mimisharon

Controlling isn't she? Forgetaboutit, not worth the trouble unless she's able to cause problems at work.

Julianna

My friend worries that she is obligated to spend more than she wants to as the bride-to-be is her niece. BTB sent a list of gifts she wanted with prices. The CHEAPEST was a set of salt and pepper shakers for $50! Should also mention she has children from former guys, never married before, wants a huge white wedding with horse and carriage and is nearly splitting up her parents. My friend is a good person and said if it wasn't family she would not even attend. Her niece never comes to any family gatherings as she is ashamed of her kin. I said you can give her a different gift. What do you all think?

grannyQ

I hope you don't have to work very closely with her. She will make your life a living H---. I worked with some like her and it wasn't very nice some days. I sure do pity the new hubby and his parents. I don't see how this marriage will last very long. She doesn't deserve any gifts in my opinon.

eimay

Just send a card with a personalized note wishing her happiness.

cheryl rearick

good lick to you which ever way you go :)

butterflywing

why are you going to the shower? she's not even a friend.

send one small, thoughtful gift and call it a day. like a nice bottle of wine and a card of congratulations. what nerve.

the only reason to send anything at all is that you have to see her at work.

imanoni

While we are on this subject, what would you do if you had spent some time shopping for a gift, wrapped, it packaged it and mailed it insured of course. Then one day a package appears in your mailbox from the giftee returning it saying she didn't like it, would you please go buy something else and then ship it to her? Personally,I would return the gift to the store if I could, and forget her and "un-friend" her as they say on Facebook....

firecrackerpam

Unfortunately as it is a work function, I would see if several folks would pitch in on one gift (I am sure there are some that feel as you) and don't go/give a wedding gift. That keeps the peace and makes it more affordable although this situation is clearly not acceptable and this young lady needs to learn some manners. Thank goodness you have some. If others can't or don't want to than I think the other options suggested such as the charity or what you can afford are clearly acceptable solutions. You are the bigger person here.

jitkaau

I wouldn't bother if you have already given a gift at the shower. One gift is enough. Send a card to the wedding,wishing them well and stating that you hope they enjoy the _____________ that you gave them.

isnthatodd

I usually give a Target or Walmart gift card, as there are always things to get when you set up a new household or have a baby. They also transport nicely. Fortunately, I haven't been invited to anything that would require an expensive gift, because it's just not in the budget.