Isn't this the truth?
#17
Super Member
Join Date: Mar 2007
Location: Here and there
Posts: 1,669
This conversation never ceases to amaze me. It is the reason I have chosen to remain single. But I still want to know why any of you are hiding what you buy from your husband. What are you? Twelve years old? froggyintexas
I read this on another board & just had to share.
I don't know who wrote it, so I can't give credit where due. But I had to share!
Maureen
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On the Lighter Side
A recent study indicated that fabric gives off certain Pheromones that actually hypnotize women and cause them to purchase unreasonable amounts. When stored in large quantities in enclosed spaces, the Pheromones (in the fabric) cases memory loss and induces the nesting syndrome (similar to the one squirrels have before the onset of winter i.e. storing food). Therefore perpetuating their species and not having a population loss due to their kind being cut into pieces and mixed with others.
Sound tests have also reveled that these fabrics emit a very high pitched sound, heard only by a select few, a breed of women known as "quilters." When played backwards on an LP, the sounds are heard as chants, "buy me, cut me and sew me."
In order to overcome the so called "feeding frenzy effect" that these fabrics cause, one must wear a face mask when entering a storage facility and use ear plugs to avoid being pulled into their grip. One must laugh, however, at the sight of customers in a quilt fabric store, with WWII army gas masks and headphones!
Studies have also indicated that aliens have inhabited the earth, helping to spread the effects that these fabrics have on the human population. They are called Quilt Fabric Store Clerks.
It's also been experienced that these same Pheromones cause a pathological need to hide these fabric purchases when taken home (or at least blend them into the existing stash), and when asked by significant other if the fabric is new, the reply is "I've had it for awhile."
__________________________________________________ _______________________________________________
I don't know who wrote it, so I can't give credit where due. But I had to share!
Maureen
__________________________________________________ ____________________________________________
On the Lighter Side
A recent study indicated that fabric gives off certain Pheromones that actually hypnotize women and cause them to purchase unreasonable amounts. When stored in large quantities in enclosed spaces, the Pheromones (in the fabric) cases memory loss and induces the nesting syndrome (similar to the one squirrels have before the onset of winter i.e. storing food). Therefore perpetuating their species and not having a population loss due to their kind being cut into pieces and mixed with others.
Sound tests have also reveled that these fabrics emit a very high pitched sound, heard only by a select few, a breed of women known as "quilters." When played backwards on an LP, the sounds are heard as chants, "buy me, cut me and sew me."
In order to overcome the so called "feeding frenzy effect" that these fabrics cause, one must wear a face mask when entering a storage facility and use ear plugs to avoid being pulled into their grip. One must laugh, however, at the sight of customers in a quilt fabric store, with WWII army gas masks and headphones!
Studies have also indicated that aliens have inhabited the earth, helping to spread the effects that these fabrics have on the human population. They are called Quilt Fabric Store Clerks.
It's also been experienced that these same Pheromones cause a pathological need to hide these fabric purchases when taken home (or at least blend them into the existing stash), and when asked by significant other if the fabric is new, the reply is "I've had it for awhile."
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#18
I read this thread to the DH. He asked "Their husbands don't notice that the house has started to tilt to one side and everything has a tendency to slide off the table?" I'm glad my DH goes with me and even helps pick out some of the fabric.
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