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Thread: quilting for free ( when they want to pay)

  1. #1
    Super Member Diana Lynne's Avatar
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    I am having a wee bit of a problem..I have some neighbors that we are close too..One of them had a major by pass heart procedure..The other is her daughter..Well, they want me to make them a quilt, which I do not mind doing but the problem is they want to pay me for it..Which I do not want..If they do not pay, they do not want me to do it..I am a beginner quilter ( only made 2 quilts so far..am working on 2 more) and I know that my sewing capabilities are not that good..I make mistakes and lots of them..I told them that if they bought the material that would take care of any payments but no..They do not want to do that..They want to pay me ( probably a couple of hundred dollars)..What I am thinking is that I will make them a lap top quilt and just give it to them as a gift) but knowing them they are still going to try and pay me..How do I give them quilts without them trying to give me money?

  2. #2
    Senior Member PABerard's Avatar
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    I am not sure why you won't accept payment, but that is none of my business. I suggest you accept the payment and use it towards fabric for another charity quilt. Otherwise, maybe ask them to get you a gift card to your LQS? Maybe ask them to barter... perhaps they could make you dinner for however many nights it takes you to construct the quilt? Good luck ~ Pat

  3. #3
    Super Member fabric_fancy's Avatar
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    i had this problem with a close friend and regardless of what i said or wanted she insisted on paying me.

    i finally got around it in a very sneaky way and she still jokes with me about it to this day (its been 5 years).

    i told her to pay me with a check and i just never deposited it and therefore never really got paid for making the quilt.

    i do agree with her that it was sneaky but in the end we both got what we wanted and were happy with the way the problem was solved.

  4. #4
    Super Member IrelandDragonQuilting's Avatar
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    Perhaps ask them to donate any monies they wish to pay you to the local shelters or food banks? They value your time and know what it takes to make a quilt. You are a very kind and generous person to make them quilts and not want anything in return. Sure sounds like your two families are close and have a great relationship!

  5. #5
    Super Member deedum's Avatar
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    I am sure they want to be fair and considerate of your time, regardless of your skill level. It still takes time, money to buy the tools and etc. They are trying to not to take advantage of you. Perhaps you could only take part of it when they offer. I am sure you could use the money to buy more quilting items. Another suggestion is take the money and let them know you will make charity quilts or put it toward a raffle quilt. You know pay it forward! That way everyone wins.

  6. #6
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    I look forward to others' answers. If it was me, I would make something I liked that I know they would like (just in case, they have a change of heart) and then get started. That's how many professionals start- they need customers and clients- you never know if you are customer #5 or #500 unless they tell you. Apparently your neighbors like what they have seen so far and understand what goes into a quilt. I would also charge 3 times the cost of materials at a minimum. After it is done, you will not have been overpaid. And you can use that money to further your quilting journey wherever it takes you.

  7. #7
    Member katsbmr's Avatar
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    I am with you on this one. I also am a beginner with my long-arm (have done about five so far). I am volunteering, to enable me to get the experience, without the demands and expectations of a paying customer. When I have more experience, then maybe will charge. Good luck on this one

  8. #8
    Moderator QuiltnNan's Avatar
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    using the excess, over the costs, for charity quilting seems like the best solution.

  9. #9
    Super Member Charleen DiSante's Avatar
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    Or, to their favorite charity or one doing research into their kind of illness? Or, you do it when they pay you. Or just accept it, some people feel that if they have asked me to do something then it is their responsibility to pay.
    Quote Originally Posted by IrelandDragonQuilting
    Perhaps ask them to donate any monies they wish to pay you to the local shelters or food banks? They value your time and know what it takes to make a quilt. You are a very kind and generous person to make them quilts and not want anything in return. Sure sounds like your two families are close and have a great relationship!

  10. #10
    Super Member IrishNY's Avatar
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    I would either accept the payment and then make a donation to the American Heart Association or ask them to make a donation in your name. If not the AHA, another charity that is important to you or to them.

    I can understand them not wanting to feel like they are taking advantage of you by paying you. Please try to appreciate it. How many times are there complaints on this board about people who want us to make quilts for them for free? Way too often, so this is a nice problem to have. :thumbup:

  11. #11
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    I would take another approach to this. You said your a beginning quilter - only made a couple. I would find a class that I would love to take and make a deal with them. Tell they you will make the class but as payment they have to pay for your class to become a better quilter.

    WIN-Win situation

  12. #12
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    Quote Originally Posted by QuiltnNan
    using the excess, over the costs, for charity quilting seems like the best solution.
    This is a good idea. Why is it so hard for us to accept an offer of payment or reinbursement for our good deed. I also think that you could charge them the cost of fabric and then a minimal amount for the labor. Then accept the money, say thank you and either keep it for yourself or you could donate it to a charity.

  13. #13
    Super Member Glassquilt's Avatar
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    I first thought was take the money and donate it.
    Some people are sensitive about accepting 'charity' or feeling as if they may be in debt to the giver. If it makes them feel better to pay, let them pay and donate it either in you name or in their name.

    Like the check idea. :)

  14. #14
    Super Member Diana Lynne's Avatar
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    Everyone has give me some great advice..Thank you all..Its a hard decision when it comes to family and friends..If I took my quilts to a market to sell, I do not think that I would worry about adding a price to what I make..( after I become better at sewing :wink: ) Or even if my friends and family send others to me to make a quilt, than I would not mind being paid..I really like the idea about them giving the money towards a charity..That way, they would still feel like they paid me if they are remain adamant about it..Thank you all again so very much for the wonderful advice..This board is awesome !!

  15. #15
    Community Manager PatriceJ's Avatar
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    no matter what you decide, i hope you will thank your friends for having that much respect for you, your time, and your budding talents.

    their offer and insistence show how much they care about you as a person and a friend. :thumbup:

  16. #16
    Super Member Diana Lynne's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PatriceJ
    no matter what you decide, i hope you will thank your friends for having that much respect for you, your time, and your budding talents.

    their offer and insistence show how much they care about you as a person and a friend. :thumbup:
    Thank you Patrice..That made me smile and made me very happy..you are so very right..I never really thought of it that way :-)

  17. #17
    Super Member Rebecca VLQ's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PatriceJ
    no matter what you decide, i hope you will thank your friends for having that much respect for you, your time, and your budding talents.

    their offer and insistence show how much they care about you as a person and a friend. :thumbup:
    And this is a really good answer.

  18. #18
    Super Member quiltsRfun's Avatar
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    Take the money and donate it in your friend's name to the heart association or another charity.

  19. #19
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    take the money and don't insult them by refusing. if you feel guilty then give the money to charity or use it in some way to make your neighbor more comfortable.

  20. #20
    Senior Member Zebra2's Avatar
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    Sounds like this is their way of showing appreciation and respect for you, just as you respect and appreciate them. Accept it as they accept you are your quilting, with gratitude for having friends such as these. Bless you!

  21. #21
    Senior Member quilter1430's Avatar
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    Maybe instead of money, you could suggest they do something else for you, like go out to lunch/dinner together and they can treat?

  22. #22
    Super Member Jan in VA's Avatar
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    Don't let quilting become a power struggle....."no, I can out give YOU"!.....allow this couple their blessing.

    Obviously their heart intent is to bless you, and for the giving they are blessed in return.

    Graciously accept whatever they offer and, without explanation, put it toward a class, as suggested by Karen, to improve your skills so you might be in position to earn further monies for skill. They will consider it seed planed in good soil. :-)

    Jan in VA

  23. #23
    Super Member amyjo's Avatar
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    I agree. take the money and use it to further your education in the field of quilting. your friends obviously think a lot of you and respect you, so as not to abuse your friendship. I would take and make the quilts as asked and say no more. maybe this is the only way that they feel they can show you how much they appreciate and respect you.

  24. #24
    Junior Member Joy.lynn's Avatar
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    A while ago, we gave an apartment size washing machine that we no longer used to my best friend's daughter. My friend wrote us a cheque but we did not cash it. She appeared one day with a huge gift basket. As she said, we might rip of her cheque, but we would never throw away her gift.

    Your friends want to show you appreciation, you must be a very special person.

  25. #25
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    Take the money and donate it to your favorite charity. Let them know that you're going to do this. If they protest, use the money to buy more fabric!

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