Welcome to the Quilting Board!

Already a member? Login above
loginabove
OR
To post questions, help other quilters and reduce advertising (like the one on your left), join our quilting community. It's free!

Page 1 of 11 1 2 ... LastLast
Results 1 to 25 of 253

Thread: Have any other male quilters on this board had this problem???

  1. #1
    eaglebeak1960's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Location
    east central Indiana
    Posts
    211
    Hi guys, yes I am a male quilter, have any of you ever had this problem?? being a guy quilter in a woman dominated area has its draw backs. they kinda freaked out on me when I asked for help. I am a retired happily married man who just happens to love to quilt. SIGH then WHY do I get the feeling that when I go into a quilt shop unless I spend money there I am not wanted??? I asked for help (on a one on one basis) they could not be bothered to help I have been doing basic quilting for a number of years untill recently. Now I want to Improve my skills,

    I even offered to have my wife sit in on the sessions. nope not intrested not for any price. SIGH I just want to quilt.

    SOOOOOOOOO I am putting out a call here for any male quilters in my area that have advanced skill levels for help!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

    No No No I am not putting women down.


    Yours in Quilting
    Chris

  2. #2
    Super Member Lisa_wanna_b_quilter's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2009
    Location
    The middle of an IL cornfield
    Posts
    7,024
    Blog Entries
    1
    I know there have been some issues with at least one other male quilter on our board being refused admittance to certain guilds. It's ridiculous!

    Even if no one is close by, you'd be surprised at what this board can accomplish via the internet. If you have a specific question, ask it. Someone will be able to explain it.

  3. #3
    Moderator sharon b's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2008
    Location
    Northern Indiana
    Posts
    20,411
    Blog Entries
    10
    Chris there is a world of help here - use the tutes and ask many questions :lol:

    My friend doesn't quilt but wants to learn and he goes with me to the fabric stores and LQS and they all treat him great , sorry you are running into this problem .

  4. #4
    Super Member Maggiesmom's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    Middle Tennessee
    Posts
    2,014
    Blog Entries
    1
    I am sorry you have this problem. Speak up here and ask questions. I know you will get a lot of help.

  5. #5
    eaglebeak1960's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Location
    east central Indiana
    Posts
    211
    thank you

    I need to have a sit down side by side with people... I was injured several years ago. the meds I am forced to take (due to injury) have interfered with my ability to take written directions and make sense of them. sigh and to think I was a very smart man before my injury

    Chris

  6. #6
    Super Member Maggiesmom's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2009
    Location
    Middle Tennessee
    Posts
    2,014
    Blog Entries
    1
    Where are these quilt shops in Indiana that won't help you out? PM me and I may be able to direct you to a couple of shops that seem very friendly shops to me.

  7. #7
    Super Member sahm4605's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    Blue Springs, MO
    Posts
    2,240
    I can understand not wanting to be alone in a room with a man who you don't know, just dangerous for women, but when you said you would have your wife sit in, that is just unfair. I am sorry that you are having a problem. like others have said, ask questions here and you will get answers. and pics always help. I hope you find a local board member who can help in person. there is no substitute for getting one on one in person help. Good luck and please ask questions here. we will never ignore you just because you are a guy. it is actually nice to see hubbies and other guys who get interested in quilting. gives us a whole new perspective on quilting.

  8. #8
    Senior Member renee765's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2009
    Location
    San Antonio, TX
    Posts
    955
    Hi, Chris

    I'm glad to know that you are quilter. My husband (now passed) used to do a lot of needlepoint work. I have his works all over the house. It was neat to see him at work. In the later years, when he went to dialysis three times a week, he used to take his needlepoint with him. I would love to see the looks on others faces as they watched him with his needle. I always wanted to ask them 'where was it written that only females do needlework'? So, from my perspective, I'm very glad to have you among the quilters of the world.

    As for the LQS, there is one here in town that when I have been there, I've been treated just as you describe, even though I am a typical-looking female quilter. Perhaps it's just that the particular LQS has really bad customer service and it doesn't matter if your male or female.

    Revel in your skills, and don't let boorish clerks dampen your spirits. I appreciate having you on this board.

  9. #9
    Power Poster erstan947's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Location
    Louisiana
    Posts
    12,168
    Blog Entries
    47
    Chris, I know exactly how you feel. I was a female in a mostly male job (long haul trucker). I had trouble getting waited on at truck stops. The receivers treated me like dirt. My dispatcher would give me problems talking down to me. I just smiled and tried to do my job. I agree you can get help here. Ask questions and get involved in some of the swaps. The round robin I'm in has certainly stretched my skills. We are here and happy to help.:)

  10. #10
    eaglebeak1960's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Location
    east central Indiana
    Posts
    211
    Quote Originally Posted by renee765
    Hi, Chris

    I'm glad to know that you are quilter. My husband (now passed) used to do a lot of needlepoint work. I have his works all over the house. It was neat to see him at work. In the later years, when he went to dialysis three times a week, he used to take his needlepoint with him. I would love to see the looks on others faces as they watched him with his needle. I always wanted to ask them 'where was it written that only females do needlework'? So, from my perspective, I'm very glad to have you among the quilters of the world.

    As for the LQS, there is one here in town that when I have been there, I've been treated just as you describe, even though I am a typical-looking female quilter. Perhaps it's just that the particular LQS has really bad customer service and it doesn't matter if your male or female.

    Revel in your skills, and don't let boorish clerks dampen your spirits. I appreciate having you on this board.
    thank you it was not just here in indy... I lived in new england until winter of 09.. had same problem there.

    Mostly people in indy are REAL friendly. not like it in new england it was dog eat dog there

  11. #11
    Super Member clem55's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jan 2010
    Location
    Lexington,Kentucky
    Posts
    6,200
    Blog Entries
    6
    Chris, just sign up for a class , pay your fee in advance and show up. They never say women only allowed when you register, and I'd bet the other students would welcome you. And if the instructor wanted to ignor you, the quilters there wouldnn't!!

  12. #12
    Super Member Flying_V_Goddess's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Wisconsin
    Posts
    1,722
    I definatly know what its like to have a hobby that's mostly dominated by the opposite gender. Not quilting because...well, I'm a girl. However, I'm a girl who plays video games and listens to heavy metal (and sometimes my quilts are video game or metal inspired. lol). Very male dominated. But guys think its awesome (and kind of hot I guess) that I do play video games and listen to heavy rock music. Why can't it be the same for a man who quilts? I don't know. I personally think its awesome when a man either quilts or at least takes interest and doesn't think his wife's/girlfriend's quilting is stupid.

    And not getting help in the quilt shops: that's just terrible customer service. I just transfered over to electronics at the Wal-Mart I work at and I'm always excited to help out somebody in the game section. My favorites are the moms who are trying to buy Christmas presents for their kids and have no clue what their kids are talking about. Its fun to help them out and make sense out of the confusion between all the games and accessories. I would hope that women working in quilt shops would be the same and love being able to help out customers with their quilting needs (I'm assuming they'd be working there because they love quilting), espessily the men who come in trying to buy gifts for their wives or ones who want to try it out for themselves. I think its pathetic that there are ones who think men shouldn't be quilting. I think we should embrace anyone who wants to try quilting, female or male.

  13. #13
    Power Poster sueisallaboutquilts's Avatar
    Join Date
    Feb 2010
    Location
    Ohio
    Posts
    17,462
    Chris, that's terrible! It seems to me that many years ago most tailors were MEN!! What happened to people??? I think quilting is great for anyone who wants to do it.
    Good luck, my friend :)
    You know we are all here for you!

  14. #14
    Banned
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Sturbridge, Ma
    Posts
    4,014
    Chris: Sign on to the Yahoo Group. Introduce yourself and make some comments about what you do. I don't know if there are others in the group from Indiana.
    I had a male quilter group here in the area for awhile. It started out great but eventually dwindled down into uncertain attendance. However, there are two shops in the are that have male groups. I don't know what the attendance is.
    When I started the one here, One of the local papers did a good article. Get on the Yahoo group and start asking questions and others will tell you of their experience.
    I would suggest you go to the shop and ask for a private lesson to get started. (if they will do that)
    How close to you from Indianapolis?

  15. #15
    eaglebeak1960's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Location
    east central Indiana
    Posts
    211
    Quote Originally Posted by clem55
    Chris, just sign up for a class , pay your fee in advance and show up. They never say women only allowed when you register, and I'd bet the other students would welcome you. And if the instructor wanted to ignor you, the quilters there wouldnn't!!
    they freaked out had to bring wife along to get em to calm down!!!!!! she is very anti quilting, tolerates it cause I do it. was bored outa her mind

  16. #16
    Super Member Annaquilts's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    SoCal
    Posts
    9,749
    Quote Originally Posted by clem55
    Chris, just sign up for a class , pay your fee in advance and show up. They never say women only allowed when you register, and I'd bet the other students would welcome you. And if the instructor wanted to ignor you, the quilters there wouldnn't!!
    Yes, do this. Also maybe sign up for classes at the big quilt shows. Please don't be discouraged and keep quilting. I am raising many new male quilters at my home and DH keeps coming around in my sturio too. As for being ignored, I have that too sometimes even in classes. The same with some quilt shops. I hope you can find a good suport net work and environment to share and learn in.

  17. #17
    Senior Member magnolia's Avatar
    Join Date
    Oct 2009
    Location
    CA.
    Posts
    936
    Sorry, for your trouble Chris. I am not a male. However, I am a young quilter, 27. And I often feel the same way. I don't really feel welcomed by most of my guild (only a couple people) and some shops the workers just look at me as a pesky little kid (I look younger than 27). The shop closest to my house I think is the best. They actively try and recruit young people and men. Everytime a young person comes in or a man they want to help as much as possible. They never assume the men are there because the wife is the quilter, unless the man sits on the couch and has that glazed over look-haha. I was there the other day and a man came in with his wife, his wife sat on the couch and the husband started looking around. The owner asked if he needed help and he was surprised-he said he brought his wife as back-up because he's never offered help.

  18. #18
    Super Member raedar63's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jul 2010
    Location
    Ohio
    Posts
    4,045
    Dang what's wrong with people? Maybe it is just this shop. I am in a female dominent profession(nursing) and usually when there is a male nurse/tech/clerk whatever, the females get silly and baby them. My son recently out of the USMC started working on another floor at the same hospital I work ,he is like the star of the floor lol, I get after the girls all the time to not cut him any slack.
    I don't know what is wrong with people, I was in a LQS a week or so ago and the shop "female" was out on errands. The shop females' husband was the buyer for all the fabric in the shop and LOVED helping customers pick out fabric. He shared with me how so many of the women will leave rather than talk to him about fabric, patterns etc. Well let me tell you that this man talked to me more and was more helpful than any other shop I had ever been in.
    Come on ladies,you want equality? it is a two way street, and would I be scared to be alone with a male while sewing? HA! never, This girl carries!lol
    Although it could happen I really don't think sereal killers hang out at the local quilt shops girls ROFL.

    PS
    Eaglebeak has always been my dads nicname for my mom.lol,long story .....

  19. #19
    np3
    np3 is offline
    Power Poster np3's Avatar
    Join Date
    May 2010
    Location
    Bakersfield, CA
    Posts
    14,032
    Blog Entries
    7
    Quote Originally Posted by eaglebeak1960
    Quote Originally Posted by clem55
    Chris, just sign up for a class , pay your fee in advance and show up. They never say women only allowed when you register, and I'd bet the other students would welcome you. And if the instructor wanted to ignor you, the quilters there wouldnn't!!
    they freaked out had to bring wife along to get em to calm down!!!!!! she is very anti quilting, tolerates it cause I do it. was bored outa her mind
    That is crazy, the President of our Guild is a man.

  20. #20
    Super Member Flying_V_Goddess's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Wisconsin
    Posts
    1,722
    Quote Originally Posted by raedar63
    Although it could happen I really don't think sereal killers hang out at the local quilt shops girls ROFL.
    I just had the image of Jason Voorhees and Freddy Kruger piecing together quilt blocks by hand. lol.

  21. #21
    joan_quilts's Avatar
    Join Date
    Aug 2010
    Location
    Close to Breezewood, PA
    Posts
    398
    My dh has type 2 diabetes. He enjoys getting pedicures. The doctors told him he had to take good care of his feet. Well, I don't wanna touch those ugly feet!

    I finally talked him in to getting a pedicure. Now mind you, my husband is 6' tall, a good 230 pounds and a long haul truck driver. But, he looks like Ozzy Osbourne! Yes, he even paints his toenails and fingernails black!

    Anyways, we went to a shop and the women working there got bug eyed quick! They were nice and friendly, but you know they were making comments in their language! I often wonder what was said! LOL

    This was like 3 years ago. When we go to get pedicures now, there are signs on the doors that say "gentlemen welcomed".

    Don't give up! Not all quilters are old, gray haired ladies! Some of us are young enough to accept the differnces in people and would love to learn what you have to offer in a class room setting. I bet you have a lot to say that would be welcomed to many women.

    Keep smiling and keep going!

  22. #22
    Senior Member Norene B's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2007
    Location
    Custer, South Dakota
    Posts
    582
    There are lots of quilting videos on U-tube also that can help you in the meantime until you find someone to help in person.

    welcome to the club.

  23. #23
    Super Member C.Cal Quilt Girl's Avatar
    Join Date
    Jun 2010
    Location
    Central Ca
    Posts
    2,620
    Hate to hear that, but have had it done to me in different venus. You might point it out to the owner, nicely, they may not realize it's happening ! Can always ask if know of someone that will give private lessons, or a Guild where you would be welcome, or has other male members. Course can hang out here :)

  24. #24
    Super Member ssgramma's Avatar
    Join Date
    Mar 2010
    Location
    Bowling Green, KY
    Posts
    2,030
    You might also ask if they have ever heard of discrimination laws!

  25. #25
    lllog's Avatar
    Join Date
    Nov 2010
    Location
    Camdenton MO
    Posts
    478
    I understand completely. I own a quiltshop and when someone calls that wants info on the shop, having a man answer freeks them out. I've had woman say, can I speak to a woman.

    I may not be a quilter, my late wife was, but I can pick fabric out with the best of them.

    Lets face it, we're a minority in this business, but I've seen some very good work done by men.

    Men are always welcome in my shop, we even have what we call the husband chair for them to sit in.

    Lanny

Page 1 of 11 1 2 ... LastLast

Posting Permissions

  • You may not post new threads
  • You may not post replies
  • You may not post attachments
  • You may not edit your posts
  •  

SEO by vBSEO ©2011, Crawlability, Inc.