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Thread: Acceptable or tacky?

  1. #1
    Power Poster BellaBoo's Avatar
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    Acceptable or tacky?

    A group I belong to had it's Christmas party yesterday. We have Secret Santa. This year a lady I don't know that well was my Secret Santa. My gift was a hardback book of a best seller. I noticed the jacket cover looked like it had been handled a lot. Like it had been the first one on the shelf that everyone picked up and thumbed through. When she asked me if I liked the book I said yes, I have been wanting to read the book. She said it was very good. She said she bought it for me and then decided to read it and then her DH read it and then her son. I have never read the actual book I bought for a gift before and never thought about doing so much less letting it be passed around before giving. Is this common? I head her tell another person her son watched the DVDs she bought for gifts and she wished he would hurry up and finish so she could get them wrapped. I think this is tacky. DH said it didn't harm the book to be read first. No but to me it wasn't a gift, it was more like
    'you want this book, I'm finished with it.'
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  2. #2
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    yeah, kinda tacky, but enjoy the book anyway. She's not a close friend and... don't let it get you down. Just know this isn't how you gift or want to be gifted. Takes all kinds--

  3. #3
    Senior Member RonieM's Avatar
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    Tacky, tacky, tacky!! It is truly amazing what some people see as acceptable. Try to enjoy the book anyway.

  4. #4
    Senior Member MissSandra's Avatar
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    that was so very tacky of her she might as well gone to good will and bought a book and gave it to you.
    how sad.
    Warm Regards,
    Sandra

  5. #5
    Super Member MaryMo's Avatar
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    I agree that this is tacky ... re-gifting a used item ..... would she (and her family) wear clothes before gifting them? If this happens to her, would she see it as tacky? Chalk it up to uncouth person and enjoy reading the book.

  6. #6
    Power Poster BellaBoo's Avatar
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    I have started reading the book and when I done I'll give it back to her and say I'm finished reading the book, you may know someone that didn't get a chance to read it before you gave it to me. Yeah, I'm that type of person! LOL
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  7. #7
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    Quote Originally Posted by BellaBoo View Post
    I have started reading the book and when I done I'll give it back to her and say I'm finished reading the book, you may know someone that didn't get a chance to read it before you gave it to me. Yeah, I'm that type of person! LOL
    That would be very funny! LOL

  8. #8
    Super Member Sunnie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by BellaBoo View Post
    I have started reading the book and when I done I'll give it back to her and say I'm finished reading the book, you may know someone that didn't get a chance to read it before you gave it to me. Yeah, I'm that type of person! LOL
    I like that. LOL
    Sunnie
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  9. #9
    Junior Member quilter1942's Avatar
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    I think it is tacky.I go to 2 groups for quilting and 1 is wonderful you get quilting and sewing gifts.(yesterday I got 1 of the large plastic organizers and a bottle of Best Press) the other we have brought it up several times about quilting or sewing gifts,some people still give tacky stuff like plastic picture frames and 1 year I got a snow man kit which had the $1.00 sticker from the dollar store.I give quilting/sewing from a quilt shop or Joanns etc.We are supposed to bring a $10.00 gift.This will probally be the last time I will particapate.

  10. #10
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    Wow! Would be diferrent if it was a white elephant exchange or she was extremely poor but to buy gifts, read or watch them first! Yikes! I do buy used books for a few friends but we talked about it first!! Books can get expensive!!
    I love your return comment!!! Lol!!!

  11. #11
    Power Poster BellaBoo's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by quilter1942 View Post
    1 year I got a snow man kit which had the $1.00 sticker from the dollar store.
    Now that is just plain gross slap in the face!
    Why do people join groups if they don't care enough to put some thought and effort into it? That's why I don't do swaps unless there is a minimum value rule. High value doesn't mean high cost, that's the fun for me. To find great value for little money. I am part or four Secret Santas this year and the gifts I bought/made are:

    1. Moda Christmas fabric bought last Jan. on clearance (regular 8.99 a yard, marked to $3) and using my Go cut out enough 6 1/2" tumbler blocks to make a queen size quilt top! I bought a nice hat box on clearance for $3 to hold the kit. Cost out of pocket for me- $27 for 8 yards of beautiful fabric plus box.

    2. A small Tiffany style reading lamp bought at Lowe's on clearance last spring for $8, regular price $49, Ott bulb on clearance online for $11 regular $39 and free shipping. $19 of of pocket cost.


    3. A pretty box full of homemade coffee cake, scones, biscotti, and muffins. Cost: ? Ingredients in my pantry.

    4. A large fabric bowl made from cotton clothesline and wrapped in scraps from the above Moda fabric, filled with bath products from Body Works. Cost $16 for the cotton rope and $40 for the bath products. I saved enough $ on the other gifts, I bought the bath products at regular price. Out of pocket cost $56.
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  12. #12
    Super Member Crqltr's Avatar
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    I agree .. It is tacky. I stopped the exchanging of gifts because of stuff like this. It takes all the fun out of it. The least she could have done is not tell you everyone read it and let you think it was the last one on the shelf!,

  13. #13
    Super Member ptquilts's Avatar
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    You could have said, Oh I am glad so many people had a chance to read it before you gave it to me. Giving something NEW as a gift is so over-rated, isn't it?

  14. #14
    Super Member Maggiemay's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by quilter1942 View Post
    I think it is tacky.I go to 2 groups for quilting and 1 is wonderful you get quilting and sewing gifts.(yesterday I got 1 of the large plastic organizers and a bottle of Best Press) the other we have brought it up several times about quilting or sewing gifts,some people still give tacky stuff like plastic picture frames and 1 year I got a snow man kit which had the $1.00 sticker from the dollar store.I give quilting/sewing from a quilt shop or Joanns etc.We are supposed to bring a $10.00 gift.This will probally be the last time I will particapate.
    I have gotten several "dollar store" type gifts at gift exchanges. I would always go out of my way to buy something nice & on sale for $10 & inevitably would end up with the plastic picture frame. I belong to a group with an optional gift exchange- if you bring one, you take one- & I have stopped doing that too.

    Passing around the book before she gave it to you is defiantely tacky & thinking that was ok was tackier!

  15. #15
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    In life, there some things worth making a fuss over and some things that are not worth the effort. In my opinion, this is one of the things that fall into the 'not worth the effort' category - but is fun to think about for a few minutes.

  16. #16
    Power Poster BellaBoo's Avatar
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    I wasn't upset just thought how selfish and tacky to do that and to let others know you did it! It makes you wonder what else you don't know about them. Imagine her son thinking it is okay to buy a gift you want and get the use out of it first and then passing it along.

    And then think people just like this may be running big companies or get voted in office, teaching in school, serving on community and business boards ........
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  17. #17
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    Very tacky! If I wanted to read a book I had purchased for a gift I would....and then I would buy a brand new one for my exchange gift!

  18. #18
    Super Member nannyrick's Avatar
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    Definately TACKY. That is not giving.
    so many quilts to make, so little time.

  19. #19
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    Very tacky unless it was supposed to be a used item. I could never consider doing what she did. And to think she seemed to be bragging about it.
    Sorry this happened to you.

    Kat

  20. #20
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    NOT classy at all.
    Linda

  21. #21
    Super Member Sheila_H's Avatar
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    Wow that is definitely tacky - it's almost like she forgot that she had to do a Santa gift exchange and just decided to grab something out of her house and wrapped it as a gift.

  22. #22
    Super Member luvTooQuilt's Avatar
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    Its amazing how she doesn't realize how rude it was to 'share' your gift...

    Id be afraid to have her bring me lunch one day.. For the fear she'd take a bite out of it !!

  23. #23
    Power Poster Jingle's Avatar
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    Very tacky. My oldest Daughter use to work with a lady that sent out Christmas cards she had received. when she needed a gift for someone she would go through her house and pick something she no longer wanted. Taking tacky to a much lower level.
    Another Phyllis
    This life is the only one you get - enjoy it before you lose it.

  24. #24
    Senior Member EmbQuilt's Avatar
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    Totally tacky! But made me laugh

  25. #25
    Junior Member luey0202's Avatar
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    I too think very tacky.....

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