SuzzyQ

I recently finished a commissioned quilt for my godchild and her husband. He commissioned it for her - to replace the quilt I gave them as a wedding gift 30 years ago. They got dogs about 5 years ago and since the dogs are allowed everywhere, including on the beds, the quilt bit the dust to the point there is not enough left to make a dog bed. So he had me make the one I finally finished last Christmas (=3 Christmas gifts from him to her).
Because it cost him so much (~$1000), he wanted to hang it like a tapestry in their stairwell. I reminded him it was a gift and once a gift is given... it is hers to do with as she wishes.
It is now on their bed and he is not happy. She loves it. He feels she does not see the value in it and the dogs will wreck it in short order.
Honestly, it does not bother me that it is out for the dogs to destroy nearly as much as it would disturb me to know it is hanging on a wall not being used. I make quilts to be used and used up. They are not show quality but I want them to be loved.
So... if he collars me again, what do I say? What would you say?

QuiltingPandaBear

Not your circus, not your monkeys?

If he bought her a gift from a retailer, he wouldn’t be asking them to weigh in if he thought she was misusing the product. Amazon isn’t going to issue a statement support either side of a martial disagreement over how to treat a home goods products and you shouldn’t be asked to do so either.

Chasing Hawk

I can see his point about the quilt, especially the how much was spent on it. Also I see your point point, when a quilt is given to another, it is theirs to do as they see fit.

Perhaps you can suggest what we do:
With our 4 dogs we cover the bed during the day with a sheet or two just in case they manage to sneak in for a nap. My husband has the night shift with the dogs. He wakes up about 3 am lets them out for a potty break. Cover most of the bed with the sheet to cover most of the bedding while I am still sleeping. One or two of the dogs get "Gramma time" and they get to sleep with me in the bed for 3 or 4 hours (husband calls it bonding time).
Or take the quilt off the bed at night as use another well loved quilt or bedspread.

joe'smom

When we had dogs that went on our bed, we covered all the bedding over with a waterproof mattress cover and a top sheet. One obviously has to choose between aesthetics and allowing the dogs on the bed. So his choices are, let the quilt be ruined, cover it up or hang it on the wall. That's what I would tell him.

With respect to the hanging, I would not consider a quilt being hung as 'not be being used.' It is being used in the way he wants to use it, and being appreciated. But advise to hang out of direct light.

Lady Diana

I would never let dogs trear up or use a handmade quilt as a doggie bed.
I have to tell you, THAT IS ONE BEAUTIFUL QUILT!
if your Godchild asks again, I would still make a quilt for him.
he appreciates your talent and time. That is all that matters.
perhaps he can convey its value to his wife.

Stitches23

Why do you think the quilt be not be loved if hung on a wall? I think your godchild would love it very much!

If your godchild commissioned a wall hanging or "tapersty" and you agreed to make it, then he should have gifted it to his wife that way complete with pole to hang it on. I understand you would rather it be used on a bed (dogs or no dogs), but if that makes your godchild unhappy because he realizes the value of it and wanted to cherish the thing that you made him, then it's just sad his wife is very inconsiderate of his feelings and does not appreciate the quilt for what it is.

If you don't care that it's mistreated and will be destroyed soon by the dogs, I can't see why you would take issue making another one. After all, your godchild put $1000 in it. He, on the other hand, may not see the point of another $1000 dog bed and may have to give up on the idea of having something made by you to cherish.

Water under the bridge. They've been married 30 years. It's not likely she'll change.

mkc

It's their relationship. Don't get involved. The only guaranteed result of getting in the middle of it is friction and bad feelings towards you.

QuiltE

Difficult situation!
However, what got my attention was that your God Daughter loves it!
I was prepared to read that she had no interest in the quilt.
Despite the dog issues, I'd take that as a huge win!

Sadly, once we gift a quilt we really have no control.
And in this case, I believe you were paid the $.

As someone else had suggested ... if her husband wanted a wall hanging, then he should have presented it with a hanging rod and installed it right away.

I'd say ... Take the God Daughter win of her loving it ... and politely say no, if you are asked to make another.

P.S. ... loved the quilt when you showed it before ... and all the more, seeing it again!

toverly

Maybe he should let it slip how much it cost. Then she might take better care of it. I made a throw quilt for a friend and they didn't appreciate it until months later when I said that throw size usually costs about $150. That was years ago. They appreciate it now.

Three Dog Night

My opinion is when a quilt becomes the property of someone else it is theirs to love or hang or put in a closet. My DILs apologize for using quilts gifted to them and I tell them it's theirs do with it what you want. Agree maybe if she knew how much he paid for it she might change her mind but she loves it and it makes her happy and he gave it to her to replace one that was on the bed with dogs on it.