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Thread: A different take on Enough Already

  1. #1
    np3
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    This is not what I was expecting. Nothing was said about her going into debt so I have to believe that a lot of this was donated. And it was for a good cause. Volunteers were helping her. How did it get like this?

    Why didn't the daughter invite her to come over instead of complaining about the mess? Everyone in that house could have helped with the organization. Why didn't they show the rest of the house? Was it because it wasn't a mess?

    The garage was a mess with personal things, sporting goods, decorations, luggage. Why wasn't the husband keeping it clean? Most husbands are capable of putting in shelves and cupboards in a garage for storage.

    If she was buying, storing and not using, I might have felt the problem was hers. But she was very active in making quilts for a very special purpose. I blame the family and the volunteers. JMHO

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    Power Poster Sadiemae's Avatar
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    They never give enough information to let you know why and how things happen. Anything is possible.

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    I know, right. NOthing against Peter either, that is his career, organizer. But I was seriously talking back tot he tv to her daughter and hubby and giving comfort to her. Sometimes, when your heart is into a charity, you do all you can. I am that way with PL. I have to put things up each time I work on PL because it is their fabric and donated. Keep it separated. NOw other chapters have her fabric she collected. When you make a lot of quilts, you can go thru the fabric there in no time.
    I think we just watched it to see the fabric. She needed help to organize and now she can keep it up. The garage could have held the extra fabric given away, and she could have had a corner in the LR. Wonder why they didn't show her other rooms?????

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    np3
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    Good point on the garage. They treated it like she had an addiction and limited her on fabric space. It would have held all of the donated fabric. There was all this space left. And I'm sorry but the dust will get under that door when the wind blows. Not where I would want to quilt. The lighting over the bins looked good but what about where she will work? And temperature control? Plug-ins?

    (Sorry Peter)

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    Super Member glenda5253's Avatar
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    It wasn't what I expected either. When they casually mentioned at the beginning of the show that she is actively involved in Quilts of Valor, that takes it from a hoarder situation to a situation of a giving, loving person involved in her charity and perhaps needing to learn to say "No" more often. The clutter could be tamed with help from family and co-members supporting "Mom" and stepping in with ideas and solutions.

    Of course then that way she would not have gotten that quilting space to die for with all the shelving, cabinetry, etc. :lol: :lol: :lol:

    I was also waiting to see the rest of the house...never happened so what conclusions can you draw from that. :roll:

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    Power Poster MadQuilter's Avatar
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    My MIL has a - well, for lack of a better term - a bunch of shit! No, I'm not gonna sugar coat - it's crap. She supposedly "wanted" to sell the stuff at a yard sale but she had her prices so overpriced that people laughed at her. So she got a monthly storage unit. That one was not big enough so she got a bigger unit and her husband built shelves to house the crap and make it accessable. At the same time she complains about not having any money. I don't think I need to continue the story. It 's a mind set that the person with the crap often can't or won't see and if the family members want contact, they sometimes have to shut up.

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    np3
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    Good point Glenda5253. I don't consider her a hoarder at all.

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    Senior Member Tilladare's Avatar
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    I think what made me the saddest, was the idea that she was relegated to working alone in the garage now if she wants to continue quilting. That area looked so sterile and uninspiring.
    If my child said those things to me, and/or pushed for me to be involved in a show like that I would have told her flat out, do not expect to be invited over often, as every time I look at you from now I will remember what you put me through

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    Senior Member Momof3Es's Avatar
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    My mom and I watched it together. I was also waiting to see the rest of the house. I just wanted to cry when she had to give up all of that fabric and quilts that were already cut and ready to put together. Somewhere else someone said that they don't have sales like they do in Clean House where do they get the money for the redoing of the garage??

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    np3
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    Quote Originally Posted by Momof3Es
    My mom and I watched it together. I was also waiting to see the rest of the house. I just wanted to cry when she had to give up all of that fabric and quilts that were already cut and ready to put together. Somewhere else someone said that they don't have sales like they do in Clean House where do they get the money for the redoing of the garage??
    The closet people probably donated it for the advertisement.

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    Senior Member pdcakm's Avatar
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    yes, there is a difference between a hoarder and a disorganized person, or a person who just became overwhelmed. just because you have a lot of stuff doesn't necessarily mean you are a hoarder. sounds like this lady was using the stuff, it was just coming in faster than she could use it.

    i don't like these programs because the host often goes in with it in mind that they know what is going on but in fact do not. their mind is already made up based on their perceptions. the outcome is not always the best for the people they are trying to help.

    i did not see this show but imagine that he did his usual "you must limit to save your family" without any thought to how it got that way in the first place or has the family ever done anything to help her. sounds like her need to do this volunteer job got out of hand. maybe this will allow her to not take on so much next time. sure hope so.

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    Super Member justflyingin's Avatar
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    Is there any way to see this show on line for someone who lives overseas?

  13. #13
    np3
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    Quote Originally Posted by justflyingin
    Is there any way to see this show on line for someone who lives overseas?
    Not that I know of.

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    I feel so bad for the tv lady. Did you see all the kids? They could have easily helped her instead of fussing. HOnestly.
    LOL. Another guild member's son told her when she died it all went to junk. She changed her will and now the guild gets everything. Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhhhh

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    Quote Originally Posted by np3
    Quote Originally Posted by justflyingin
    Is there any way to see this show on line for someone who lives overseas?
    Not that I know of.
    Maybe google Oprah OWN and see if it is available online.

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    Power Poster MadQuilter's Avatar
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    I think it's hard for any of us to have an idea of what is REALLY going on with the family and I don't think we can even form an opinion because we don't know the whole story. If the family dynamics is messed up, they need to sort it out and fix their relationships.

    Sorry, but a "living room" that is filled to the rafters with bags of fabric IS a problem, no matter what charitable organization is SUPPOSED to be the recipients.

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    Sounds like it was also more of a family thing because the daughter said she spent so much time on Quilts for Valor and not on the family.
    And........I think the only reason the board members wanted to watch it was to see the fabric they advertised about. 2000 lbs. YOu are right, we can't judge a book by it's cover.

  18. #18
    Super Member quilterella's Avatar
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    I googled The Hoarder, and it came up, so you can watch selected episodes. I looked around for about 10 minutes on the A&E network (that is another option).

  19. #19
    MTS
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    Quote Originally Posted by justflyingin
    Is there any way to see this show on line for someone who lives overseas?
    Here's a few minutes:
    http://www.oprah.com/own-enough-alre...lts-of-Valor_1

  20. #20
    Senior Member lisalisa's Avatar
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    I saw it and thought right away that she was just dis-organized and cha-ching she is sitting on a gold mine.

    I was really taken back how they treated her. Quilters are the most selfless, loving, giving people I've ever known and there they were talking to her like some spoiled self-indulgent lazy child.

    Anyone think she's secretly a member of the QB? Come on out girl, we support you. Take back the living room. Send the family to the garage!

  21. #21
    Super Member mommamac's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by MadQuilter
    I think it's hard for any of us to have an idea of what is REALLY going on with the family and I don't think we can even form an opinion because we don't know the whole story. If the family dynamics is messed up, they need to sort it out and fix their relationships.

    Sorry, but a "living room" that is filled to the rafters with bags of fabric IS a problem, no matter what charitable organization is SUPPOSED to be the recipients.
    I totally agree - we don't know if/how the children tried to intervene in the past. We don't know what is in those other rooms ~ perish the thought! I'm thinking this lady uses her charity quilting as an excuse & is in denial. Husband was quite submissive & I felt daughter was justified in her feelings - the 'message' she got was family is not important if you don't have a place for us to sit & visit.


    My husband's reaction - "you're not going to get like that are you?" lol

  22. #22
    Super Member raedar63's Avatar
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    I agree that the family could have helped with organization, it was obvious that it was not dirty and there were lots and lots of beautiful quilts being produced. There was plenty of room left to organize the fabric that was given away.I didn't think they really looked into her heart.

  23. #23
    Super Member Candace's Avatar
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    Any hobby, past time, volunteer group that comes between you and your family is a problem. No matter how you look at it. Her child and grandchildren were going without their grandmother because of some fabric held together by thread. Yes, the organization she quilts for is a good cause. Her family is a better cause.

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    I agree the living room needed cleaned out or organized. What part of the country was she in. I couldn't move my stuff to the garage unless it was heated (pricey) and sealed better. But, at least she does have a place to quilt now and a place for her family again.

  25. #25
    np3
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    Quote Originally Posted by Candace
    Any hobby, past time, volunteer group that comes between you and your family is a problem. No matter how you look at it. Her child and grandchildren were going without their grandmother because of some fabric held together by thread. Yes, the organization she quilts for is a good cause. Her family is a better cause.
    An interesting thought. I hate to think that my relationship with my grandchildren depends on the condition of my house. I can go to their house, or take little ones to the park, attend their sports events or out to eat. Lots of things can be done. Not everyone has a nice big house for entertaining family. We go where there is enough room, depending on the size of the group at the time. My mother never cooked, baked, or had family events at her home. She still managed to have great times with her grandkids and her great grandkids. And if they live in LA, there are 11 months out of the year when you can entertain in the back yard. There was more going on here (or not going on here) than we will ever know.

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