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When my kids were little and fought over match box cars, and I was driving, I would have them hand it to me. I would throw it out the window! Now nobody could fight over it. I only had to do that maybe 2 times, but they needed to learn either get along or it is gone. I have 3 boys.
When they got older, they had to respect each others things. If they broke or took something, they had to replace or give it back. DS #1 failed 2 classes in his 7th grade year by 2 points. WHY? He wouldn't do his homework! He got a job doing hay work and had to help pay for his summer courses. We didn't fail, he did, and he learned real quick that it all costs something. We weren't being too hard, we were teaching them that either the play by the rules or they have to pay. Middle son got caught with cigs on school property. He had to go to court and had to pay $162 fine. He paid it, not us. He didn't do that again! None of our boys have ever been in real trouble, they work and understand that in life you have to take responsibility for you actions. You did the right thing as far as I am concerned. |
You did the right thing. An 8 year old does understand about money, but why was he so angry? Family may need to show him acceptable ways of dealing with emotions.
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i think you did the right thing i do the same thing with my boys good job.. maybe next time he will stop to think what is this going to cost me..
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Originally Posted by Willa
I think you did great. If your family gives you flack maybe you could ask them how they would feel if you broke something of importance of theirs, on purpose, just because you were mad. Would they expect you to pay for a replacement or would they just shrug their sholders and say oh well. Children need to learn everyone has choices. Those choices have consequences which can be positive, or as in your case, negative.
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I agree you did the right thing. I did the same thing with my son when he threw away something of his brothers out of anger. Only I made him go to the bank, withdraw the money from his account, go to the store, and replace the toy himself, even to the point of handing it over and apologizing. I am sorry your family thought you were too harsh. I think you were not harsh at all and hopefully he learned a lesson.
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Heres a couple questions for ya, were the children at your house? were the children in your care and custody at the time of the anger outburst that resulted in the toy being broke?
If this offence was done in your home or while the children were in your care then it is your choice as to punishment for the actions the child took. However.... When my children are at my house, and in my care they are MY responsibility. If one of my children were to break a toy that belonged to one of the other children whether I got them that toy or another member of the family or even a stranger did, it would be MY place to deal with it in a manner that I seen fit. NOT the person who got the child the toy or another member of the family that might have been around at the time. Or heard about the situation of their "gift" at a later date! |
A mollycottled child turns into a spoild rotten adult. Who needs them.
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My 5 yo broke a head band same thing I made him pay for it. My mom made him pay they need to learn this is not ok. Just because he is an 8yo does not mean he has no consiquences (sp?) He will remember this my son does and has not broken any of his sisters things since.
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My late husband was a corrections officer in a prison. He said that 90% of the inmates were there because they would not take responsibility for their actions. I think you did the right thing....keep up the good work. :thumbup:
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I think you did the right thing. If the parents don't teach him and it sounds like they don't/won't, then who will? All children have to be taught what is right or wrong or what is acceptable behavior, and what he did, isn't acceptable.
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