blueheavenfla

You mentioned an attic...could it be finished into a small sleeping space for your son and his stuff? Perhaps a portion could be heated/air conditioned...just a small room to make him welcome but not so comfortable that he stays too long. Good Luck to him and to you and your DH.

GailG

I agree. I'm sorry he is having problems, but it you make him too comfortable, he may not be ready to work on solving his problem too soon. This may seem harsh, but you have raised him to be a responsible adult and that is all you "owe" him.Now it is up to him to work it out. It's great that you are offering him support when he needs it. Perhaps offering him alternatives. I've been there. He was in a bind and we took him in, but we didn't make any changes. His former bedroom is now our computer/library room with his closet being used for my cake decorating supplies. (His sisters' bedroom is now the sewing room.) He "camped out" with us for a couple of weeks while he was working it out. Thank goodness, it was soon resolved. Sit tight. Remember, you raised him. He'll be fine.

butterflywing

can your son be the one that finishes off some attic space for himself? not a lot, but enough for a small room. or if you want to give him back his old room, he should do the whole attic for you.
it sounds like a heater and a/c would be a good idea up there anyway. in any event, he's not a throw-away child. making him feel less than welcome for any length of time that he needs you will make you feel guilty. he just may need your help finding the right kind of financial help or education he needs to pull it together. there are all kinds of social services out there for financial advice and educational choices and the services are free for the asking. also community college vocational training programs. help steer him in the right direction. (pay forward)

btw, no one owes an adult child anything. we do for them out of love. how many here are raising their gc while their single children work? if a kid lost his job and couldn't find one for 2 years, would he be loafing around feeling too comfortable? i once needed help from my family and they helped me out of love. it was me who hated it and i guarantee you that this young man is not happy to be in the position of a child again.

julia58

I have always believed in "If you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything at all." And by all means "I sure don't want to offend anyone, but...." This thread has opened my eyes. I THOUGHT quilters were a nice bunch of people.... After this thread, and a few others I see the light on how some of you really are. Just let me say this, I hope none of you are ever put in the position this young man has had to lower himself to. Because you wouldn't deserve the doghouse outside to sleep in.

Mattee

As you have just shown, quilters are not all nice, or even polite. They're just people.

Up North

My son His fiance and little boy moved in with us for six months. they had a room in the basement but I ended up caregiver to the baby had to take him to day care and pick him up was a difficult time as we didn't agree on discipline rules but in the end it all worked out. But 6 months was a Long time! If you can find a space for him it will be worth it!

marknfran

I must really agree with you. If a child cannot ask help from his parents, then it is a sad day on earth. We do not know of the exact details of him becoming "homeless" but as a parent I would NEVER turn away my child!!!

marknfran

I have to add one more thing: on three different times our son has had to ask for help and we gave it to him; sometimes with lodging, sometimes with money; today he is happily married, a family, a great job and no financial problems and we can ask him for help if needed. FAMILY!!!!

Surfergirl

Remodel the attic.

AnnieH

Toughish but I agree. I have a son too who is experiencing difficulties, so understand.