Thank you or no thank you?
12-15-2010, 03:55 PM
#31
Power Poster
Join Date: Mar 2009
Posts: 15,639
Originally Posted by dream56
I would send a thank you with words of encouragment for a healthy recovery. These may be items she wasn't useing and sometimes its times like this that make us think about cleaning out the unnecessary items instead of leaving them for someone else to do if the worst does happen.
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12-15-2010, 05:01 PM
#33
Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 342
I think she is scared and I don't know what kind of outlook the Doctors gave her for the news, when she was diagnosed. If she is alone with no one really close by, she is reaching out. Don't be afraid to call her.Just knowing some one cares enough to give her some time on the phone, from time to time, will reassure her some cares. To not acknowledge her at all, would leavings no one cared at all! When you get older and then have illnesses and diseases , that are life threatening, its not I will just go to sleep and old age will take me, is scary to any one of any age!And loneliness and depression sets in making things worse. Keeping in touch and letting her talk or express and maybe giving words of encouragement is treatments out there will lift her spirits. Try to get her to talk about happy times. It can make a world of difference to her, and ease her fears, to know some one is there , even if it on the phone, giving them some time because they care!
12-15-2010, 05:11 PM
#34
Senior Member
Join Date: Mar 2010
Posts: 342
I just lost my Mom in May. She was depressed and tho she had a great gift of beleiving in THE LORD, as the time grew closer her fear,became more pronounced she would die , and no one cared. I took care of her 24/7. So I know the thoughts they have, I also lost my Dad in 1992 my 4 brthers and 2 of my own children. Depression and lonliness itself will shorten a life span without any other underlying cause!!
12-15-2010, 07:41 PM
#35
Super Member
Join Date: Mar 2009
Location: Central Washington State
Posts: 5,997
speaking as one who has lived quite a long time on this earth, and well aware of the fact that my days are finite:
There comes a time in life when we decide what we will and may not be able to accomplish between now and the "going home" day.
Which would be more beneficial to me and my family -- to burden them with all of my stuff (and, maybe foment argument) or start presenting my possessions to others who might get better use out of them.
As the child of a parent who at one point wanted us to go through her house and tell her what we wanted (man! do NOT fall for that garbage!) I would rather have my mother give me what she wants me to have than to have to go through that (Yes, as I do, she has her own control issues! LOL)
If one of my aunts sent me something she thought I would like, I would probably thank her for it and tell her why it was so special to me ... I wouldn't necessarily think she was giving up. She is simply taking care of what is hers to take care of while it is in her power to handle it. <wave>
There comes a time in life when we decide what we will and may not be able to accomplish between now and the "going home" day.
Which would be more beneficial to me and my family -- to burden them with all of my stuff (and, maybe foment argument) or start presenting my possessions to others who might get better use out of them.
As the child of a parent who at one point wanted us to go through her house and tell her what we wanted (man! do NOT fall for that garbage!) I would rather have my mother give me what she wants me to have than to have to go through that (Yes, as I do, she has her own control issues! LOL)
If one of my aunts sent me something she thought I would like, I would probably thank her for it and tell her why it was so special to me ... I wouldn't necessarily think she was giving up. She is simply taking care of what is hers to take care of while it is in her power to handle it. <wave>
12-16-2010, 04:14 AM
#37
Super Member
Join Date: Apr 2010
Location: Jefferson City MO
Posts: 1,236
Thank her for the items and that they will be displayed in a proper place. Tell her she is welcome to visit them anytime!!! Try to add to your note that you have said prayers for her and encourage her to "beat" this thing and let her know you are there for her and that her items are waiting too!!!
12-16-2010, 04:36 AM
#39
Junior Member
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: Leominster, MA
Posts: 180
I am sure that she is not 'writing herself off'; but is taking the time to make some choices. When a crisis happens,(heart attack, stroke, cancer etc.) life as you know it is over. It is totally different. That is not to say that she is giving up, but that her whole perspective on what's important has changed.
I used to always say that I needed to get my priorities in order, but never could. When my husband had his stroke; all my little ducks lined up in a row and I never had to question which was the most important thing. That was 12 1/2 yrs. ago, and I still hold this as true.
I'm sure that she just realizes that the 'things' in her life just aren't as important as what she once thought they were. Therefore, she is able to part with them. I also am sure she is looking for a 'thank-you' and maybe even a note that would include a memory of what she sent you!
I used to always say that I needed to get my priorities in order, but never could. When my husband had his stroke; all my little ducks lined up in a row and I never had to question which was the most important thing. That was 12 1/2 yrs. ago, and I still hold this as true.
I'm sure that she just realizes that the 'things' in her life just aren't as important as what she once thought they were. Therefore, she is able to part with them. I also am sure she is looking for a 'thank-you' and maybe even a note that would include a memory of what she sent you!
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