Motivation Badly needed
#1
My DH passed away in August and I haven't been near my sewing room since he took ill in June. We both quilted and he and I would shop for fabric, supplies etc together. In fact he was the one who usually cleaned up the sewing room because if it wasn't neat he couldn't work in there.
I have been piling everything I didn't need in there and now it is a real mess and I can't bring myself to clean it out.l Ireally need encouragement to do this. Both of us had UFO's that have to be finished and I so badly want to go it there, but for some reason I can't bring myself to do it. Have any of you had a situation like this and what did you do to motivate yourself.
I have been piling everything I didn't need in there and now it is a real mess and I can't bring myself to clean it out.l Ireally need encouragement to do this. Both of us had UFO's that have to be finished and I so badly want to go it there, but for some reason I can't bring myself to do it. Have any of you had a situation like this and what did you do to motivate yourself.
#3
I felt the same way about my mom's things, until I realized it made me sadder not to take care of things for my dad than leaving it be. Just had to set my mind and wade in. You may have to start with small steps and leave the room when it's too much. Play some kind of upbeat, happy music. Blessings and kind thoughts to you. Good luck.
#4
Super Member
Join Date: Oct 2010
Location: Iowa
Posts: 8,816
Go in with a box. Fill that box and go out to another room. Start to sort. When done return and do the same. Eventually the space will become friendly again and the rush of memories won't sit on you so heavily as you sit in the room trying to do this.
I find a fresh air place (cold or not open a window or get air moving). Invite a friend to the "new space" for coffee, but the sorting must be yours; perhaps they will visit as you work as well.
This is a tough, but not impossible time. I am with you and know that you will find peace soon.
I find a fresh air place (cold or not open a window or get air moving). Invite a friend to the "new space" for coffee, but the sorting must be yours; perhaps they will visit as you work as well.
This is a tough, but not impossible time. I am with you and know that you will find peace soon.
#5
Power Poster
Join Date: Jul 2010
Location: Eastern Washington
Posts: 29,525
So sorry for your great loss! How wonderful that you both did sewing/quilting!! Maybe you can work on some of the UFO's so you can keep them as special momentos. What a treasure! Take it one step at a time, and keep your faith and courage. You will get stronger! Hugs to you~
#6
Super Member
Join Date: Aug 2009
Location: The middle of an IL cornfield
Posts: 7,014
August wasn't that long ago. Don't beat yourself up. Try to straighten things a bit each day. Looking at all those things will make you cry, but it will probably make you laugh, too. It sounds like there are many happy memories in there. Just think how wonderful you will feel when you finish up one of his UFO's and cuddle on the couch with it.
#7
So sorry for your loss.Do you have a family member or buddy that quilts? If so , have a remembrance/organizing party. When my GM passed away, my mom , aunt & I had a remembrance party, we cried, laughed & ate and remembered the good times all while we sorted and organized. We all agreed that we never could have done it alone. Once everything had been sorted, it was easy to tackle whatever needed doing. Looking back it helped me deal with her passing and I made other memories with my mom & aunt. Will add you to my prayer list.
#8
Super Member
Join Date: Mar 2010
Location: North Carolina
Posts: 2,375
I would first take your UFO's and put them together in a safe place. A nice place. Just let them rest there. If that means the tote needs to go to another room for awhile, then do that.
And then, I'd go pet your fabric stash. I assume you both had a shared stash....I'd visit it. And just sort. Whatever your favorite method is...get all the blues together. Get all the 30's repros together. Just *enjoy* the stash. You don't have to DO anything to it. Think of it as a walk down memory lane.
Of course "other stuff" that doesn't belong in the sewing area needs to go. Could it be a way to "hide" the fact that your hubby has passed on? Like, not looking at the empty space means that it's not really real? I dunno...that's something for you to think about. And, you may not have the answer today, tomorrow, or next week. Take all the time you need.
And then, I'd go pet your fabric stash. I assume you both had a shared stash....I'd visit it. And just sort. Whatever your favorite method is...get all the blues together. Get all the 30's repros together. Just *enjoy* the stash. You don't have to DO anything to it. Think of it as a walk down memory lane.
Of course "other stuff" that doesn't belong in the sewing area needs to go. Could it be a way to "hide" the fact that your hubby has passed on? Like, not looking at the empty space means that it's not really real? I dunno...that's something for you to think about. And, you may not have the answer today, tomorrow, or next week. Take all the time you need.
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