Feeling left out.
05-01-2010, 07:25 AM
#91
Junior Member
Join Date: Jan 2010
Location: Mountains of Virginia
Posts: 165
I have not tried to join a guild but wanted to join an online group (on another site)to make quilts for the military folks coming back wounded. I read a list of do's and don'ts and was really turned off from joining. Some of the items were common sense, use good quality fabric, OK, make the quilts a certain size, OK, don't use juvenile prints, OK, They like red white and blue, OK makes sense. Pertaining to quilting, don't stitch in the ditch, WHAT? How to prepare your quilt for your long arm quilter, WHAT? Only professional long arm quilting is good enough. This is not what quilting is about. A quilt is to provide a "warm and fuzzy" comfort, it does not need to be perfect. :oops: :oops:
05-01-2010, 07:36 AM
#92
Senior Member
Join Date: Jul 2009
Location: currently in Sioux Falls, SD
Posts: 697
It sounds like they're acting like junior high schoolers! Remember the cliques and groups that would exclude certain people! That's just awful and the people that caused you to feel this way should grow up! WE LIKE YOU!!!
05-01-2010, 07:37 AM
#93
Super Member
Join Date: Jul 2007
Location: Pine Grove, California
Posts: 2,816
Our Guild donates money to charitable groups in the community. That seemed find to me until they announced that they were short of money and decided to raise the dues and the fees for workshops. My personal feeling was that money to charitable groups should come after needs of the guild have been met. I personally didn't like to see dues and fees for workshops raised...... Do any other Guilds contribute money to charitable groups, too? (we also make comfort quilts for different groups but I fully support that idea since it is making quilts!)
05-01-2010, 07:50 AM
#94
Super Member
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Pittsburg, Kansas
Posts: 1,691
Very sorry that happened. I belong to our local guild, and enjoy it and also learn a lot. Nearly all of the girls are friendly and have never heard of anyone feeling left out.
I know there are cliques' in my guild, but I just stay away from them. No one is going to make me feel inferior, as Elanor Roosevelt and her famous saying said. Can't remember the expression right now, but she said it well.
I agree; have someone else join with you and that will help. I believe we can overcome people like that if we just are ourselves and don't expect them to suceed in "running us off."
I also like the quilting board for that reason. Everyone is willing to help us with a problem or answer a question. I have never experienced any rudeness here; everyone seems "family!"
Mariah
I know there are cliques' in my guild, but I just stay away from them. No one is going to make me feel inferior, as Elanor Roosevelt and her famous saying said. Can't remember the expression right now, but she said it well.
I agree; have someone else join with you and that will help. I believe we can overcome people like that if we just are ourselves and don't expect them to suceed in "running us off."
I also like the quilting board for that reason. Everyone is willing to help us with a problem or answer a question. I have never experienced any rudeness here; everyone seems "family!"
Mariah
05-01-2010, 08:30 AM
#97
Junior Member
Join Date: Jun 2009
Posts: 109
Gosh, Here I go again...with my philosophy about certain groups. Not all guilds are unfriendly, but when you are the one who is dissed (as the young say), it can hurt. The definition of a guild was a group where you served an apprenticeship until your skills were good enough to be accepted. You were then a member of a closed society, one with membership requirements and certain skill levels.
Here's what I find so ironic about these unfriendly guilds. In one that is near my city, the beginners, the muddlers, and others far outnumber the advanced quilters. Most of the so-called skilled quilters are what I call the "chump change Claras" (with apologies to anyone named Clara!) whose only employment seems to be at Hancock's or Jo-Ann's or small quilt shops earning minimum wages. Their attitude often shows when they bully the elderly who come in for their free monthly quilt pattern.
One last peeve of mine...the endless and boring business meetings that guilds make you sit through. The financial reporting requirements of guilds is another downer. Who wants to deal with this stuff when all you want to do is learn new techniques and gather inspiration from other's ideas. Oh yes, one must jump right in and volunteer for some of these thankless tasks, only to have some narrow-minded but overweight bully criticize your efforts.
Look for another group, one that is welcoming to newcomers. You may find some women and men who share your quilting philosophy. Hang in there!
Here's what I find so ironic about these unfriendly guilds. In one that is near my city, the beginners, the muddlers, and others far outnumber the advanced quilters. Most of the so-called skilled quilters are what I call the "chump change Claras" (with apologies to anyone named Clara!) whose only employment seems to be at Hancock's or Jo-Ann's or small quilt shops earning minimum wages. Their attitude often shows when they bully the elderly who come in for their free monthly quilt pattern.
One last peeve of mine...the endless and boring business meetings that guilds make you sit through. The financial reporting requirements of guilds is another downer. Who wants to deal with this stuff when all you want to do is learn new techniques and gather inspiration from other's ideas. Oh yes, one must jump right in and volunteer for some of these thankless tasks, only to have some narrow-minded but overweight bully criticize your efforts.
Look for another group, one that is welcoming to newcomers. You may find some women and men who share your quilting philosophy. Hang in there!
05-01-2010, 08:43 AM
#98
Super Member
Join Date: May 2009
Posts: 7,741
Originally Posted by Quilt4u
Funny thing I have been with them fo 5 years now And was never traeted this way . Then this year Well what can I say. Just time to move on. Guilds like this Give outhers a bad name
I am with two guilds and if they were to treat me this way I would move on and know that all people and quilters are not like this. So sorry for this sad experience you have gone through. You deserve to be treated with kindness and love.... just like this quilting board does. :-) HUGS all the way around.
05-01-2010, 09:10 AM
#100
Senior Member
Join Date: Feb 2008
Location: Dallas, TX
Posts: 368
Originally Posted by QBeth
Depending upon the day and my mood, I can have a very perverse sense of humor. Given that type of treatment, I'd show up the at the next meeting, walk in boldly right up to the offenders, with a big "How ya doing tonight, ladies? SO good to see you again! You know, I think I'll just sit right down here with you so we can catch up. What's new?"
They'd either have to get up and move OR talk to me, one way or the other. Power mongers and bullies are, at heart, cowards and don't like to have someone shine the light on their behavior. At least, that's my experience. My advice is to get right back in their face!
They'd either have to get up and move OR talk to me, one way or the other. Power mongers and bullies are, at heart, cowards and don't like to have someone shine the light on their behavior. At least, that's my experience. My advice is to get right back in their face!
I went to another guild that is closer to home three times and it was not a fun experience even though there were some of the same people there. Only one person that I didn't know actually talked to me on one visit, the 3rd and last. she was very nice and was sitting in the next chair. Would rather spend this time quilting!
Just shop around and enjoy yourself. Life is way to short to accept being treated badly or worse, not at all!
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