behavior problem question
#171
Senior Member
Join Date: Nov 2010
Posts: 897
Perfect solution (restitution). A life lesson that just might stick! :thumbup: If other people would only have the courage to discipline in love we'd have a more civil society. Point out to those who have critisized you, that you didn't beat him or even charge him what the toy actually cost, you also taught him a lesson in mercy. :thumbup:
#172
Super Member
Join Date: Apr 2007
Location: North Carolina - But otherwise, NOTW
Posts: 7,940
Originally Posted by amma
At the age of 8, he knew exactly what he was doing. Teaching him that there are consequences is a good thing. Teaching him that he needs to be financially responsible for his actions is a good thing too! :D:D:D
AND, if they purposely misused or in anger broke something, they had to pay for it. Accidental breakage was, of course, forgiven.
We also did NOT loan money against "future earnings".
Our kids almost all grew up to responsible, goals oriented adults.
#173
Super Member
Join Date: May 2009
Location: Merced, CA
Posts: 4,188
[quote=feline fanatic]IMHO, parents who do not teach their children that there are consequences for their actions (bad and good) are doing their children a grave disservice and eventually releasing irresponsible adults into society who have a misguided sense of entitlement.
----------------------------
Yes....just sit back and listen to a bunch of cops and/or jail and prison guards talking about the strange ideas of their charges. Most of these cons seem to be honestly confused as to why they were arrested, they apologized to the victims, didn't they? And so why are they still in jail? They seem to have absolutely no idea of there being any consequences of their actions, Mommy and Daddy would bail them out if they got into trouble. And far too often the parents did so, until the crimes got serious enough to send them to jail.
Parents like raising kids like this are giving my oldest son and oldest daughter life time jobs in a prison and a jail!!!!
----------------------------
Yes....just sit back and listen to a bunch of cops and/or jail and prison guards talking about the strange ideas of their charges. Most of these cons seem to be honestly confused as to why they were arrested, they apologized to the victims, didn't they? And so why are they still in jail? They seem to have absolutely no idea of there being any consequences of their actions, Mommy and Daddy would bail them out if they got into trouble. And far too often the parents did so, until the crimes got serious enough to send them to jail.
Parents like raising kids like this are giving my oldest son and oldest daughter life time jobs in a prison and a jail!!!!
#175
Originally Posted by DebraK
I think you made a very fair consequence for his actions. It's not like you mindlessly spanked the child or ignored his misdeed. There was a lesson attached.
#177
Super Member
Join Date: Dec 2010
Location: Dallas area, Texas, USA
Posts: 3,050
I just hope the "flak" didn't happen in the child's presence. Perhaps you should ask the ones who are complaining just how they think the situation should have been handled, but you'll have to ask it in a way that expresses curiosity rather than an accusation, or they'll just light into you again. I think a lot of times issues between adults about how a child should be disciplined are just a power struggle between the adults. They resent that you exercised this authority, even if they didn't have the gumption to do anything about the behavior themselves. Kids will pick up on this and the bad behavior will escalate if it seems that in doing so he can manipulate adults into a blow-up.
#178
You are a great grand parent. Children need to be taught the meaning of responsibility for the actions. They realize what they did was wrong. If you let him get away with it he may do something worse the next time. Plus he needs to learn how to control his anger even if he is eight. Your reaction was age approiate. I'm feel bad for you that you got flack for doing the responsible thing.
Thread
Thread Starter
Forum
Replies
Last Post
bearisgray
General Chit-Chat (non-quilting talk)
6
10-21-2010 12:09 PM