Reading how many of you have been married for a really long time ... made me wonder ...
If you were to give advice to the younger generations that so easily divorce these days ... (if they were to ask ...) on how to make their marriages work ....what will it be?

make sure you spend 10 min alone (if you know what I mean) with your spouse EVERY day. It keeps the souls attached. Realize that your spouses happiness cant rest souly (sp) on your shoulders, they have to do something for themselves that makes them happy. Mine is quilting, his is antique cars.

I remember Edie Gorma (sp?) and Steve Lawrence saying on Johnny Carson one night (yes, I am old!)...their successful marriage was due to the fact they never had a serious conversation about anything.

Take a long hard look at your self, be honest; take responsibility for your part.
Don't forget what you found attractive in the first place.
Let some things go; who cares if you do something better, if he does it. let him do it & be happy he did it.

I had a disasterous first marriage-but I've been married almost 20 years now, and still sooo happy! I think it's important that both of you give-without keeping track, and saying "I love you" often, and keeping a sense of humor as much as possible. Don't sweat the small stuff-or the big stuff. Let things go! We've weathered a lot of stuff in 20 years-including losing everything he worked for when he sold his business to his druggie son-enough to destroy any marriage. . .but we worked together, accepted the loss and eight years later, we're as strong as ever.

Be best friends first and foremost.

Other things seem to vary by couple ;-) DH and I like doing everything together - DH got me into aerobatics and I got him into autocross, pipe band and horses etc. One of the main reasons for the demise of my first marriage was that we did not do enough together, whereas other couples I know of have almost no shared interests but still stay successfully married.

patience lots of patience and a sense of humor and talk to each other about how you feel guess I know a little been married 50 years in Dec oh and love has a lot to do with it :wink:

Some one told me that no marriage is 50/50. Sometimes it is 90/10 or 20/80 or...............Sometimes you carry the load and sometimes he carries the load. Just realize it for what it is and move on.

Remember to keep the "romance" alive. I packed my hubbys' lunch almost every day for 30 years and I always put something in there to let him know I was thinking of him. He never said much about that little item or saying but one day I forgot. He asked me when he got home where it was...........little things can mean volumes.

Going on 34 years and he is my best friend. I think remembering life always has it's ups and downs. Never make a final choice on the down swing...for this to shall pass.

I ask my self this one question, "do you want to be right? or do you want to be happy?"

and finally...a belief that you are married to the best person in the world...makes you married to the best person in the world.

and second finally...a good belly laugh each day together!

I agree with everything above but also for us having God in our lives makes a big differece. Also when things get tough put. Yourself in the otheR persons shoes. And...... Don't go into it with the attitude.... If it doesn't work I can always get a divorce! Most ppl who have been married a long time will tell you even when things got tough they didn't just throw in the towel so easiLy.
Good luck!!!