It's the other way around with us.
DH wants me to buy things and supports me in all my quilting as he knows how important it is to me.
But he also knows I won't buy things I don't have the money for.
It's not to me to judge you, but I think you are not feeling good about it because else you wouldn't have written this post.
I agree with neesie's last two sentences.....but who am I??;)

He'll never find out about it because it came out of my checking account. I told him it was $29 cheaper than it actually was. I looked it up online on ebay and I paid $169. I've been talking to him about the Go Baby and he thought it was too much because of having to buy all the dies and mats so when I saw this on ebay, I went and bought it with my own money. But I thought he wouldn't appreciate that it was so much less than a Go Baby with accessories, so I did lie and tell him I paid $140. I think I will keep my trap shut and not spend any more money on quilting for a while so the guilt will subside. I usually spend $200 a month on fabric and gismos every month, but I had already spent that and this was on top of it. But I am going to keep my mouth shut because I agree that it will do more harm to tell him I was dishonest.

That seems like a petty argument to justify one's lie.

Regardless of where the money came from......yours, his or a joint account. You feel pangs of guilt over the deception.

And to keep quiet will only fester and come out in other ways.

But only you know your marriage, we don't so good luck and hope all ends well.

Same here, my husband has me buy whatever I need or desire. Right now, he is pushing for me to pick out and buy a long arm quilting machine. And I am digging in my heels till I find a bargain on one. I am leaning towards the Bailey's Home Quilter 13.

I'm confused If you WON IT! Why do you have to LIE about anything?



i

I would not have volunteered any information about it. You think it's your money, right? Why say anything? Since you have already volunteered information, I would simply not add to it.

Why does your husband think it's his money? Why do you feel it necessary to justify your purchases to him? Does he have any hobbies?

It seems to me that wives bring these problems on themselves by raising expectations in the husbands that the men have final say in every little thing that goes on in the household. Why do wives feel the need for permission? I make some purchasing decisions independent of my husband, he makes some purchasing decisions independent of me, and we collaborate on major purchasing decisions. I can see raising objections over a $1,000 purchase without consultation, but not over a $200 decision. Maybe it depends on household income? Not sure.....

Edit: I just read the second page of posts (after all this time, WHY do I still forget to check for another page???) and saw your second post. I would just hold back on purchasing more quilting stuff for a month to make up for this purchase. And go on with life from there.....

Since you asked...
Lying about it was bad enough, but deciding not to come clean quickly just makes it worse. Your only concern seems to be about easing your own conscience, not about undermining your husband's trust in you and the damage that can do to a relationship. Perhaps it's time to examine your priorities.

ICON, I think she won the bid. I'm not sure. Maybe we need to find out.ha.

I don't and can't lie about things like this ... not just because of the ethics of it, but hubby and I share the same pay-pay account :)

In fact, yesterday he said to me "I can't believe you spent $99.00 on fabric this weekend" (an online purchase). I argued with him VEHEMENTLY that I most assuredly did NOT spend $99.00 on fabric.

I spent it on thread :)

It was a really good sale!!