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Thread: Anniversary

  1. #1
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    Today would of been my 47 anniversary DH passed little over 4 years. I know most people don't celebrate annivesaries when their spouse has already passed but to me this is still an important day in my life. I didn't expect a celebration but my children have all seemed to forget that this day is special to me. Didn't get a call from any of them to inquire what kind of day I am having. It would of made my day a little less lonely. Thanks for letting me vent and thanks to those that understand my feelings

  2. #2
    Super Member frauhahn's Avatar
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    Kids can be like that. I hope that you've found some little way to celebrate the day and to remember the good times you had together.

  3. #3
    Junior Member nanaquilter's Avatar
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    So sorry to hear about your loss. Kids just get busy and forget about the date. Glad you let us know how you are feeling. Maybe just sharing will help you get through the day.

  4. #4
    Junior Member g-maquilts's Avatar
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    I'm sure your kids thought about your anniversary too! When my mom's comes around I just don't know whether or not to mention it. I guess I should know that she is thinking about my dad and I won't make her any sadder by mentioning it. They would have been married 65 years this past Feb.

  5. #5
    Super Member julia58's Avatar
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    Happy Anniversary to you. I'm sorry for your loss. I've learned to never count on anybody. You just have to make it the kind of day you want it to be. Maybe your children didn't say anything or send any card because they didn't want you to hurt.

  6. #6
    Super Member Cybrarian's Avatar
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    The first couple of years I sent cards then called after that. Their marriage honestly wasn't the best, but they stayed together for 47 years and that is very important. In current society there seems to be a philosoPhy of "moving on" and in listening to the pop psychologists of the day they may be concerned they might make the day more difficult for you. As Someone currently married for 32 years and the mother of 2 grown sons I'd like to suggest something. Call them and keep it on the positive side such as "was thinking of your dad today and the anniversary we..." or any memory that would be special to that child and end with "guess I thought of it since this is our anniversary". Sometimes we have to initiate what we need from others because it doesn't occur to them. Happy anniversary, I wish you many special memories today and always.

  7. #7
    Senior Member Quiltinggma-nc's Avatar
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    Happy Anniversary. I guess many people don't know what to say. Sorry for the loss of your DH.

  8. #8
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    Quote Originally Posted by Cybrarian
    The first couple of years I sent cards then called after that. Their marriage honestly wasn't the best, but they stayed together for 47 years and that is very important. In current society there seems to be a philosoPhy of "moving on" and in listening to the pop psychologists of the day they may be concerned they might make the day more difficult for you. As Someone currently married for 32 years and the mother of 2 grown sons I'd like to suggest something. Call them and keep it on the positive side such as "was thinking of your dad today and the anniversary we..." or any memory that would be special to that child and end with "guess I thought of it since this is our anniversary". Sometimes we have to initiate what we need from others because it doesn't occur to them. Happy anniversary, I wish you many special memories today and always.
    Sometimes it is hard to know what to do - this seems like good advice.

    Hope your memories are mostly happy ones.

  9. #9
    Super Member judy_68's Avatar
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    Maybe they thought they would upset you.

  10. #10
    Moderator Jim's Gem's Avatar
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    Happy Anniversary!!!
    I am sorry that you have to celebrate alone!!

  11. #11
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    Happy Anniversary. Praying that you had some very time to think back on all of the great times, you guys had together. So sorry for your lose.

  12. #12
    Senior Member TwinRiverFarm's Avatar
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    Happy Anniversary! My kids never know what to say either, so I send them an e-mail on their dad's birthday reminding them to raise a glass of his favorite beer up high and toast his life. Our anniversary is my turn to make a toast and thank him for all the memories he left me with. And yes, I still cry a bit after 10 years.(hugs to you!)

  13. #13
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    I'm sending warm thoughts to you today. I'm sure the kids are maybe just busy, or maybe the date just got away from them. It sounds like you and your husband had some wonderful years together. My sympathy for your loss.

  14. #14

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    Quote Originally Posted by TwinRiverFarm
    Happy Anniversary! My kids never know what to say either, so I send them an e-mail on their dad's birthday reminding them to raise a glass of his favorite beer up high and toast his life. Our anniversary is my turn to make a toast and thank him for all the memories he left me with. And yes, I still cry a bit after 10 years.(hugs to you!)
    It is going on 10 years for me too. Thank God for the memories. hugs to you too.

  15. #15

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    Quote Originally Posted by sassey
    Today would of been my 47 anniversary DH passed little over 4 years. I know most people don't celebrate annivesaries when their spouse has already passed but to me this is still an important day in my life. I didn't expect a celebration but my children have all seemed to forget that this day is special to me. Didn't get a call from any of them to inquire what kind of day I am having. It would of made my day a little less lonely. Thanks for letting me vent and thanks to those that understand my feelings
    Today is my son's 12th anniversary! I called him to wish him a Happy Anniversary. My DH, his father, has been gone since 12-2-2001. But I don't think my son has continued to send me wishes. Kind of hard to say
    "happy ------" when DH is gone. Still what would we do without the memories? Glad you posted here and I am wishing you Blessed Memories.

  16. #16
    Super Member susie0808's Avatar
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    I light a candle on my parents anniversary every year.Both are gone now Dad 22 yrs and Mom 7 years. I also light one on their birthdays. I celebrate with stories and my kids luckly don't tire of it. Miss them terribly.

    So many of us have a story or two. Our hearts go out to you with hugs for we understand. So Sassey I'll raise a glass to you and say happy anniversary. For it is an anniversary for you to look back on with loving memories.

  17. #17
    Junior Member skitter's Avatar
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    Sometimes we children just don't remember that you have a special day or just don't want you to feel worse because you love is no longer around physically. Maybe you can gently remind them that your wedding anniversary is still a very special day to you and always will be. Happy Anniversary to, I know your husband is celebrating with you on the other side.
    Chiquita

  18. #18
    Power Poster Jingle's Avatar
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    Happy Anniversary, I hope you had a lot of memories to make your day just a bit happier.

  19. #19
    Super Member Quilter7x's Avatar
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    This date will always be an important date for you. No one can take away 43 years of your life, so I think you should celebrate this day remembering all the good times you had. {{{hugs}}}

  20. #20

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    I am approaching the second anniversary of my husband death and his birthday and our 34th anniversary. All in June. I have no idea how to deal with it. I miss him so much! this place is so good to share, so I wish you a happy anniversay!

  21. #21
    Super Member JEM65's Avatar
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    Happy Anniversary to you. I am sorry for your loss. I am very glad you put up your post so we could all be there for you on your day. Sometimes, as children, we don't know if our good wishes are the right thing to do when we have lost a parent. My parents had just reached 49 years when Dad died, Mom cried everyday for 5 years for him. It was very hard for her.

  22. #22
    Dotsie's Avatar
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    A dear hug for you.

  23. #23
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    A dear hug for you.

  24. #24
    Super Member OmaForFour's Avatar
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    HAPPY ANNIVERSARY!!!!!

    I will be married 49 years in November. I still have my husband with me.

    Quote Originally Posted by sassey
    Today would of been my 47 anniversary DH passed little over 4 years. I know most people don't celebrate annivesaries when their spouse has already passed but to me this is still an important day in my life. I didn't expect a celebration but my children have all seemed to forget that this day is special to me. Didn't get a call from any of them to inquire what kind of day I am having. It would of made my day a little less lonely. Thanks for letting me vent and thanks to those that understand my feelings

  25. #25
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    So sorry for your loss. I'll just say that I don't even think my kids know our anniversary date. Sometimes you have to be honest and ask for what you need. Possibly at some point when the emotion is less raw, you could let your kids know what would help on difficult days like this.

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