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Thread: Making things for family

  1. #1
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    Have you ever made things for your family and they say "Thank you, that is really nice" but you have the feeling it really isn't good enough?

    I some times wonder if I should continue. Do you ever think that too?

  2. #2
    Super Member natalieg's Avatar
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    I get that feeling every now and then...I just don't make the certain people things, or limit it to really quick, simple things for them.

  3. #3
    Super Member luvTooQuilt's Avatar
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    there are few non-quilters that do not see what time effort and money go into it that cannot seem to appreciate homemade gifts and then there are others who just plainly do not like homemade gifts- if it doesn't have a store tag then you were considered cheap..

    Just remember how it makes you feel.. Don't worry about them.. Know that YOU did a great thing.. after all its what we love..

  4. #4
    Cyn
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    Super Member Cyn's Avatar
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    Yes, especially when it get puts away and never pulled out. My mom always nagged me to quilt her a jacket. Finally I bit the bullet, made a jacket that I was proud of and made a matching bag. She tried it on and didn't like the way it fit, although no one else sees anything to change. I felt bad but have never made anything else for her to wear. I did make a quilt later for her that she and her sister tore up with comments so I don't make her stuff anymore. It's ok tho, after 52 years, I know nothing I do is good enough and FINALLY, it doesn't bother me anymore and I don't try. She didn't get the perfect daughter she wanted. She loves me bunches but she has problems and they aren't my fault. Sorry too long. Sore subject at times for me :(

  5. #5
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    Yes, I have a SIL in AZ that is always wanting something, and if i don't get it done soon enough or exactly how she imagined it, she says so. I have made more for her, and she still wants more. She just told me today that "She really would like her purse, and didn't you say you had the cats blankets done?" I said, "there are alot of things I would like to get done for myself too." I haven't ever made anything for me yet. It is usually gifts or donations that get done first. I work a full time job and a part time job. So this year I have decided that I want to sew at least one evening a week, and to start something for me! I probably will keep making things for others, but cut back on things that someone asks me to make. In other words, I need to learn to say, "Sorry, I have too many things going right now." :)

  6. #6
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    Quote Originally Posted by luvTooQuilt
    there are few non-quilters that do not see what time effort and money go into it that cannot seem to appreciate homemade gifts and then there are others who just plainly do not like homemade gifts- if it doesn't have a store tag then you were considered cheap..

    Just remember how it makes you feel.. Don't worry about them.. Know that YOU did a great thing.. after all its what we love..
    DITTO!

  7. #7
    Member newbie1001's Avatar
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    I've been reading quite a few comments like this, especially now after the holidays. I sew and quilt myself, so I do have an idea about how much time, skill and money goes into projects. On the other hand, doesn't it ever occur to you that other people just have a different taste than you, and no matter how much work went into something, they just don't like the looks of it? I know I've received gifts in my life that I didn't like, handmade and store bought. I think, with quilts especially, the person giving them is very proud of the achievement, and there's probably also a bit of vanity involved. So the disappointment sometimes has more to do with hurt pride, I would say. I just think we can't give something as a present that suits our taste, but not the recipient's, and then not understand that they don't like it.

    Do you all hate me now?

  8. #8
    Super Member AnnieH's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cyn
    Yes, especially when it get puts away and never pulled out. My mom always nagged me to quilt her a jacket. Finally I bit the bullet, made a jacket that I was proud of and made a matching bag. She tried it on and didn't like the way it fit, although no one else sees anything to change. I felt bad but have never made anything else for her to wear. I did make a quilt later for her that she and her sister tore up with comments so I don't make her stuff anymore. It's ok tho, after 52 years, I know nothing I do is good enough and FINALLY, it doesn't bother me anymore and I don't try. She didn't get the perfect daughter she wanted. She loves me bunches but she has problems and they aren't my fault. Sorry too long. Sore subject at times for me :(
    so similar to me. Try for myself now.

  9. #9
    Super Member Shelbie's Avatar
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    You need to know and understand your family's likes and dislikes. Everyone has family members that just don't understand what we do and why we do it. They are the ones who wouldn't appreciate anything you made so why bother. Save your special "things" for yourself or those you know appreciate them. My sister absolutely adores what I make and she will get more. My brother couldn't care less so why would I bother to take a lot of time and money to create an unappreciated gift? As quilters we have to determine who we will share our works of art with and who in the family gets a gift certificate to Canadian Tire.

  10. #10
    Senior Member cmw0829's Avatar
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    I don't make things for my family any more (other than my DH, DS and me). Nobody ever complained about things, but they were accepted and then put away. After my mother told me that I made things for family to be a "show off", I stopped. Nobody ever complained about that either!

    The only thing I ever made for my mother that she has used and loved is a memory quilt made for my parents' 50th anniversary. But I think the reason is that it shows her as a young woman and is all about her. Ooohhh...was that snarky? (I do see that we have some "mother issues" here.)

    Now, I make things for very close friends and for donation. I feel so much more satisfied.

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