Dee

My opinion. Go with the flow and in your heart it will make you happy you could do a kind deed. Also, your labor of love, its okay to keep whats left of the fabric.

Quilted Horse

I agree with Rebecca VLQ. MIL is lonely and just doesn't know it or isn't willing to admit it yet. Maybe the useless stuff would stop or be limited if you had specific times or days you and/or your hubby did stuff with her, even it was seemingly boring and mundane.
AS for the fabric...absolutely have her help pick out the fabric and buy what the pattern says. No harm in you getting a few extra scraps out of the deal. After all you are doing a lot of work and spending alot of time.
Good luck and let us see what the final quilt. I'm sure it will be lovely and appreciated.

audsgirl

I can completely relate! I would buy the fabric the pattern calls for. You never know, you may have a cutting error or something. It's a small price to pay for all the work you will put into this, much less, taking your time away from your own family and your own projects. My sympathies!

Momsmurf

I tend to agree with Rebecca.
It seems an underlying issue is floating "between the lines" here, and that will be for you to iron out. MIL sounds like a lonely lady and maybe even fearful of her future fate watching her mother enter the final stage of life.
If I were in your place I would do as Rebecca suggests....ask your MIL to be part of the quilt process by helping select the fabric. She knows what her mom liked.

Also, might I suggest that when the quilt is given to Grandma, a slightly "big deal" be made in front of the staff - sort of letting people know that it's something special and that the care of it will be done by the family. I would also make sure to take a lot of pictures of it with Grandma...even making sure to take a picture on future visits.

Definitely make sure the Quilt is identifiable in plain English, so the staff realzies that nothing should happen to it.

Saddly, in this day and age, one can't be too trusting.
Enjoy making the quilt and I personally wouldn't expect compensation, no matter what it might cost me. The opportunity to make it for her would be my payment. But that's just me.

rob529

I would buy what the pattern calls for.

lue

She sounds so lonely. Is there a senior center nearby where she can meet some other people. If not, have you tried saying "No, we won't drive over to put in a light bulb or take your groceries out but we will call you on the phone and talk once a day" (if you can spare the time). Loneliness is an awful feeling and I can only imagine how badly she feels having to come up with such feeble excuses to have a little company. That doesn't answer your question but it's what came up for me. Take good care of yourself first, then take care of her.

Annya

We are having the same thing happening to my mum. She is still in hospital at the moment but we will have to start looking for one to take her. My uncle is already in a home and I thought I would make him a scrappy quilt since he has had no hobbies. do you think scrappy will be alright for him.

dharen7

I have worked in long term facility for 28 years. We haven't had quilts made by familys and or hospice volunteers for the hospice residents in our facility disappear and if one did , we found it in laundry, because it was to soiled to wait for family to take home. One of my residents son has made her two quilts he did the simple rail fence for both and tied it in the corners instead of quilting. Both are beautiful.

SHELLEYJACOBSON

If we worried about every quilt we made, they would never leave our hands. Kindness comes back ten fold and even if grandma doesn't know where or who it is from it will make her happy anyway.

Redhead

Use what you have on hand. My suggestion would be to use your BRIGHT, HAPPY fabrics. Things that are cheerful :-)