I think I'm wearing my feelings on my sleeves, but I'm hurt. I just sent my niece and nephew quilts (full-size) for their graduation presents. I insured them and tracked them and know that they were delivered on Saturday (today is Wednesday). Still haven't heard a word from them. I have about $200 in each quilt plus the labor and I think a phone call or e-mail would have been nice. Their mom (my sister-in-law) has also never acknowledged the Christmas ornaments I made for her last Christmas. Guess I'll get them storebought gifts from now on. It isn't worth it to work on something that is not appreciated. Here are pics of the items I sent. Am I being unrealistic?

I'm sorry your feelings are hurt - but some people just don't get it.

Your gifts are lovely.

Take pride in your job well done and gift freely. It will come back to you - but maybe not from your family.

Sometimes you have to get your joy from the doing of something you love...Naomi :thumbup: :thumbup:

That is very dissapointing! But if you never get any acknowledgement of their gifts, why do you gift them at all? Will it bother you less if they don't acknowledge a store bought gift? It is a shame that nobody sends thank you notes anymore? or even a thank you email. Manners are a thing of the past I guess. . .

Thanks. That is exactly what I needed to hear. Let me get over myself and do what I love.

I think a phone call is in order just to make sure that they actually got them. I have heard of packages being left by the front door or on the porch. If they got them and didn't acknowledge them, at least you know they weren't ripped off.

You do beautiful work. Your quilts and ornaments are lovely. :thumbup:

It is difficult to understand why people just don't call and say thanks. I too have relatives who would not appreciate any of the handmade items I make so I choose to give to those who will. Those quilts are beautiful!

It's too often in this modern day society, that people don't have the decency to thank people for handmade gifts or even store bought gifts. Your gifts are beautiful, but I don't know if I would have made anything for the niece and nephew, since you had made Christmas ornaments for the mother and she didn't bother to send a thank you or a phone call for them, so obviously she didn't bother to teach the children to send thank you's for gifts. Personally, I wouldn't bother buying them gifts either, but do whatever is comfortable for you.

This is so sad. I`m not the best quilter (starting a class soon) but I can`t count how many I1ve made for our family. I enjoy making kids quilts....no critics there. They pick out what they want, and I can piece squares to gether, I learnd how to make pillow cases here on the board. Next sunday my grand son will get a racing car quilt & checker flag pillow case. But I have children that don`t like home made stuff, and I embroidered a quilt for a friends Ann. And it didn`t go very well. I tried, made it her favorit colors & flowers, & worked on it almost a year. I`ll stay with the little ones, you can tell right away how much they like it.

That is so sad. Yes, I would definitely call and make sure they arrived. But, since your gifts don't get acknowledged, I am of the mindset that you should no longer send gifts of any sort. If gifts aren't even acknowledged whether made or bought apparently they aren't appreciated.

Bye the way I LOVE the quilts, they are beautiful.

I was thinking the same thing. If the mother doesn't acknowledge a gift with a simple thank you, I'm sure she never taught her children that basic manner.

if more time goes by without their contacting you, send them an email or text or note in the mail stating you are a bit worried since those handmade qlts cost you so much to make and send. hint, hint.
then forget it and buy any future gifts as you said.
((()))

You should definitely call or email and make sure they received the gifts, because sometimes packages are delivered to the wrong door. Let's hope that handwritten thank you notes from the niece and nephew are currently in the mail and will be delivered to your mailbox today.

It doesn't matter whether it's a handmade quilt (a HUGE gift) or a check for $5, all gifts should be acknowledged and the giver thanked, yet some teenagers (and many adults too) never learned to do this.

Wow, those quilts are beautiful! You should be very proud. I have 2 nephews and 1 niece I have given things to and only ever hear from 1 nephew. My niece wanted a bag made out of skulls this past June. Made it, sent it to her and have heard nothing yet. I don't expect to either. I know it's hard to not get a TY or something, but they say it's the thought that counts.

BTW- What pattern did you use?

I'm so sorry you have to be upset & concerned about your gifts being received. It's such a shame that appreciation takes a back seat to indifference. Your quilts are gorgeous and maybe someday those kids will realize how generous a person you are.

Your work is beautiful. Anyone should be thrilled to get such lovely gift's. I would call them and ask if it got there,that you had so much money and time in it you were afraid it was lost. Then they might have the curtsy to let you here from them.

They are lovely quilts, but give them a little more time, most people are very busy and it has been a short time. They probably love their gifts and will surely call, maybe they sent a note and it hasn't arrived to you yet. I sure hope so

Your work is beautiful! If their mother has never acknowledged the ornaments you sent, then it's likely she has never taught her children to acknowledge gifts. Unfortunately, many people don't understand the work and love that goes into a quilt (as well as the gorgeous ornaments you made). I take much joy in every quilt I make, but I've learned that while some people that see them are amazed by them, others don't get it at all. If they're not creative people themselves - they just don't understand.

Funny thing, I made quilts for all of my grandchildren. My daughters' children called me right away and let me know they received them and thanked me, but my Son's children never said a word. I thought it was rude and ungrateful of them and told my Son so. Some people just don't know or care how much work and love is in each quilt we do. Your quilts and ornaments are beautiful and we all appreciated how much you put into each one of them.

I know how you feel. I recently made 2 baby quilts, but wasn't there when they were opened. I heard thru the family they were well received, but have not received a thank you.

I love the quilts, especially the purple one!

I completely understand your hurt feelings. I have sent out 2 baby quilts myself and if it werent' for the tracking and picture I saw on FB I would still be wondering if they were recieved.

I think your quilts and ornaments are fantastic!!

I'm afraid the "art" of being polite and appreciative has been nearly lost to the younger generations, but whose fault is that?I say it is usually the parents who never taught them . Try not to let your feelings be hurt and I agree that I would not bother with handmade gifts , if any, from now on.

The quilts are a turning twenty variation.

I'm so sorry this happened and I understand your pain and frustration. Your work is excellent. Shame on the kids and especially the parents for not acknowledging these beautiful quilts. I think that you are right --- gifts from Walmart would be more fitting for them from this point.

Double post. My apologies.

I agree that you need to contact them... just say, I sent some packages and they appear to be delivered, did you get them?

Wow, your work is beautiful! I'm sorry for your hurt feelings.

My feelings would be hurt too, I made a baby quilt for a girl at church who and she never used it. She told me thank you but it was never used and that hurt my feelings. Not everyone appreciates the gift of a handmade item, some people think of them a cheap or not quality.

No one knows the amount of hours and time put into gifts like quilts.

A gift is just that... a gift. It should be freely given, with no strings attached, or you are setting yourself up for disappointment. The value of the gift, and handmade, or not, should not matter. You either want to give a gift and expect nothing in return, or you are expecting "payment" for the present even if it is as small as acknowledgement. Then when you are not acknowledged, thanked, praised or offered money, your feelings are hurt. I understand this. I have been there. However, the fault is mine and/or yours, for expecting "payment". You either want to give something and truely expect nothing in return, thus a "gift" or you should make your expectations clear and express your hurt feelings, or forgive and forget it. You are only hurting you by being upset about it or looking for "reward or payment" in round-about ways.
Sorry for writing a book. Hope this helps everyone. God bless us all!!!
Lots of love, Teresa

Why would you even bother? Bad manners shouldn't be rewarded - whether or not the gift was handmade.
If you had spent the $200 on store bought items, would you be any less pissed off that there was no acknowledgment?
I wouldn't.

I'd check online that it was delivered (and if it was insured, you should be able to see a signature depending on the service you used).
Then I'd give it another week to wait for a lovely hand written thank-you note (or email) for your lovely gifts.

That should give you your answer for the next time a gift is expected. ;-)

I used to give gifts to all my nieces and nephews and their children also, but would never hear from them. I finally stopped sending anything to any of them. It's very freeing.

Your qults are very lovely and I'm sure that they love them at least they should.

This is so true! Thanks Teresa for the reminder to us all. Are we looking for the "praises" of people, when it should be about the gift and not the giver! The Lord sets us that example so well, too bad we dont always follow that!

eta:
Someone contributed this to the quote thread yesterday (and I'm paraphrasing because I"m too lazy to go look for it).

No one can walk all over you unless you lie down
or something to that effect.

OK, went to look for it and see it was deleted. :roll:

Anyway, give it a week or two for them to respond.

Teresa,
Thanks for your honesty. You are precisely right and I need to let go of the gift. Sometimes I just need the grounding of this group to carry on. Thanks again.
Lois

They are beautiful. Maybe they just haven't had time to call.

wow they are all beautiful projects....some people just dont appreciate handmade stuff...and i def feel that in todays fast paced society with technology a good old thank you note is a thing of the past....we live in a want it now/ send it now world. I think you should still give your beautiful gifts and know that even though they didnt say thank you that you have graced their lives with a gift that cant be store bought....its the gift of love stitched in all your projects

every year my children get a gift for christmas and then they are usually told by the gift giver how much it cost....i dont agree with this as i have always taught the children that a gift is still a gift no matter the cost....its the thought that counts not the price tag.

I agree a gift is a gift, but we are human beings and we come with feelings! I feel bad, But I love them all!!!!! :mrgreen:

well give it a little more time you know how young kids are im sure you will hear from them they are pretty quilts love the ornaments

Such beautiful gifts, I would have been thrilled to receive them. I think I would call to make sure they got it, postage is expensive too, then not bother them with gifts anymore.