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Thread: Need motivation

  1. #1
    dcurvey's Avatar
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    This has been one hell of a year. We lost grandpa (uncle to me) in April and I have been going back and forth across provinces till my aunt 9whom I called mom) passed late October. I have not been able to get the sewing machine going..is it cause she taught ne to sew? I have quite a few projects to do but can't seem to get going. I did make all the Christmas gifts as usual but can't seem to decorate. I go to church but end up crying half way through. Any advice on how to get going again?

  2. #2
    Community Manager PatriceJ's Avatar
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    take this time to rest and to heal. let your memories of grandpa and mom wash over you to bring comfort and inspiration for future projects. go through your fabrics, patterns, favorite websites. "quilt" with paper and color pencils.

    when the time is right to sit down again at the machine, you'll know. and mom will be with you in your heart as you take that first stitch - and every stitch you sew from that moment on.

    they are at peace, and will want the same for you.

    big, fat, squeezy, hugs

  3. #3
    Power Poster SulaBug's Avatar
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    My words of advice, are the same as Patrice's. Take care of you now & soon the time will be right. Take care friend.

    Thinking of you,
    Cheryl


  4. #4
    Super Member Mplsgirl's Avatar
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    I'm sorry for your loss. The good memories will come in time and give you inspiration. Take time to grieve, it's a necessary thing. Bless you.

  5. #5
    Super Member mary quite contrary's Avatar
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    I'll be praying for you and take time to heal. Someday you will be able to quilt again. I still have my mom but my dad has been gone for a lot of years. I still tear up sometimes when I think about him. Tears are an OK thing. Here comes a hug.

  6. #6
    Super Member gcathie's Avatar
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    I too agree with Patrice....I feel my friend everytime I sit and sew....pick out colors....she always disagrees with me....:-)......that's how I know it's her.

    I will be looking forward to seeing your next project on here.....hugs and prayers are with you!!

  7. #7
    Super Member Barbm's Avatar
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    take time to heal, and each person's time is exactly right for them.

    this is the first year since my brother died in '05 that I've done any decorating, not to the scale I used to do, but it's more than begrudgingly putting up a tree at the request of others.

    I still feel his loss, it grabs you at moments when you least expect it, but I know what I must do to shake the possibility of a foul mood. I honor him with positive memories and try to keep the tears at bay.

    Take time for yourself and some day you will feel like quilting again.

    Barb

  8. #8
    Super Member beachlady's Avatar
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    I know it is hard to hear the words that time heals all wounds, but take it from my experience, it does help. The loss will always be there, but what I try to do is concentrate on all the goods memories of the people I have lost and even once in awhile I get a smile on my face. We honor our loved ones with our memories and the hope we will be reunited again one day. I can almost see your "mom" wagging her finger at you and it is telling you that she wants you to enjoy your sewing once again. I am sure the winter days aren't helping any either - can you get any special lights? Good luck with what you are going through - you will make it!!!

  9. #9
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    Aww--I'm sorry it's tough now. And, in time, yes, you'll heal. You need more time. No reason to push it--you'll know when it's right to start that which brings you joy. Pamper yourself.

    {{{{{{HUG}}}}}}

  10. #10
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    You have my deepest sympathy. Everyone has given good advice. It just takes time, you won't forget them but the pain and sorrow will eventually pass. It's especially hard when the loved ones pass during the holidays. Beachlady is right, they have discovered that the length of daylight has a great deal to do with depression. Maybe if you could have more lights on than normal, it would help. If you need to talk, we're here.

  11. #11
    Power Poster sandpat's Avatar
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    All good advice from the others. We all grieve in our own way and find ways to cope that allow us to make it through the bad times. The pain never goes away and the hole they leave in our lives never closes, but we find a way to deal with that plus move forward. I still tear up and can cry at the weirdest times..seemingly for no reason..

    You'll get back to your sewing when the time is right for you. Don't worry about trying to rush or force it.

  12. #12
    MsSage's Avatar
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    I am sorry. Oct is still very new for a loss. TAKE your time you can not rush the griving process. I tried but I only made it last longer.
    My grandma gave this to me right before she passed to help me deal with the loss of 2 of my students.


    Celtic Night Prayer

    Do not hurry
    as you walk with grief,
    it does not help the journey.

    Walk slowly,pausing often:
    do not hurry
    as you walk with grief.

    Do not be disturbed
    by memories that come unbidden.
    Swiftly forgive,
    and let God speak for you
    unspoken words.
    Unfinished conversation
    will be resolved in Him.
    Be not disturbed.

    Be gentle with the one
    who walks with grief.
    If it is you ,
    be gentle with yourself.
    Swiftly forgive,
    walk slowly ,
    pausing often...

    Take time, be gentle
    as you walk with grief.

  13. #13
    Super Member sewsewquilter's Avatar
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    {{{{{{HUG}}}}}}} and warm thoughts.

    Everyone has given you great advise.

    Take care of yourself and enjoy your memories.

  14. #14
    Senior Member dojo36's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by dcurvey
    This has been one hell of a year. We lost grandpa (uncle to me) in April and I have been going back and forth across provinces till my aunt 9whom I called mom) passed late October. I have not been able to get the sewing machine going..is it cause she taught ne to sew? I have quite a few projects to do but can't seem to get going. I did make all the Christmas gifts as usual but can't seem to decorate. I go to church but end up crying half way through. Any advice on how to get going again?
    on a piece of paper, make 2 columns, one for your heartaches and the other one for your blessings. that's what i've done before and it sure helps me - my blessings column is much longer. i had major major surgery in july of this year and i'm so much better but still not completely back to par, but i wake up every morning and thank God that I'm alive, and can think - see - feel - care - sew & quilt - and do a little cooking and housework. everybody needs time to heal in times of loss, but hopefully it will soon be a memory of the past and not so much in the "now".

  15. #15
    Super Member Quilt4u's Avatar
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    It takes time. I did not sew when my Dad passed away. And when my Mom Passed I could and still have a hard time knitting.

  16. #16
    Moderator sharon b's Avatar
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    All have said so much...Just take time for yourself...It will come back to you when the time is right.
    {{{{{{{{{{{{{HUGS}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}}
    Sharon

  17. #17
    Super Member mimee4's Avatar
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    Incredible prayer. I will be sharing it will a group of "Wednesday friends". We all grieve and need to experience the grief in its fullest, to come through to the other side.

  18. #18
    Izy
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    The time will be right....... when it is...[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[[hugs]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]]

  19. #19
    dcurvey's Avatar
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    Thank you all. I needed that. I have still not taken the sewing machine out for a spin but I am making a pair of her slippers, a pattern she taught ne long ago. The last time I was with her we were knitting away and talking...as one woman does to another. So right now I guess knitting is keeping me going. I'll have to start donating them to the church again one I have a pile made.

    Thanks you all, This is the best 'board' I have ever joined, with the fun, insight, knowledge and supoort.

  20. #20
    Power Poster RedGarnet222's Avatar
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    I am so sorry for your loss. But, from experiance I know that you are in very good hands now. Just remember that when you are weak, god is the strongest. Just ask for that peace that is beyond your undertanding. And stay in your faith. There will be bad days and easier days. But, you will live happier if you just trust it will get better and live like you know that.

  21. #21
    BlueChicken's Avatar
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    ((hugs)) from the other side of the world.


  22. #22
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    Oh my Dear, I know exactly what you are going thru. I lost my half brother just a year ago. DH the first part of Nov. & my good hunting buddy the day after Thanksgiving. The same night as we had gotten my elk.

    There are still some days, I just wander around the house. Can't settle down to do anything. Will read a sentence or 2, start cutting fabric, put it away, sew a couple of blocks on the levi "Billie blankets". Push a little snow off the deck. Just seems like I am spinning my wheels. Other days, are just not long enough. Up early, start the dishes, cut fabric, vacumn, dust, do laundry, etc. I have learned to just take 1 day at a time. Am finding, through my journeling, that I am slooowly getting more accomplished each day.

    It's tough, d**** tough to keep going but when I get weepy, I just stop what I am doing, get those sinus' cleared, blow the ol nose & continue on. "pull up my big girl panties, & deal with it".

    I think the hardest part is the NOT sharing of conversation. When I see something unusual, hear something I want to share, there is no one there to talk to. But if my dogs could talk, I'd have to sew their mouths shut!! LOL

    I gues what I am saying, is take your time. Baby steps. And before you know it, all of a sudden when you look back, you have accomplished quite a bit!

    hugs go out to you.

    Billie

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