Should I be santa

Old 12-22-2010, 07:03 AM
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My ex husband has been out of work for almost 3 years. He informed my youngest son (which lives with him) that he would not be able to buy christmas for him and his step brother. My heart sank for both my ex and my son. My heart says take money out of my savings and give it to my ex without my son knowing, but my head says hes a jerk dont you dare he could have had a job years ago had he looked for one. I pay child support to my ex its not court odered because I have custody, its just my sons decision to live there. So its not like he doesnt have income, he has a working wife and was drawing unemployment. Sometimes I hate having a heart.
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Old 12-22-2010, 07:06 AM
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No dont be Santa through your ex.....if you feel your child needs more presents, then you get them for him directly. If your ex felt your child NEEDED presents, he would do the same. It's a ploy.
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Old 12-22-2010, 07:10 AM
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BTW, please dont buy presents out of savings. This Christmas thing is crazy. Think about this. Can your child name all the major presents he received last year, where they are at now, and the last time they were used?
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Old 12-22-2010, 07:13 AM
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I would follow my heart, but I agree that I would give the gifts directly. You will do a better job shopping anyway.
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Old 12-22-2010, 07:16 AM
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Sounds like he might be playing you a little. be careful, but also listen to your heart. Merry Christmas
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Old 12-22-2010, 07:23 AM
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He is laying a quilt trip on you, don't go for it. Buy more presents if you want your child to have more, but you give them to him. I'm a grandparent, I try to get my children and grands everything they are really wanting , and grandpa is really a soft touch. I've noticed quite often I "hear" how much the grands need or want something but they just can't afford it, and before I know it, we are buying. Then they go out to dinner or do something that is totally unneccessary. My husband and I didn't go out at all when our kids were little, not even for special occassions, and dinner out just because was unheard of. But our kids had plenty. Don't get me wrong, my kids don't ask us to buy for the grandchildren, and probably don't even realize what they are doing when they mention things like that, but we pick up on it and do. I'm getting a little tighter with what I do( notice I said a little,LOL), but grandpa ? That's another story!!
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Old 12-22-2010, 07:32 AM
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Clem55 you said quilt trip insead of guilt trip, too funny!
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Old 12-22-2010, 07:36 AM
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I've finally discouraged my local moocher. She's been a burr under my saddle for 50 years and YAHHHH. She found out she has more 'stuff' than a flea market and I don't. I pay my bills first, even if I have to do it in payments. I'd love a trip or restrurant evening. But, I also stay in my health guidelines that way no emergencies. Some folks are just born moochers. And another thing, being poor is a state of mind. Quilters are loving, giving and so special. I'm sure we have a neon light blinking somewhere on our person that says 'SUCKER'. Aren't we wonderful?!?

Blessings,
Ruth
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Old 12-22-2010, 07:42 AM
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I agree with everyone, don't take money out of your savings to give to your ex husband, give/buy something for your son, and I think seamstome is right, ask him how much he's used or played with the last gifts he received.
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Old 12-22-2010, 07:48 AM
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How old is your son ? is he old enough to understand that there is no Santa ? Maybe it is time that son realizes some truths about Dad - hard as that may be . Son will have Christmas with you , so its not like he won't have anything .
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