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    Old 02-27-2011, 07:48 PM
      #91  
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    She sounds like a Bridezilla to me. :roll:
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    Old 02-27-2011, 08:23 PM
      #92  
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    I agree. I would write her a note saying sorry but you will not be able to attend either event but best wishes. People( especially some of the young ones)now days seem to have not remembered manners or were not taught manners. I have never given 2 gifts. If I go to the shower, I take a gift but not to the wedding.
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    Old 02-27-2011, 08:28 PM
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    Originally Posted by sueisallaboutquilts
    Originally Posted by bailey
    This is a girl I work with. Do not socialize with her or see her other than at work. Still even wonder why I recieved an invitation. BTW - her wedding invitation also suggested proper attire and which colors she preferred you wear!!

    And you're worried about etiquette??????????? :D
    What she said! OMG, Emily Post is rotating in her grave.
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    Old 02-27-2011, 09:04 PM
      #94  
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    I hope she and her monochromatic friends have a blast. You were invited so she could try to obligate you to a gift. Side step the whole thing.( I think your "Aunt Marge" will have her funeral that day, anyway.) :oops:
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    Old 02-27-2011, 09:27 PM
      #95  
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    Originally Posted by imanoni
    While we are on this subject, what would you do if you had spent some time shopping for a gift, wrapped, it packaged it and mailed it insured of course. Then one day a package appears in your mailbox from the giftee returning it saying she didn't like it, would you please go buy something else and then ship it to her? Personally,I would return the gift to the store if I could, and forget her and "un-friend" her as they say on Facebook....
    In this case, after I recovered from the shock, I would decide if I liked the gift enough to keep it for myself. Ship her a token gift card to Target, she can pick out what she wants...maybe a book on courtesy.
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    Old 02-27-2011, 09:46 PM
      #96  
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    Originally Posted by sharon b
    Sounds kind of rude and demanding to EXPECT big shower gifts :hunf: Sorry Any chance you can go in with a couple people to make the gift more affordable and still meet up with her expectations ?

    As for the wedding it all depends - if it is a close person and I truly can't make the wedding I send a card anyways with a small gift , other wise if you are not attending the wedding you are not obligated to send a gift - in fact a gift should not even be expected for the wedding. many at my sons wedding gave nothing but the kids were thrilled that the people showed up , felt that was the gift - the gift of their presence ( Not present) at their special affair
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    Old 02-27-2011, 09:53 PM
      #97  
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    If you go to the bridal shower you take a gift to that....as far as any gift to take to the wedding...I say at least give a card with $$$ or gift card (like home depot / lowes or something else that can help them put their house together) at the wedding
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    Old 02-27-2011, 11:22 PM
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    In this case, after I recovered from the shock, I would decide if I liked the gift enough to keep it for myself. Ship her a token gift card to Target, she can pick out what she wants...maybe a book on courtesy.[/quote]

    eimay has hit the nail on the head-a book on manners though the meaning would probably elude her.
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    Old 02-28-2011, 12:30 AM
      #99  
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    I was raised during the period where an invitation to a wedding (or graduation or whatever) called for a gift. An announcement was exempt.

    I understand the financial constraints and I wouldn't feel totally obligated to getting something expensive for both. Give what you can, it comes from the heart.
    She may not realize it now...but give her time...she will.
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    Old 02-28-2011, 07:27 AM
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    I would suggest going in with a couple coworkers on a 'big' gift for the shower. As for the wedding - you do not need to send a gift and I doubt that she will notice. I'm sure there will be plenty of gifts to open.
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