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Thread: Cliches'...."pay it forward"

  1. #1
    Super Member Sandygirl's Avatar
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    Cliches'...."pay it forward"

    I am so tired of hearing "pay it forward" and "give back". (I did not "take" anything). I understand what they are advocating (volunteering, sharing, etc) but still, there has to be a better way to express it. Is it me?

    sandy
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  2. #2
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    ​While those things are great, I wish people just spent every day being kind.

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    Super Member NUTMEG10's Avatar
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    Tartan you have the right idea - kindness goes a long way. When I donate it comes from the heart.


    Doris

  4. #4
    Super Member CookyIN's Avatar
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    These terms don't bother me. To me, they're a way of reminding those of us who feel blessed to be a blessing to someone else, even in the smallest way. (Because what's small and insignificant to one, can be huge to someone else.)

    Now there are certain current buzz terms which are quite prevalent right now, especially among campaigning politicians and ivory tower academicians. I won't mention them, because this isn't a board for political debate. However, when I hear those terms, I close my ears, so I certainly understand where you're coming from.

  5. #5
    Community Manager PatriceJ's Avatar
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    i have a steady income; a sturdy roof over my head; never go hungry; a son i'm so proud of i get all misty when i think about it; good friends; family; a functional car; a fabric stash that will keep me going for a good long time; nice machines; .... the list goes on and on.

    did i "take" anything?
    no

    but i still have lots of "it" to be thankful for and enjoy doing what i can, when i can, for others who might not be as fortunate.

    there are also the little random acts of kindness from total strangers.
    those always make my day.
    so, i try to share that by committing my own little random acts of kindness to strangers when the opportunity presents itself.

    "pay it forward" isn't about re-paying anything.
    the phrase is meant to encourage us to create or maintain the momentum of kindness for its own sake ... passing it along in the hope it will spread far enough that we are all as kind as we can be without even thinking about it or finding it remarkable.

    it's one of the few cliches that doesn't bother me.
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  6. #6
    Super Member Sandygirl's Avatar
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    Patrice,

    I agree. I thank God every day for the "things" I have , my good health and the people in my life. I volunteer, donate time, treasure and talent and I am kind too. Buzz words and cliches get boring after a while, and lose meaning.

    Sandy
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    Moderator QuiltnNan's Avatar
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    well said, Patrice. i, too, have so much to be thankful for in my life. i'm not rich in money, but i find every opportunity to give my time and talents... my way of paying the kindness and blessings forward.
    Nancy in western NY
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  8. #8
    Senior Member cizzors's Avatar
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    Baby bump, I say pregnant. The one that really gets me is "I'm on a fixed income". This usually comes from retirees. I don't work anymore by choice. When I did, if I was going to be over 40 hrs for the week, I had to 'kill' time so there wasn't any OT. My husband is salary. Right now he is putting between 60-70 hrs a week in. He does not get OT-fixed income. Depending on the conversation, some people think they are exclusive because of their 'fixed income'. I just roll my eyes and laugh.
    Never outsmart your common sense.

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  9. #9
    Power Poster ManiacQuilter2's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by PatriceJ View Post
    "pay it forward" isn't about re-paying anything.
    the phrase is meant to encourage us to create or maintain the momentum of kindness for its own sake ... passing it along in the hope it will spread far enough that we are all as kind as we can be without even thinking about it or finding it remarkable.

    it's one of the few cliches that doesn't bother me.
    I agree with PatriceJ. When I am trying to get onto a public bus, I appreciate when a young person comes to my aid to help me up the steps with a heavy walker or give up the front seat for me. I then in-turn, try to pass on an act of kindness to another person. Might be the same day or a week later. I am always glad to explain the ins and outs of public transportation to a newbie. In this world, there is a big need for more small acts of kindness.
    A Good Friend, like an old quilt, is both a Treasure and a Comfort

  10. #10
    Super Member Doggramma's Avatar
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    I don't really care for buzzwords either, but it's a way to remind people to be nice so I try not to let it annoy me. On Facebook every once in a while someone will announce it's "pay it forward" day. But people should be nice to others every day! I don't know if it's because I'm starting to look old or what but young people do kind things for me all the time too...opening doors, letting me go first. I've found that it's older people that aren't particularly nice. I'm getting older and I try to be nice to everyone everyday. But that's the way I was raised.
    Lori

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  11. #11
    Super Member athomenow's Avatar
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    I guess when people say "fixed income" that means we don't have the opportunity to get any overtime pay or to get a raise or anything that used to come when we worked outside the home. We are retired, have a nice income but it is less than half of what it used to be. My husband drives a school bus for extra money but of course you can't make too much or SS will take some back. Too bad that what we worked for isn't always what you get. It's a way of explaining to people that you don't have the discretionary money you used to have.
    Debra

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    Super Member RobertaMarie's Avatar
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    I don't get upset with cliches, etc. I ignore what I don't use or like. However, here is a cliche in reverse. Not too long ago, two beautiful ladies from my guild came to my house and reorganized my sewing room for me. They worked from nine in the morning to four-thirty in the afternoon, with only a brief break for lunch. They really made a difference in my room, since I had not cleaned it or put stuff away for two years, due to a disability and post open heart recovery. I really appreciated the help, and offered to pay for their time, and they graciously said: This is from your times past of paying it forward for others. And I felt very humble and thankful for these sweet ladies. I can now move around in my sewing room, and my cleaning lady can even vacuum the floors now! So, no, I don't get upset with cliches. Sometimes they fit, and I am just not letting small things ruffle my feathers as I age. Thanks again to Maureen and Nancy for the loving care they extended to me. I know they do that a lot. God bless to those who can and do, from those who can't but would. Roberta Marie

  13. #13
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    I am so tired of "at the end of the day".........and "going forward". LOL

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    Quote Originally Posted by Sandygirl View Post
    I am so tired of hearing "pay it forward" and "give back". (I did not "take" anything). I understand what they are advocating (volunteering, sharing, etc) but still, there has to be a better way to express it. Is it me?

    sandy
    Sandgirl, maybe its because people are using the term to impress others with "how much" they are giving back or paying it forward?

  15. #15
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    The one that bugs me is 'random' acts of kindness, I would rather call it a conscious act of kindness or even a regular act of kindness.

  16. #16
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    Speaking of that, I need some feedback on something I'd like to do for someone who used to be a bigger part of my life when we worked together. I bumped into her today and she was filling me in on some hard times she's been having, all the while cheerful with a great attitude. Times are hard but they are doing what they can to meet their obligations. I'd love to get her a gift certificate to a restaurant they like. Would it be kind ( which is my intention) or would it embarrass her?

  17. #17
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    My pet peeve is "from the get go." What is wrong with the word "begin" and its variations?
    And I have to admit, when I hear the cliche "pay it forward" means someone is expecting something in return. There was a series of books about it for a while. My husband thought they were wonderful, because giving aways always brought good things back. I finally asked if he ever did anything that he didn't expect something in return? It wasn't in any of the books I read.

    And for the friend rather than a gift card to a restaurant - it would depend on the presentation. Is her birthday soon? Can you just send it to her anonymously?

  18. #18
    Super Member Sandygirl's Avatar
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    I am not saying that we should not give of ourselves, we certainly should. I just hate the cliches to describe the action.

    Sandy
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  19. #19
    Super Member moonrise's Avatar
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    The only ones I can think of offhand are "baby bump", and when they combine a celebrity couple's name, such as Brangelina or Kimye. Ugh.

  20. #20
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    It is not only things of monetary value to pay it forward or pass on to another, smiles, a kind word and the list goes on.
    Create something beautiful from scraps.

  21. #21
    Super Member MissM's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by cizzors View Post
    Baby bump, I say pregnant. The one that really gets me is "I'm on a fixed income". This usually comes from retirees. I don't work anymore by choice. When I did, if I was going to be over 40 hrs for the week, I had to 'kill' time so there wasn't any OT. My husband is salary. Right now he is putting between 60-70 hrs a week in. He does not get OT-fixed income. Depending on the conversation, some people think they are exclusive because of their 'fixed income'. I just roll my eyes and laugh.
    Not everyone who retires does so by choice, many are forced to because of health reasons. When that happens you are certainly on a "fixed" income because the government controls your income. Also please don't roll your eyes because it is no laughing matter. Until you have walked in that persons shoes you are in no position to judge. Just be thankful you were fortune enough to retire by choice.
    Last edited by MissM; 05-29-2014 at 06:41 PM.
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    I have been blessed many times over and if can pass along some happiness to others I will gladly "pay it forward". It doesn't mean money it means something from your heart.
    fixed income is something most retired people are on and if you are not you have been blessed.
    Kindness is a language which the deaf can hear and the blind see.
    mark Twain

  23. #23
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    Quote Originally Posted by quiltingcandy View Post
    My pet peeve is "from the get go." What is wrong with the word "begin" and its variations?
    And I have to admit, when I hear the cliche "pay it forward" means someone is expecting something in return. There was a series of books about it for a while. My husband thought they were wonderful, because giving aways always brought good things back. I finally asked if he ever did anything that he didn't expect something in return? It wasn't in any of the books I read.

    And for the friend rather than a gift card to a restaurant - it would depend on the presentation. Is her birthday soon? Can you just send it to her anonymously?
    Yes, I think I can get it to one of her work places without her knowing it was me. Just don't want to make things awkward.

  24. #24
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    I don't think the buzzwords matter that much. Let them say it however they want. My position is: You can never be too kind to too many people in one lifetime, but it's a good idea to try. So share, even if it's only a smile.

  25. #25
    Power Poster solstice3's Avatar
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    PatriceJ ... Well put! I also agree with cookyN ... So sick of political and academic buzz words. Skip all the buzz and just do what needs to be done

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