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-   -   Good Marriages (https://www.quiltingboard.com/general-chit-chat-non-quilting-talk-f7/good-marriages-t111371.html)

alaskasunshine 04-01-2011 10:13 AM

1.When your husband calls don't put him on hold, take his call above ALL others.
2.Friends will come and go. Your husband is forever.
I had a friend that I would visit with when my husband would go away for work. I would not see friends when he was home. This was MY choice not his doing. I figured he was gone either 1 or 2 weeks and when he was home I did not want others to come before him. I love him and I wanted to be with him and do things together. Any way back to the friend, she said tha last time I saw her that she did not like it when my husband was home from work cuz she and I didn't do anything together. She said "he gets in the way of our friendship" I told her I was so sorry but he always comes first and I can do what ever when he is away. I never saw her again. She was very upset that I would not goof around with her when he was home. From that I really saw how important it is to stick closely to your husband and friends truly come and go.

3.It is so important to say I love you often.

4.Pray at least in the evenings together, and if need be on the phone together.

5. We made a covenant with God when we married.

6.The things you love about your man is often what you also do no like. Example: I lock up every door and window before bed. My sweetie could go to bed with everything opened. Once he did go to bed with the front door wide opened, when I woke up in the middle of the night I was freaked out. The next morning I told him about the door and his reply was "oh I guess I forgot to lock it. Heck he didn't even close the door :lol:

6.Embrace each other daily and kiss. I still find my husband very handsome and very sexy after all these years! We will be celebrating 35 years next year.

7. you can be happy or you can be right :lol: :wink: :?

Julianna 04-01-2011 10:21 AM

Separate vacations. This has worked for us for 42 years.

QuiltinPaws 04-03-2011 02:03 PM

The only time divorce is an option is if your spouse is physically or mentally abusive - or a child molester. Also, never side with ANYONE else, parents or siblings, against your spouse. Work it out in private. Pick your battles. How important is this "thing" whatever the argument is about, in the scheme of your entire life. Treat each other with respect. Back when I got married, divorce was not an option. Commitment was made, and each person had a choice with how they would behave. I treated him the way I would a best friend. Everyone argues. Try to end the argument so that you both win. Even if you have to postpone making a decision over something for a while.

One of the best things I have learned is to have a meeting of two. Set aside 5 minutes for the person with the issue to talk. The other person is not to say a word during that 5 minutes. When the first person is finished, the other one clarifies, repeats back what the first person said and then responds. NO belittling, or disrespect. It must be a safe place to talk. If you can't reach an agreement then you table the discussion until another time when you can think about it, get more info. or what ever else you need. In a few days you revisit the issue. Sometimes there is no good answer and sometimes you have to agree not to do it at all.
I am working on my first 50 years with this man that I married at 17. It hasn't been easy. His family still does a lot to try and break us up. I will say that my Mother-in-law always treated me well and we were friends until she died. Once we were married she was kind. FIL and BIL felt I took DH away from them.


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