Plus, you can explain how it needs to be refolded every so often in order to keep it from getting a permenant crease and damaging the fabrics in the crease line. Just a thought.

    You know, in the 18 years I've been quilting I have never received a thank you card. :( I hadn't realized that until it was brought up. How sad!

  22. #22
    Super Member Boston1954's Avatar
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    There have been many times when I got annoyed when I felt that what I had made was not appreciated. Funny thing, though, it has never happened with quilts.

  23. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tiffany
    Charisma is right, many people do not understand the time, effort, and money that goes into a quilt. I became very frustrated by this many years ago and found a great solution. It involves a bit of effort on my part but it was amazing how suddenly my quilted gifts were no longer being dragged out to use as a picnic or beach blanket. I bought a timer from WalMart, one of those that you push the button and it acts like a stopwatch in keeping time. It cost about $5. Any time I work on a particular quilt I will keep track of the time spent on the quilt. Once it is done I will add the hours to the label. Many people are shocked when they see the hundreds of hours that go into a good sized quilt and suddenly it is no longer just something to throw around & treat recklessly.

    Nothing spins me faster then walking thru the park and seeing a beautiful quilt thrown on the ground, usually in the dirt, with kids running back and forth over it with their dirty shoes. I've sworn to DH I'm going to "rescue" them, at which point he hurries me past because I'm usually saying something naughty just a bit too loudly. It usually goes like this... "I cannot believe they would treat something that took hundreds of hours to make like it was a cheap WalMart blanket. How thoughtless..." I'd spout off about how quilting fabric is $8-$15 a yard and what a waste on people who can't appreciate what they have, but usually hubby has drug me past by then. I know I shouldn't, but it just really bugs me to see something like that treated so poorly.

    Oh no........... I plan on making a picnic quilt for myself this winter. I want it a 9 patch with calico, so if you see me on a picnic one day please don't be rude I made it as a picnic quilt on purpose. Also I bought vintage picnic baskets with painted lids, I hope to one day make matching picnic quilts to go with them and give them to my children.

  24. #24
    KBunn's Avatar
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    I tried selecting the recipents of the quilts....but that is not always possible to do. For example... I have two sister in laws that treasure the quilts I made and have taught their children to also treat them with respect. However I have a third that does not value anything and hence neither does her children. For those that I "should" make a quilt to avoid hard feelings...I limit not only what I will spend on the material but also what kind of time I will invest. Quickie weekend quilts have been something I felt I could give to those that dont have the appreciation for the work involved....that way everyone ends up with their quilt and my feelings are less hurt.

  25. #25
    Super Member Tiffany's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by trupeach
    Oh no........... I plan on making a picnic quilt for myself this winter. I want it a 9 patch with calico, so if you see me on a picnic one day please don't be rude I made it as a picnic quilt on purpose. Also I bought vintage picnic baskets with painted lids, I hope to one day make matching picnic quilts to go with them and give them to my children.
    There are quilts I've seen that I know are made especially for picnics and I don't have any problem with that. I'm talking about walking past something like a Baltimore Album quilt or something that is obviously NOT a quilt for outside. I promise only to stop and admire your picnic quilt and not say naughty things. :wink:

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