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Thread: Went to Son's house today...

  1. #1
    Super Member Tink's Mom's Avatar
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    This is just a little rant....I had to buy a new iron around 6 months ago, because #1 son had borrowed mine and broke it. I gave him an old one that I didn't like, figuring that it would save me the aggrevation of him taking mine...
    I went to press the quilt squares for MimiSharons' girls and NO IRON! I looked everywear...Sent to squares off to Terri's without ironing :cry: ... called #1 son in morning, asked where my iron was,,,and he claims he doesn't have it....
    I went over to his house this morning...and in his bedroom, on top of the dresser is my new iron... :? I poured out my cup of coffee, picked up my iron and purse, gave him a LOOK and walked out of the house.........

    By the time I got home he was on the answering machine, Mom, I'm sorry, I thought you had more irons....................

  2. #2
    Super Member kwhite's Avatar
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    OHHH How I know how you feel. Do what I do. Keep telling yourself over and over out loud. "it could be worse. They could be on drugs, or drinking or pregnant without a stable partner, or......." I remember a particularly bad time with our daughter and my husband and I went out to dinner. Unbeknownst to me there was a friend sitting on the other side of the barrier from us. She said later she didn't want to disturb us cause we seemed to be in deep conversation and we kept saying over and over to one another "it could be worse, it could be worse" LOL

  3. #3
    Super Member Shemjo's Avatar
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    Boundaries are difficult for some people to understand! :?

  4. #4
    community benefactor Knot Sew's Avatar
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    Get him stuff he borrows..or takes for the next gift occasions. The fibbing about it is what hurts :roll:

  5. #5
    Power Poster BellaBoo's Avatar
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    I detest not finding something in it's place when I need it. The kids learned early and fast I would ground them for not puttng an item back where it belongs.


  6. #6
    Power Poster Ninnie's Avatar
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    Lock your doors, if he has keys, change the locks. I love my kids (7) but they know I will not let them run over me. It's hard to set boundries, I wasn't very good with the first, but by the time the last one came along I had it down Pat! :lol: :lol:


    Ninnie

  7. #7
    Moderator littlehud's Avatar
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    When mine first moved back home they had problems with boundaries. The girls have learned and ask before borrowing. My son still has problems with it. I keep trying to tell myself it's because he is handicapped. Still bothers me. So sorry he lied to you. That's the worst.

  8. #8
    Super Member sewjoyce's Avatar
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    Yep, the borrowing was bad enough but the lying about it would have sent me over the edge too! I think you did the right thing and maybe your son has learned a lesson.

  9. #9
    Super Member Bill'sBonBon's Avatar
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    That is almost funny, thought you had more irons. Same thing happened to me only it was a nordic,very heavy,very nice bundt pan. She said she had squaters rights,laughing all the while and she still has it. If I had all the tubberware that went to my dds' and seem to never come back I could set me up a stall in a flea market and sell it. :lol: :lol: I call them and no I don't have it Mom you must have loaned it to someone and forgot who. So Glad I only have 2. :lol:
    BillsBonBon

  10. #10
    Power Poster Mousie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Ninnie
    Lock your doors, if he has keys, change the locks. I love my kids (7) but they know I will not let them run over me. It's hard to set boundries, I wasn't very good with the first, but by the time the last one came along I had it down Pat! :lol: :lol:


    Ninnie
    Sometimes, when reading a thread, I stop and reply when i get to another one, that fits the way I feel...maybe read the rest out of curiosity after I say...
    Ninnie's right.
    Don't let your son run over you, and it is hard to set boundaries sometimes, bc you have this past history, but it doesn't have to keep being your future.
    Buy new locks...today!!!
    and if you give him a key, then you are telling him:
    that, well, ok, it's alright if you come in my house, when I am not home and take something of mine, and when I ask about it, you can tell me whatever you want to. If I find out, and come and get it, all you have to do, is say, 'sorry', until you feel like doing it again.

  11. #11
    Super Member JoanneS's Avatar
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    I used to check their cars to make sure they weren't taking my small oriental rugs with them! They were great kids, but it took them a while to learn that 'What's mine is MINE!'

  12. #12
    Power Poster Mousie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by JoanneS
    I used to check their cars to make sure they weren't taking my small oriental rugs with them! They were great kids, but it took them a while to learn that 'What's mine is MINE!'
    I have a youngest daughter that doesn't take anything, but when she borrows something, I have learned to ask for it in a bit, bc she will forget about it, and then think it was something I gave her.
    another daughter would never take anything, but still had a key, and she did tell me, but she came over while we were gone and used my sewing machine, after I got my own room.
    Sorry, but, I'd like to be there. I want to be able to work on presents and leave them all spread out, and now, with my Janomes???? really want to be there, if somebody uses them. I have good kids, but none of them take as good care of their stuff as I do. I always have, bc nothing has been free, and now we are on fixed income, may be all that's coming up the turnpike, lol!

    Tink'smom...good for you, for confronting your son and walking out. So, what if you had a dozen irons...they are still yours. :wink:

  13. #13
    Super Member Tink's Mom's Avatar
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    Thanks for listening to my rant... After thinking about this, he has been responsible for the loss of 3 irons, 1 vacumn cleaner, numerous hot glue guns, 1 camera,and a cappacino machine.
    I just don't know with that one..............does he think I buy irons in bulk?

  14. #14
    Super Member dvseals's Avatar
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    Maybe next time he wants to borrow something have him pay you a deposit
    and tell him when he returns the item he'll get his deposit back. ;)
    Make sure the deposit is more than enough to replace the item and extra for the hassle of getting it replaced in case it doesn't come home.

    I'm kind of lucky mine don't borrow stuff they leave stuff instead,
    so I end up carrying it around and moving it from one storage area
    to another until I either wait til they show up and hand it to them and tell
    'm to take it home or I get rid of it.

  15. #15
    Super Member MollieSue's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tink's Mom
    I just don't know with that one..............does he think I buy irons in bulk?
    Sorry I am laughing! lol!!!! Welcome to my world! Not so much now, as when they were younger, especially my youngest two! My youngest was heavily into electronics, and if he needed a plug, would cut it off a box fan or whatever, took the lcd light thingys off my garage door soon after I bought my house, etc, etc. When Dave & I met, I told him to keep his tools out of sight. He didn't listen. He let them borrow them.... He said his kids were the same way.
    All of our kids are very responsible, very loving and caring, would do anything for us at the drop of a hat.
    Just something about if it's Mom or Dad's, then it's almost a freebie. But they've all mostly outgrown it now. :-)

  16. #16
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    When our daughter got her first home, she somehow thought it was best to shop at home, saved herself tons of money. One day I couldn't find a broom, mop, vacuum, any cleaning supplies and the roast we were going to have for dinner. Oh, and most of the toilet paper and paper towels were missing. Hmmm... guess who had to haul all the crap back and clean our kitchen and cook dinner. The lesson was a hard one, but she learned :) :) :) :) Sometimes you just wonder if they hit their head one too many times when they were little.

  17. #17
    Power Poster amma's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tink's Mom
    This is just a little rant....I had to buy a new iron around 6 months ago, because #1 son had borrowed mine and broke it. I gave him an old one that I didn't like, figuring that it would save me the aggrevation of him taking mine...
    I went to press the quilt squares for MimiSharons' girls and NO IRON! I looked everywear...Sent to squares off to Terri's without ironing :cry: ... called #1 son in morning, asked where my iron was,,,and he claims he doesn't have it....
    I went over to his house this morning...and in his bedroom, on top of the dresser is my new iron... :? I poured out my cup of coffee, picked up my iron and purse, gave him a LOOK and walked out of the house.........

    By the time I got home he was on the answering machine, Mom, I'm sorry, I thought you had more irons....................
    I had to smile but also share your frustration :wink: :roll: :x I guess I would approach this a little differently....I would probably go to visit him and bring a BIG empty purse....when his back was turned I would fill it with a few things that he may miss over the next few days....can opener, razor, all the clean socks in his sock drawer, meat out of his freezer, and sit back and wait for him to call. I would tell him my can opener broke, I ran out of razors, I needed more white socks for dust rags and his meat looked better than what I had in my freezer :lol: :shock: :roll: :lol: 8) 8) 8) But that is just ME.......

  18. #18
    Super Member dvseals's Avatar
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    amma that's just evil.... I LOVE It ;)

  19. #19
    Super Member tslowery's Avatar
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    I agee with amma. Love love love it. :wink: :wink: :wink: :lol: :lol: :lol:

  20. #20
    Super Member Tink's Mom's Avatar
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    Amma, Love it!!! I have warned him that someday I am going to come over put my feet(with shoes) on the furniture. Track mud in and do my best to trash his place as he has done in his younger days....

    Of course, I have promised to do this for at least the last 20 years...

  21. #21
    Super Member omak's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by amma
    Quote Originally Posted by Tink's Mom
    By the time I got home he was on the answering machine, Mom, I'm sorry, I thought you had more irons....................
    I had to smile but also share your frustration :wink: :roll: :x I guess I would approach this a little differently....I would probably go to visit him and bring a BIG empty purse....when his back was turned I would fill it with a few things that he may miss over the next few days....can opener, razor, all the clean socks in his sock drawer, meat out of his freezer, and sit back and wait for him to call. I would tell him my can opener broke, I ran out of razors, I needed more white socks for dust rags and his meat looked better than what I had in my freezer :lol: :shock: :roll: :lol: 8) 8) 8) But that is just ME.......
    ROFLOL ... THIS is PRICELESS! ROFLOL ... amma ... the mother from hell! What a wonderful woman! LOL

  22. #22
    Super Member 2 Doods's Avatar
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    Sounds like you better collect a few more irons or give him one on his next birthday.

    I'd be happy if my son even knew HOW to use one. Or DH for that matter! I tried to teach them but I think they pretend they can't just so I will do the ironing for them. (DH admitted once to that effect)

    Bet your son will be trying to make up to you for Mother's Day.....hmmmm...might be a good oportunity there for you :lol:

  23. #23
    Super Member omak's Avatar
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    actually! I think Tink's mom understated her problem!
    I have been bemusedly reading all the comments, and it struck me!

    I'll bet that besides looking frantically for your iron, you were mad at YOURSELF for not taking better care of it, berating yourself because you knew your mind was going, but you hadn't realized how bad you had gotten, trying to remember the last class you had taken it to ...

    Now, you not only have to remember every move you have made over the last six weeks, your son is making you remember every move HE makes! Shame on the youngster ... doesn't he know that you are fragile???
    I still think amma has the proper response .... LOL

  24. #24
    Senior Member sewaholic's Avatar
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    Who was it that said - "For this I got stretch marks" :lol:

  25. #25
    Power Poster Mousie's Avatar
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    Quote Originally Posted by Tink's Mom
    Thanks for listening to my rant... After thinking about this, he has been responsible for the loss of 3 irons, 1 vacumn cleaner, numerous hot glue guns, 1 camera,and a cappacino machine.
    I just don't know with that one..............does he think I buy irons in bulk?
    LOL!!! :lol:
    Just as a joke, wonder what he would do, if he came in one day, and there were little post its all over everything:
    MINE! :evil:

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