jaciqltznok

we have a crappy OLD run down theatre that is just nasty...and will cost us $12.00 per person to go see and snacks (which is where theatres make their money) are ridiculous!

SO we are opting to drive 1.25 hours south to the CITY and pay only $8.00 to see it in a really nice MALL theatre...

why??? just like your DD...we LOVE HP and this will the very last HP midnight premiere they will get to go and see!

Make it special!

roseOfsharon

My feel is to allow her to make the decision. She knows of the price differences and distance and the sacrafice you would be making to take them. This is learning experience in itself. One she will know of your generosity of your time, two, a feeling of being trusted to make the decision,and most importantly, she will learn to make sacrafices for others when needed. Trust in your daughter's decision and she will gain confidence.

Peckish

This is exactly what my SIL did with her 2 boys. She would go through their wardrobe with them and see what still fit and what needed to be purchased, etc. Then she would give them XX dollars in cash and turn them loose in the mall. The first year the oldest one did not listen to her and spent it all on a pair of designer jeans. He had to do his laundry every night until Christmas, lol!

If this were my 17 year old son (who is a pro at attempting to manipulate us through the "you don't understand!" line) I would give HIM choices: If you want to go and do XYZ, which is more expensive than ABC, then we have to make sacrifices somewhere else. Then I would give him a couple of choices - no soda and sweet treats for a month, or no trip to the beach, something like that. That does a couple of things - it makes him feel that he has input, control, and a voice, and lets you keep the budget in line.

Good luck and let us know how you resolve this!

BellaBoo

Huh? Anyone can. If your clothing budget for the teen is $50 or $2000, then that's all they get. It's not a matter of how much, it's letting them choose what they spend it on.

moonwork42029

To me... driving the extra 15 minutes each way would end up being an extra 30 minutes each way...waiting for them to get in the car while complaining etc.

That extra 30 minutes or extra 60 minutes (both ways of the trip) would not be worth the $12 difference in price.

After the midnight showing, it's going to be around 1:30 or so before you get back on the road....that 15/30 minutes could be a problem if you are overly tired. Do you have to take each girl home or are they all staying with you?

I am guessing since you said the other girls houses are quite large the money isn't an issue with them or their parents. The other parents are probably glad "they" aren't the one going at midnight so they can have the night off.


Concede this small trial...it's really not worth your time or the sadness/pouting you'll have to live with....HOWEVER I'd not make it an "Okay you win"...but rather an "Okay, I won't embarrass you in front of your friends by making you go to the "old" movie theater, BUT you must encourage your friends to do a fund raiser for "a favorite charity" or help someone less fortunate" type of conceding. (clear as mud?)

gzuslivz

The reason doesn't really matter. It probably won't make much sense to you. I would go halves on the ticket to the closer theater. Take your own snacks, unless she wants to buy them herself. If it's that important to her, try to work it out. But she needs to assume some of the responsibility for the cost. Life is short. Enjoy her, drama and all!

GladGrams

14 is awfully young to be together with 6 others her age at midnight in a theater in a shopping mall area.

Melodrama is part of life for a teen girl. Making sensible decisions is part of being a teen's parent.

I like the idea of problem solving with her regarding the "details" of the situation involving the friend's group. 14 yr old females are notoriously manipulative. :evil:

Checking with the other parents sets a precedence in which she understands you will check things out and you will protect her (from herself and others bad decision-making)

It's better to have a kid angry with you than to have one harmed (hate to consider how) and have to pick up those emotional pieces for the rest of her life.

Be the parent and be strong - some day this may end up being "one of those" stories she tells her children.

:D

Edie

I agree with you. And that being said, to teach a child and I do mean child because they do not understand the value of money and have to be taught and what better way than to show them that the movie is the same, the pop is the same, the popcorn is the same and the candy bars in the purse are the same, what does the theatre have to do with any of it except to be where the movie is shown. You decide where YOU will take them and what YOU can afford and they can either do it YOUR way or not. It may just be that your daughter would rather go to the less expensive movie theatre, but because of peer pressure has to choose a more expensive theatre, and put you right in the middle of it. We always told our son that if there was something he was not truly comfortable with to tell his friends his parents won't allow it, won't go along with it, won't give him the money for it. We'd be the bad guys, let him off the hook and everything was just fine and none of his friends ever knew the real reason. This is just my take on things. These kids are just children and we are their parents. The kids nowdays don't understand what situation this country is in right now and money is getting tight and if they want something bad enough, they will earn it! Get a job, babysit, mow lawns, our son mowed lawns from the time he was 11 years old until the day before he graduated from the University of Minnesota.

Good luck to you - go to the less expensive theatre. The cute guys will always be there. I should know, I married one - 51 years ago!!!!! Edie

delma_paulk

In 20 years you will laugh about this!
Teenagers are so dramatic, just do what you think best and she will probably comply.

Had 4 teenage daughters......survival is sometimes questioned.

Stitchit123

THESE FOLLOWING WORDS ARE FROM MY BROTHER =A FATHER OF 3 GIRLS= They gotta be COOL Seen at only the coolest places Wear only the coolest cloths shoes jewelry etc etc as long as its OPM... Give her options --You'll give her $12 period she then can opt for the over priced ticket and no snacks OR the cheap ticket and snacks But heres the hard part AS the PARENT You can ONLY give her $12 NO matter which option she chooses He said it was a good lesson on money management Little GrassHoppers spent their movie nite money wisely Tickets and snacks :-)