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  • How Do You Find Time For Yourself?

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    Old 02-01-2011, 05:05 PM
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    I'm retired from teaching now and still so busy with volunteer activities. I feel guilty when taking even a few minutes for myself (guess thats from my upbringing when women were inferior and doing for yourself was the worst sin)anyway kids are grown, husband has many hobbies, and I can't even watch TV without ironing so its "useful time". HELP!
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    Old 02-01-2011, 05:13 PM
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    Sounds like that is just your personality. I, too, like to keep busy. I am not the type who can sit and do nothing.

    I guess I am no help! Sorry.

    You certainly shouldn't feel guilty for doing things for yourself, though. Take a walk, soak in the tub, make a cake and eat the whole thing! (not really), read a book. Challenge yourself to do something for yourself just 5 minutes each day. It will get easier. You are worth it. :)
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    Old 02-01-2011, 05:24 PM
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    You are an important person and you deserve to take some time for yourself. Take baby steps if necessary. Go for a walk. go to the library, go to thrift stores. Invite someone over for tea or coffee. Read a real good book. Have a facial, get a manicure or a pedicure. Get a new hairstyle. Think of something that makes you happy and just do it. Try to remember that you are not selfish just because you do something for yourself. You will be glad you did.
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    Old 02-01-2011, 06:06 PM
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    Adjusting to retirement is hard. When the kids grow up and leave you have to redefine yourself. I think too often we do so by putting more effort into our work. Then, one day you are sitting at home with no deadlines, schedules and you wonder what your purpose in life is.

    Take your time. It took me several years and then DH retired and I had to redefine myself again. I have learned to sit still. Usually I do handwork or read. But I can actually sit and just think. I've learned to meditate and pray. God will show you ways to have a meaningful life, but at a different pace. PM me and we can discuss more. :-)
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    Old 02-01-2011, 06:28 PM
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    Self care is not self-ish.
    Repeat this 10x every morning while looking in the mirror.

    Set a goal to do one thing each week "just for me", even for 30 minutes, and stick to it. You "practiced" being industrious and care-giving; now you will have to practice self care giving. Some day you'll be doing something just for you and will realize how nice it feels and be glad you took the time to work at it. :-)

    Jan in VA
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    Old 02-01-2011, 06:40 PM
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    Just think of your hobby as useful time. Then maybe you will stop feeling guilty for doing what you love. A happy woman makes for a happy home! Sometimes we have to think about ourselves for a change
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    Old 02-01-2011, 07:27 PM
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    I retired last June and I spend most of my days making quilts. When I find someone I think needs a quilt, I give one to them.
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    Old 02-01-2011, 07:50 PM
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    I have been that way all my life, so perhaps it is a personality thing. My mother would not allow us to have idle time--we always had to be doing something. I'm retired now too and keep busy all the time and basically I am unable to relax and do nothing.
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    Old 02-01-2011, 08:25 PM
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    I think everything I do is for my contentment. I cook, I eat it, I have an apple cake in the oven right now lol...I really do a lot of quilting and other things that I love to do and I can't imagine feeling quilty....oh, I don't iron lol. What is that anyway?

    Since both hubby and I are retired, he shares a lot in the house work and there is all sorts of time now...he spent the whole Sunday in bed watching his favorite shows and only getting up to get eats lol.... I sorted out bins of fabric and got certain bins all organized (fabric of course) Now I have all my C&S in one large bin organized into lights and darks...even that was enjoyable to me.

    I am making two pillows for my friend right now and will post in a thread when I get done.
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    Old 02-01-2011, 10:44 PM
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    I am that way, also. Think any time for myself isn't "productive" because there must be SOMETHING of more importance that needs doing. By almost never taking time for myself & always doing too much for others, & doing work that was too hard for my body, both at work & at home, I have now ruined most of my muscles & joints & have been disabled since age 53. TAKE TIME FOR YOURSELF!!! Even if it's to do absolutely nothing. You'll be better off in the long run & happier, too. Start small, say an hour a day. & work up to 4 hrs a day for yourself. Give up your least favorite volunteer thing. I don't think you'll ever regret it.
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