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Thread: Now I know the reason for being a Fabricholic!!!!!

  1. #1
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    Now I know the reason for being a Fabricholic!!!!!

    Chemical Warning

    A recent study indicated that fabric gives off certain Pheromones that actually
    hypnotize women and cause them to purchase unreasonable amounts. When
    stored in large quantities in enclosed spaces, the Pheromones (in the fabric) causes memory loss and induces the nesting syndrome (similar to the one squirrels have before the onset of winter i.e. storing food). Therefore perpetuating their species and not having a population loss due to their kind being cut into pieces and mixed with others.

    Sound tests have also revealed that these fabrics emit a very high pitched sound, heard only by a select few, a breed of women know as quilters. When played backwards on an LP, the sounds are heard as chants, buy me, cut me and sew me. In order to overcome the so called feeding frenzy effect that these fabrics cause, one must wear a face mask when entering a storage facility and use ear plugs to avoid being pulled into their grip. One must laugh, however, at the sight of customers in a quilt fabric store, with WWII army gas masks and headphones!

    Studies have also indicated that aliens have inhabited the earth, helping to spread the effects that these fabrics have on the human population. They are called QUILT FABRIC STORE CLERKS. It's also been experienced that these same Pheromones cause a pathological need to hide these fabric purchases when taken home (or at least blend them into the existing stash), and when asked by significant other if the fabric is new, the reply is I've had it for awhile.


    Has anyone else been affected like I have (LOL)!!!!

    Maus

  2. #2
    Super Member burchquilts's Avatar
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    Oh, listen... I have it bad! And that ain't good (for my Visa!)!!! LOL! This is too cute. And too true, I'm afraid! What is it they say about truth being stranger than fiction???
    (`v)
    `*..*
    .
    .*).*)
    (.(. (..`..♥ rebecca

  3. #3
    Power Poster mighty's Avatar
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    That is great!!!!

  4. #4
    Super Member maryb119's Avatar
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    At last!!! There is a diagnosis!!!!! I just hope there is NO cure!

  5. #5
    Super Member 0tis's Avatar
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    I knew it!!! I have told my LQS that my car is in cahoots with the fabric - I cannot drive by the quilt store without stopping - its not me - its my car - it automatically pulls over and parks when there is fabric nearby. (Thats my story and I am sticking with it ).

  6. #6
    Super Member ube quilting's Avatar
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    I just don't bother to hide it!
    no act of kindness, no matter how small, is ever wasted. Aesop

  7. #7
    Senior Member cat-on-a-mac's Avatar
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    Too funny! Somehow, those pheromones are also very technologically advanced, as they travel thru the internet like a virus, and force me to give Paypal a lot of business!
    Cathy

  8. #8
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    THIS explains a few things!!

  9. #9
    Super Member Pat625's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by ube quilting View Post
    I just don't bother to hide it!
    Me either!! I just divorced the one that questioned my fabric purchases...so much nicer and easier!! LOL

  10. #10
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    Quote Originally Posted by Pat625 View Post
    Me either!! I just divorced the one that questioned my fabric purchases...so much nicer and easier!! LOL
    Me too! Now I have fabric in one spare bedroom and my scrapbook stuff in another, and there is no man in the house to say a thing about it!

  11. #11
    Super Member Neesie's Avatar
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    I just checked this out, through Snopes. There are NO urban legends of that sort, SO IT MUST BE TRUE!
    Neesie


    By all means let's be open-minded, but not so open-minded that our brains drop out.
    ~Richard Dawkins

  12. #12
    Super Member trif's Avatar
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    This explains everything! Just yesterday I was at a LQS and HAD to make a purchase, I tried not too, I couldn't control my actions. Every where I turned the fabric was calling to me! I just knew I wasnt crazy!!!

  13. #13
    Super Member auntpiggylpn's Avatar
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    It has to be true! I went to the LQS yesterday. They were having a secret email sale of 25% off everything in the store. I have put myself on a strict low yardage diet until I get many projects done. I wanted a charm pack so I gave myself permission to go and get it. I walked out with a layer cake and coordinating fabrics and some Tiger Tape! What should have cost about $8 wound up being $96 dollars! Oh, well. I saved $30!!
    No one has ever become poor by giving. - Anne Frank
    Darkness cannot drive out darkness; only light can do that. Hate cannot drive out hate; only love can do that. - Martin Luther King, Jr.

    http://www.etsy.com/shop/TheQuiltedPig

  14. #14
    Super Member Lori S's Avatar
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    This "afliction" can also be passed from generation to generation. Just look at my Mom's stash ... and then mine... I think it became more potent as it was passed.

  15. #15
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    It all makes perfect sense to me.
    I don't want to brag but I can still fit into the earrings I wore in high school.

  16. #16
    Super Member jcrow's Avatar
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    My husband works out of town quite a bit so sometimes when I buy a lot of fabric and come home and his car is in the driveway, I leave my sack in my car and come in the house empty handed. Then, when he goes to work, I run out and grab my sack. One time, I went out and grabbed my sack and was coming out of the garage and he was pulling back in the driveway because he forgot something. I stood frozen with my bag of goods. He got out of his car and laughed at me. He said he knew that I had been doing this because when he'd go into the garage for something, he'd see sacks in my car and look in them and shake his head and laugh, but didn't let on to me because he thought it was fun to see me sneak around. He told me I could spend my money on all the fabric I wanted, that I didn't have to hide it anymore. Now, it kind of takes the fun out of it...hiding it and waiting for him to leave and then bringing in my goods and drooling over them. Now, he wants to see what I bought and tells me if he likes my fabric choices, which he always says he does. He's good like that. But I kind of miss living on the edge when I was hiding my sacks...miss the thrill!
    "Be yourself...everyone else is taken."
    Strong people don't put others down...they build them up."
    "Remember that your instincts are more important than rules"

  17. #17
    Senior Member teddysmom's Avatar
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    I'm glad to know there is a diagnosis. Let's just hope no one sets up a foundation to find a cure!

  18. #18
    Senior Member Quiltlady330's Avatar
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    I love it....Now I have a new explanation. My pheromones made me do it. LOL

  19. #19
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    Too funny! I think I'll e-mail this to my husband. He is actually the fabric-pusher because he bought the sewing machine for me for Christmas! A sewing machine is just a gateway to this condition!
    Bobbi
    Quilting happily in Tennessee!


  20. #20
    Member bisque's Avatar
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    Yes, also its best to shop with groups of sewing friends so you have more eyes to observe these crazy things! It could happy to anyone! I noticed only with a select few you see these vines growing and as you try to walk by they reach out and grab you called, "Wait a Minute Vine" and it makes you immoble you cannot move. The squirrel effect is related in the brain cells to the hiding of the stash for winter months, I know because I have suffered this too, and depending on your age sometimes you cannot remember for days where you hit your stash.
    Grum from N.J.

  21. #21
    Junior Member Debd's Avatar
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    Should have known what to expect when I saw "reason" and "fabricholic" in the same sentence.

    You might want to forward this to Mythbusters to see if they can prove your reasoning!
    Debbie Dresser

  22. #22
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    I'm glad to finally have that problem diagnosed. Now let's hope there's no easy cure for it.

  23. #23
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    I wonder if my husband will believe this. LOL I hide my purchases. But since he does the check book he still knows. But he does the same thing when he goes to the wood store. Wood must have the same affect for men as fabric does for women. ;-)

  24. #24
    Super Member beatys9's Avatar
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    Well that explains everything! I wonder if DH will understand...
    Shannon

  25. #25
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    ROFL!
    I wonder if there are any 'young' quilters on this board scratching their heads wondering about playing LP's backwards!

    That really dates us!

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