Perfectionist vs. Good Enoughist
 

As some of you might have guessed, I’m working on those darn puppies and, although I’ve come a long way, parts are still giving me fits but I’m getting through it. I mentioned something to my daughter and she lovingly said “Well, if you weren’t such a perfectionist…” Huh? Whaaat??? Then she pointed out that every meal I make is perfect (I don’t see it), every small appliance on my counter is perfectly aligned. Every candle has a perfectly trimmed ¼” wick, blah, blah, blah. I don’t set out to do that, it just happens.

So I was wondering, when it comes to quilting, how many of you are perfectionists and how many of you are good-enoughists?

Perfectly said, Tartan.

Definitely a 'good-enoughist. Mmy motto is "Done is better than perfect".

I'm a kinda sorta person. That's just what I am. Always have been. If something looks kinda sorta ok, that's good enough for me. Although I do seem to fuss around when I want something exactly like I want it.

Even perfectionists can't achieve perfection, so why go crazy trying?

I'm not a perfectionist because it's not achievable, no matter how much I try.

I long ago gave up perfectionism (as in about age 18) but the words “good enough” sounded synonymous with “mediocre” when it came to my efforts.
I soon realized that what my personal standard was (in school and work) is excellence, as judged by me. If I know I’ve done my best with the skills and experience and intellect I have, I’m satisfied. In other areas of my life, I have no problem calling “good enough” on something I’ve done—cooking, cleaning, gardening. If I can live with the results, I let the rest go.

I have higher personal standards for some things than others.

With some of my housework I have decided to label myself as a "casual housekeeper".:D

If your happy w/it...then it's Perfect!

My thoughts exactly. I’m the only one I have to please except the hubby and he’s always pleased with my efforts.

I try to do my best possible work at all times, but there is a large heaping of "good enough" in me too. Most of my projects are use quilts, pretty blankets. It's not that I don't have standards, but I don't have design/workmanship considerations that I have when I'm trying to work on an "award winning" quilt. I'm very happy making every day dishes when I look at all the fine china around me :) plus, I want to use my fine china as well as the every day stuff.

When I first started quilting, I was very happy with some pretty horrendous projects and seams and such and I got better over time and my expectations got higher. Now, as I deal with my vision issues -- well, I don't see so clearly as I once did but I'm still sewing. Again, not exactly that my standards got lower but that my expectations over what I can do is lower than it once was-- so I try to do the best I can.

I'm trying some different styles and techniques nowadays and a lot of my projects are cut simpler than maybe they would have been five years ago. Part of me knows that my best work is most likely behind me, but I'm still having fun and I love playing with fabric. And in that case, good enough is the best I can do!

I kept reading the responses and kept saying, "Yep. That's me. Right on. You know it! So true." Yeah, I'm just like everybody else, LOL! :D I remember Mary Ellen Hopkins saying, "Honey, not every quilt needs to be an heirloom; there's just not that much time left!" God rest her precious soul.

Jan in VA

I understand. I'm never totally happy with most stuff. I think what makes me that way is my innate talent. My talent is that I can see what's wrong with most anything. I can see anything that is not level, not lined up, not the same color, etc.

One of my employees once told me I should be in quality control. Another one said I was, "picky, picky picky".

Sometimes, I think it's a curse. Whatever it is, at least I've learned to keep my mouth shut, most of the time.

bkay

If you can’t see your mistakes from 6 feet away on a galloping horse, it’s perfect as far as I’m concerned.

I try for perfection but of course I can't achieve it so the best I can do is all I can do.
I always told our kids to do the best they could do. I always try to do the best I can do.

Done is better than perfect. If I've done my best, I let it pass.

There are some things I can live with (like dust and leftovers for supper and unfolded laundry) and some that I need to at leasttry to make better (like that corner where two--or more-HST's meet that just isn't quite right on a quilt that is being gifted to a family member or QOV or...) but only to a certain extent. If it really bothers me I try up to 3 times. At that point number 3 is the way it stays. Period.

My biggest hurdle is colour coordination. I spend more time auditioning and second guessing myself on which fabrics to put together than I do in scrutinizing my intersections. I am really really trying to make my choices and just live with them.

I'm with zozee. I try to produce an excellent product, but perfection is out of the question. And "good enough" does sound like mediocre to my ears. That said, sometimes I do have to admit that I'm not going to do it any better on the 4th (or 29th) try, and I might as well move on. That frustrates me, but I'm not losing any sleep over it.

What does that word even mean? I think there is a difference between wanting to have things the way that makes you feel accomplished and being over-particular. If you feel better when your appliances are lined up and your clothes are hung 1" apart, then go for it, as long as that stays with you and you don't project that onto others in your household. Some things I like certain ways and I don't understand why others don't :) but I have to live with me and them so I try to "control" my own things and if I don't want water spots on the bathroom mirror two seconds after I clean it, I wipe them off instead of dragging the offender back in to wipe it down or yelling at them for it. It just makes more sense, takes less time and is emotionally healthier for both of us.

As far as sewing, I do the best I can with my skill set and of course, the more I do it the more confident I become. Sometimes I'll rip out 4" for one stitch and sometimes I'll just "whatever" it away. I do what I do to make me feel good about what I am doing, in things that I am doing myself - cooking, cleaning, ironing, dishes, laundry, yard work. Some days I care more than others and some days I let it all go, order pizza for us and chill.

So I guess it's up to you. It's like they say, don't let anyone make you feel bad for being you. Or, pick your own nits. Or, just go with it.

same here...and that goes for my quilting projects as well. I am not a perfectionist but I am OCD. 😝

Proud perfectionist here! :)

Words I have learned to live by, sure cuts down on the stress level:)

I do the best I can and that is good enough for me.

I'm the perfectionist in almost everything I do, my house is always clean, nothing on my kitchen counters, no knick knacks anywhere. Nothing out of place, this is how I've always been. No clutter, everything has a place and gets put away. Luckily my husband is the same way. When it comes to sewing, yes I like my stitches to be even, everything has to line up, etc., I strive for perfection in everything I do. What is perfect to me may not be perfect for anyone else. It's in the eye of the beholder.

I try to do my best and I think I continue to expand my quilting ability but I won’t stress over it. It is my hobby and it gives me joy. I believe in “ live and let live”. My house is moderately clean and neat which suits me and if you were coming over I would hope it was to visit me and not to critique. I laugh at my mistakes and correct what I can. Life is just so much fun!

Jan, I Loved Mary Ellen Hopkins. She was delightful!

I heard a phrase once that really, really made an impression on me - 'Perfectionism is the enemy of Creativity'. And, it truly is. I tell my students that they usually do not make mistakes, they add design elements! You are making the quilt, you get to add/delete things as you choose. Others will see what you make as a wonderful gift, a work of love and heart. We need to stop being so hard on ourselves and get back to the joy of creating the piece. We tend to drive ourselves crazy over the little things that no one will ever see or care about.

klswift above me said it well.

It isn't a mistake, it's design element.

Although I work hard at my quilts and try to get them technically correct, done is better than perfect.

Watson

I really struggled with the saying "finished is better than perfect" as I don't like doing less than a best effort. But I came to understand that for me, it means not agnoizing in the desision making area - is this the "prefect" border? is this the "perfect" block layout? - the things that can sometimes totally stall my progress. So now instead of wanting to explore every possible option, I find one that looks good and then stop looking.

I also know how to do $10 an hour work and $50 an hour work, so I decide ahead of time which one is the appropriate level. Neither are poor quality, it's just the level of perfection I strive for.

The quilts in museums like Paducah, KY blow me away. So do those in every quilt show. That said, I have no intention ever to have my quilts shown in either venue. My quilts are destined for use, heavy use. I make those quilts that rest between your sheets and your comforter or spread, never seen but giving love to those who sleep beneath their warmth. My quilts go under your picnic spread. get drug around by toddlers across the lawn and in mud puddles, and find themselves under young teens at the beach. My quilts cover the laps of strangers in retirement homes, show up at fires where a child who has lost her bear is comforted because, serendipitously, the bear on her new quilt looks exactly like the special one she just lost. The quilts I make end up in dog beds and in the backs of cars. They also leave hospitals with children who had the misfortune of being there but often will only sleep with that quilt afterwards. They cover sick family who begin to feel better and enjoy doing seek and find with the fabrics used, only two of each!

Having no artistic gifts, I get by and no one seems to mind that I don't appliqué or paper piece and I use beautifully simple patterns. There's a world of need out there and I don't have time to be that particular. Yes, for me, done is better than perfect. I adore seeing those beautiful quilts in shows and museums but you won't find my quilts there. To my sisters and brothers who are the artists of the quilt world, kudos! Keep up the good work! I am taking care of the other end of the spectrum of quilters and enjoying it. The loving but utilitarian nature of quilting heritage is being taken care of by quilters like me. The quilt world is wide and all inclusive! Hooray for us all!

I have to have my house company ready or I'm not happy. It's easy for me as I have perfected how to do it the way I like using very little time to do it. I like how I function during the day when I wake up to a clean pretty house and go to bed in a clean pretty house and that is my goal for housework. The housework almost perfection does not spill over in my quilting at all. I don't care if my points are not pointy or my binding is wavy. That is not my goal. My goal is to make a quilt with fabric colors and pattern that I want to make. One quilt may look perfect and one may look like it needs help. All the same to me. I won Viewer's Choice with one quilt some of my guild members were appalled I entered. Only other quilters saw the flaws. The public loved it. LOL

I am in the "better done than perfect" camp. I have many many ufos and wanna make quilts on my list, but my cancer has come back and even with chemo have been given only about 20% chance of living more than 2 years. So it's time to prioritize what I'm finishing. First up is to finish quilting a carousel panel I'm making for my someday-to-be first great granddaughter.

gramajo, I will keep you in my prayers every prayer.

gtamajo - wishing your well -

I have a rule. I will redo something that's not quite right only 3 times. After that, I consider it good enough.

I'm not sure true perfectionists realize they Are perfectionists. They may not think in terms of "perfect" but in "right", as in "there's a right way and a half right way and a wrong way" and always insist on the right way. Is that perfectionism? Perhaps.....although many don't think of it that way. I think we all have a "perfect for me" which may not be the same standard as someone else's "perfect".

I just made a cushion cover for a outdoor chair -- something that didn't matter At All in that I made it only for temporary comfort. I plan to replace all the patio chairs, most of which have no cushions. I had real problems sewing the bottom "plate" on the boxed corners of the top, just couldn't make it work properly and the end result was untidy and "not right". And yet the cushion cover was sewn together and would have been serviceable. But I ripped it out and persevered until I had no folds or wrinkles in those boxed corner seams. Is that perfectionism, OCD, or just my own personal "the right way"?