DebsShelties

Can you unplug the TV until the room gets done? That would be fair.

jitkaau

You don't need anyone's approval to do the things you love- try not to take it to heart.

Scrappy Gram

Tell him it will be a tax deduction - if you earn income from using your studio in your home, a portion of all home expenses can be deducted as business expenses. Sometimes you can only get a man's attention by mentioning $$$.

Teacup

I agree that you may be struggling with depression with the loss of your brother...I've been there. I've had several significant family losses in the fall and the memory each year and shorter days of sunlight can sometimes get me down. Seeing your unfinished room (your dream) and working in inadequate space is adding to your struggle. I think taking on this project will give you a brighter outlook and something positive that you can do to effect change in your life.

Get proactive, don't wait for him or nag him. You can do this. Make a careful list of what needs to be done. Is the drywall mudded and sanded and ready for paint? If so, it's pretty easy to move forward. (I know my DH detests mudding drywall, that for him, that would stall the project.) If it's not mudded, that's a big job that has to come first. Does the room need baseboards or ceiling boards? Trim around windows/doors? Outlet covers? Curtain rods? Make your list and go to your home improvement store - be sure to take your room measurements and floor plan, and add window and door measurements as well. Get estimates on paint (basecoat and top coat), trim and other items needed for your square footage. Stop to enjoy your process and bring home paint chips of colors that you'd love to incorporate in the room. If you need to get brushes, ladder, drop cloths, etc., add that to your list. Then you'll have a plan.

Talk to hubby with your list in hand, tell him how important it is to move forward with this, and ask if you've overlooked anything on your list. Tell him what it will cost for finish materials and ask if the two of you can tackle it together or would he prefer you get an estimate from a contractor. This is a good time of year to hire someone as many are done with outside building jobs. Then move forward, with or without him. I also agree that if the room is ready to paint, you can probably handle this with a few girlfriends. There's tons of information online on how to tape and paint a room, just cover those floors up and go at it.

You may also want to talk to DH about how you both envision the room to be used since he has claimed ownership of what was to be your space. Will it be your studio or does he want one end for a lounge chair and the TV? Would he prefer another room in the house for the TV so that your noise doesn't bother him? Will you be able to work in your space if he has the TV on -- does he watch shows/movies that you really, really dislike? Can you sew if he's watching his favorite sports, or will he resent the noise? Answers to this these may help you find a compromise.

mar32428

I had a psychology friend explain it to me. Some men are very challenged when they have wives who are talented and start their own businesses. It is their male insecurity that we will become independent and not need them anymore so they undermine what we do. Had the same problem. Finally just said enuf is enuf and sailed ahead. I needed my space and I made sure he had his space too Yes, he was bent out of shape for awhile but I stood my ground.

It finally worked out so go ahead and finish your room anyway you can. You will be so proud of yourself and DH will finally get the message.

mar32428

Another thing, that insecurity also includes " being in charge". We are grown women. They can make us feel like we have to justify everything we do. Not so! If we can start and develop a profitable business, we can stand up and growl. If you don't want to get walked on, get up and get off that rug.

Deb watkins

I love this.....or put on one of your favorite shows or movies and turn up the volume.....after all, machines do make a little noise and you just have to hear the show...If the room was built as a sewing space, then make it so. Remove all of the 'junk' (different definitions for male and female), set up the room as you need it to function as it WAS INTENDED.

Marilyn Philips

Get that TV out of there even if you have to get other help and let him know that your business profits will be put into completing your "place of business" not expenses for running the household. :hunf: :hunf: :hunf:

arimuse

golly, I waited for 10 yrs where we moved to have a sewing room. Finally, this spring, when hibs was on a trip I bought a set of those big glidey casters and moved all the furniture out of a bedroom, all the junk etc, and parked it in a big (they call it a "bonus room" in the southeast) upstairs room he uses. He came home and I told him I was making a sewing rm. and so he started to help, went off again and the next time he came home I was in the middle of tearing down the popcorn ceiling!

Short story - I now have my girl cave for sewing! sharet

so.........just start taking the junk out of your sewing to be rm and dropping it in his spaces and even if you work on it yourself at least it will get done sharet

maryp

go ahead and finish it yourself. if you start on it .he might start helping u. thats what i did with my hubby.i bought some new counters and sink for my kitchen. they set in shed for a month. one day i threw allthe old counters and sink out.he had to put them in then.