weezie

No, it's not a sign of the times ... a certain portion of the population has always been mean and/or rude. I started school in 1949 ... it was basically my first encounter with people other than friends and family. Since that first day of school, I've never known a time or place (and I've lived a lot of places) where there are NOT mean, petty people who apparently have a need to feel superior.

There is also a percentage of people who are a genuine class act. They are good, kind, generous, loyal, and help make life worthwhile.

The rest of the population (and the largest percentage) are middle-of-the road ... like me. I'm not rude, petty or mean, but I will never be as fine a person as I'd like to be ... not in this lifetime.

I've just read all 9 pages of the "Feeling left out" responses, so am a little confused by the comments about all quilters being nice. Obviously, NOT all quilters are nice!

OHSue

Well, people only talk about the bad experiences with guilds. I have recently joined two guilds in my area. Both were welcoming to my friend and I, we were encouraged to join the swaps. I was able to take a Carol Doak workshop at one of them only a few months after joining and had a great time with the ladies there. I also belong to a weavers guild. I am a member of long standing, but we make it a point to welcome visitors and I personally take the time to chat with a newcomer as do several other members. I have also belonged to a knitters guild where I was also made welcome by the members, most of who were much more skilled than I was.
I don't think all guilds are unfriendly, I have never had a bad experience with a guild or any other interest group I have visited. Maybe we are just friendlier around here.

Kascie

You sound like a very nice person who got taken. Women, I'm sorry to say being one, can sometimes get their eggs mixed in the basket.My first feeling would be to call your best friend in the group and ask. The crime may be so trivial no one can remember. If they still want to make a fuss, start your own group. The gabbing over you only takes about two days, and they'll be after someone else. Be there to help that someone else before the mess starts again.

Cathleen Colson

Our guild has over 300 members and a little more than half attend the monthly meetings. We have a hostess who greets new members and visitors and shows them around. We have 25-30 small quilt groups that meet weekly, or twice a month with different interests - applique, hand quilting, quilted garments, doll making, veterans quilts, charity quilts, art quilts, etc. The small groups help everyone feel connected. We sponsor monthly classes, vary them to accomodate all levels and interests. Same with "block of the month" - simple beginner blocks, paper piecing with great instructions, applique, vintage blocks. Find a friendlier group who really wants to encourage quilting for everyone!

Cookie64

I was in two different guilds and was very active until I was smarted off too just because I was cleaning up so I could get my job done and get home to my sick husband, when some people get the presidents job they let it go to their head and instead of leading they get too bossy. I love being on here with all of you! I have learned a lot.

Cookie

Bamaquilter

I wish we were all close enough to form our own guild, we would have to have more fun than snobs, how can you have a good time with your nose in the air!?!
I've always been made to feel like the odd one out, all through school I seemed to make friends with others that were outsiders.

Eddie

Hi, Q4U,

Sorry you were treated like that. There's just some mean folks in this world who seem to think that the only way to elevate themselves is to put down others. I hope you know your true worth and don't let those people make you think otherwise. :)

As many of you know, my local county guild won't let me join them because I'm a man. They actually have the "no men" exclusion written into their bylaws. Their excuse for this is that years ago a man was disruptive and rude at their meetings, so they decided to just ban men altogether. So, using that logic, I wonder if there had been a black person there that was disruptive, would they have felt comfortable writing into their bylaws that no blacks were allowed to join? Or if the disruptive person were Jewish, would they have felt comfortable writing "No Jews allowed" into their bylaws? I don't mean to diminish in one iota what blacks and Jews have suffered through the years with bigotry and hatred, but when you're on the receiving end of this kind of blatant man-hating bigotry simply because of what sex you were born, it makes me really wonder about these people.

Many of the members of that guild are also members of my church, so I have to also wonder how they reconcile their bigotry with their religion. I guess as long as it's someone else with the problem, it's easier to look the other way.

garysgal

Eddie, It's their loss, not yours! You would be a wonderful asset to any quilt quild. Unfortunately, it is bigotry like that that causes so much trouble everywhere. There was a young man at Jo Anns that was the nicest guy. He knew a lot about sewing and was so helpful. then suddenly he was gone, not sure why, but why it is we think a person's sex determines how talented they are? and just because one man was rude at the guild meeting doesn't mean all of them are. those women can't possibly think they are so perfect, can they?

Old man- New quilter

KWHITE --- If I weren't married, I would think I was in love with you. Yes, I'm a guy AND a quilter. You speak like a real person. My loving wife and I both belong to a guild and they are a bunch of good gals. ( I've even been dubbed an honorary 'sister') However, if I were the brunt of something like what I've been reading, They wouldn't want to hear from this retired sailor.....
For those of you that have this going on in your guild......Tell them Bob said to "stick it" ( to put it mildly)

lacikat

I joined a group 4 yrs. ago because my friend wanted me to, at that time I wasn't a quilter. Of course I was easily intimidated and there were some kind of snooty members, but over the 4 years I have learned to quilt and even the "snooty" ones are right there to help out and answer any questions I have. Next week will be my 4th retreat with the group and we have a great time. I agree a guild can become too large and from time to time we border on that but then the ones that really aren't interested drop out so we have a smaller group (about 25 to 30). Sorry about your experience but everyone on here is super.