jlwheart

You're so right, paying attention to who you're giving what to is really important. I've got a sister who doesn't like patterns or bright colors. She loves the anniversary gift I gave her - an ecru afghan. No quilts for her! Her hubby got a fleece throw with bears on it. He said now that's something he can really use. Him, I'll make a quilt for! LOL

Rose_P

It's great to see this good advice expressed so well here. We've seen far too many posts from people who have been hurt by the reception their carefully created gift received. For lots of people, if it's not the current thing on TV or at Anthropologie, it's just not what their hearts desire, no matter what. Some of us grew up in an era when the giver had to come up with gift ideas by carefully observing the giftee and asking subtle questions, but most of the younger people we know are used to the idea of gift registries for every special occasion. People who grew up in families where the parents were divorced have often had to come up with gift ideas for the non-custodial parent because it would be hard to know what the child had or didn't have, and sizes, etc. Miss Manners doesn't seem to approve of gift registries, but they are the norm these days. Some people act as if a present that they didn't choose is just an inconvenience that will have to be exchanged, and if it's handmade, that's a big problem!

As for the situation that Bearisgray describes, would it be rude to give a quilt with the stipulation that when she's tired of it, you would like to have it back? Perhaps you could even put some sort of label on the back with a funny little verse expressing the idea that "When nobody in this house loves me any more, I need to go back where I was born? Please call..."

katesnanna

Ignorance is Bliss as the saying goes. As Latrinka said, don't take the hint. If she asks outright just say you couldn't put that much work into something that will be sold or given away in a couple of years. If she gets offended that is her problem, not yours. You know you wouldn't be happy making something that won't be appreciated.

luvTooQuilt

My mom is the same way- she changes her decor all the time. the couch is one way and then next time we visit its on the opposite side.. Paintings and nicknacks are swapped out, moved and changed all the time. but I give her a lot of credit, my quilts are always there.. they may not be on the bed all the time, but she pulls them out when needed for them or family members... So dont give up on her just yet Peckish...