Yes, I have given them as gifts and yes, as others say "people do not realize the time and effort put into the quilt." Now I only give them to people who know me and understand the hours, thought, time, and love with each stitch.

That is exactly why I am very picky about the people to which I give quilts. I don't think I could take them not making a fuss over something to which I've poured my heart and soul.

A few years ago I made a beautiful quilt for my 30 yr. old step-daughter and when I saw it a year later it had 3 cigarette burns on it - she ironed a patch on them. She had a baby last year - I refused to make a quilt for her. I have made 4 quilts for my daughter and she sleeps with them every night. I just assume some people appreciate quilts more than others and leave it at that.

I wonder if some people don't realize it's hand made and not store bought. I would think they would be more appreciative if there was some way to convey that when the quilt is given.

To Pollyv9
I'm glad that your daughter-in-law appreciates the work and beauty of quilts. I'm only sorry that she has but her burden of finding a present on you. I would tell her that since so much time, energy and money go into your quilts you have chosen to give them only to a few chosen people. Each quilt is a gift of yourself. Your daughter-in-law asking for quilts for her family may be irritating because she is taking advantage of you. If she isn't purchasing the supplies and paying you for your time you have become a free source of presents.

It saddens me to read that so many of us have had our giftes taken for granted. Without a simple note of gratitude.

I have made two baby quilts for the daughters of friends. I mailed the quilts to the friends to give to the daughters and they emailed to let me know how "fabulous" they were. Never heard a word from the daughters. I don't do that anymore. If I am invited to a baby shower I will make and take one. I have plenty of other elderly folks that need a throw to waste my time and fabric on folks who cannot even thank you. That is my story and I am sticking to it!

i know all about that notake care of from my youngest daughter made her a quilt that was a difficult pattern and gave it to her she was thrilled & within three months it was hanging up as a room divider with nails holding it up and then i looked at it and there was a cigarette burn hole in it and a big red kool aid stain will be a long time before i make her another one.

I guess my big question to you is what kind of thank you are you looking for? I don't mean to sound heartless but I've found that unless people make things themselves (any craft, not just quilts), they are not going to thoroughly understand all that went into it.

A simple thank you or in your case the quilt being a big hit, would be more than acceptable for me. I give because I so enjoy the giving. I don't expect a thank you, however I won't turn one down. I give to some individuals knowing they will never appreciate the gift as much as another might, but it makes me feel good to give it anyway. If I didn't get pleasure out of gifting or did it only to get praise, I'd probably stop quilting altogether. What would be the point in just piling up quilts in my own closet? :)

Oh yes, my sister asked if I was going to make a baby quilt for her new Grandbaby so I did. I'm still waiting for a thank you. Her daughter just has another baby and guess what I'm NOT going to make one.

I would be happy with a telephone call. Any kind of Thank you would be good for me.

We have all been there, done that.
Baby quilts all nieces and nephews wait for.
lots of quilters in our family.
A few years ago, I had a ten year old, tell me he still uses
his baby blanket. Babies get attached to them you know.
It just takes a word from a little one to make you forget
about not being thanked by others.
I was hurt once by knowing my dad gave something away.
But it was his to give as I gave to him. He just thought that other person would enjoy it and keep it. Yes quilts take time but also buying a gift does also. Not everyone likes what you do.
When you give a gift, it does not matter what it is, it is theirs .
We have all received things that we later put in yard sales and never touched. Same with a quilt. Just that we put our heart and souls into them.
I say I will be more careful with whom I give a quilt, but who knows what they do with it.
If a person tells me thank you of any sort, I am happy.
Thank you at time of present is enough for me as I know how lax others are at sending thank yous.

I love to make baby quilts for family. When I made one for a nephew, his mother laughed and said his older brother (then 14) wondered if he would have to share his with his new brother. I was amazed a 14-year-old boy was so attached to his baby quilt, but yet quite willing to share.

I am probably going to be slam dunked on this answer but I would like to share it anyway.

When you made the quilt, you did it with a giving heart I hope. I know you would love for the response to be thank you and what a wonderful present. But you must remember that you are dealing with humans and that may have been that person's way of saying thank you. That person probably do not know you felt the way you did. When you give something from you heart, don't worry about the thank you. God has a better thank you than man can provide. Keep giving and many good things will be given back to you. Plus if you dwell on this, that person is controlling your emotions and doesn't even know it. Just give because you love giving and expect nothing in return. What a blessing you will be.

Quiltbaby

My thought is we all LOVE to quilt, just let it go and make another one. You'll be happy doing it.

WOW! Beautiful. Please make me a quilt!

It's not just quilts. Don't we all know folks who don't thank anyone for anything? Unfortunately, I'm acquainted with too many of those kinds of people! Someone forgot to teach them good manners.

Thanks for this reminder Quiltbaby - I just found out my niece is pregnant after suffering a miscarriage a few years ago. I will continue to make quilts for my nieces/nephews etc. because I enjoy doing so.
Last year I made 2 quilts for a co-worker's twins and even tho I didn't get a thank you from his wife I did get the pleasure of knowing their first pictures were taken while laying on my quilts!

One of my PL blanketeers told us that she usually makes the 6 hour quilts for her Grandkids so that when she sees them dragged out in the dirt or around on the floor it doesn't bother her. She makes the "good" quilts when they get married or when they are adults. I am just happy to see them being used however they get used because you know that they enjoy them. I expect that quilts for kids or around kids are going to be dragged in the dirt.

The only baby quilt I've ever made was for my niece. She was a preemie and I wanted to give her a special gift to celebrate her first Christmas. I had all grandparents, aunts, uncles and cousins sign a block and then embroidered over the names so they would be there forever. The quilt was a Christmas themed quilt. My sister only lets her have it at Christmas time. My niece has been asking for another quilt and I will be giving it to her for her 7th birthday this year. It won't match her bedroom, but both her mother and I know that she will love it! As long as I see her use it, I don't need a thank you.

Both my sisters and I still have quilts that were given to us when we were babies by my aunt. They may not be in great shape now, but we still love them as much as ever and they play an important part in our childhood memories.

I won't make my older niece a quilt because I don't think she'd appreciate it as much as the younger one.

I can totally relate to all of your stories. I made a quilt recently for my nephew's new son. Never heard a word. I'd like to say I don't care, but a simple thank you would do wonders. I will continue to make them and give them away tho. I just won't be holding my breath waiting on a thank you from people who have no manners. Most of my quilts go to Quilts For Kids. I'm positive they appreciate them. If you don't expect a thank you and you get one, all the better.

Well my grand Daughter knew I was making her a quilt for her B-day, she even picked the colors! Her B-day was on Christmas too! Well with all the holday stuff going on I didn't get it done in time so she got a iou and in a few weeks after I had it ready for her! Her comment was " Its about time you got this done" No I love it or thanks! I think she was 8 at the time!

Gee, I thought I was the only one who's work is not appreciated. Now I only make wall hangings, quilts for ME. I think what upsets me the most is, none of my family sews, don't even own sewing machines. I told my son when I'm gone, (I'm 84), to put my sewing machines, and fabrics on Ebay.

i made a quilt for my first dgd, and then made a quilt for my second gd..

my dear dear dil, (first dgd) put it up so it would stay nice, i told her give the kid the quilt..if she wrecks it buy dragging it everywhere, i'll make her another one

the not so dear dil (2nd gd) got the quilt & used it under the new tv so it wouldn't scratch the new entertainment center.

when dear dear dil was pregnant the second time & we knew it would be a gs, i took her to the lqs & let her pick put the main fabric and the secondary fabric. i bought enough to make the dust ruffle for the crib as well as the crib bumpers to match... she was haunting the mailbox waiting for the box

when not so dear dil was pregnant and we had another gs, i sent a toys r us gift certificate.

somethings are just not worth tying yourself up into knots about!

I think the real issue here is the fact that when you receive a gift of any kind, it's just appropriate and good manners to say thank you. I always told my boys to say it like they meant it (even if they didn't) and one of these days it would come naturally and they would mean it.

When you give a kid a quilt you have to know if the love it they will drag it around and that is good by my eyes!
I make the little kids 2 sided flannel blankies and they love those and simple enough to make several! I use 1 1/2 yds of too and do a sew and turn and top stitch!

Yes, that happened to me too. I was hurt because as you know even the smaller quilt involves a lot of work.

A lot of interesting comments on this topic. I promised myself (after breast cancer/chemotherapy) I'd make a quilt for each of our 14 grandchildren. Instead of picking the pattern and fabrics myself, I get them involved with the process. So far, this approach seems to be working. I've made 6 and they seem to really like them...from what I can tell!

I made a twin quilt for my niece a year ago. The deal was we would meet for lunch and give it to her...a year ago. That did not work out and other times have not to work out so I am keeping this quilt until they come and pick it up!!
Now our son who is 42 was in tears with happiness for the quilt I sent him...
My attitude is I do what works for me...learn my lessons and move on.

I would think they should know it is handmade, especially if you have a label on it. A friend of mine puts labels on that say
Handmade by Sue

I spent a lot of time on a baby quilt for a co-worker. When she opened it she ohhed and ahhed over it for about 30 seconds then said, it will be put to good use on the floor for the dog and baby. Talk about feeling hurt, if I wanted it for the dog, I would have given her an old rug.

Oh my gosh. That is awful. I don't know whether I would have cried or hit her!

I have the opposite problem. I'm terrified to give a gift that the user would feel obligated to use/display if it's not to their liking. After all the work, I want it to be PRE-wanted.

I never give quilts as gifts anymore because of that. I only make and give to those who I personally know will appreciate them. Myxxx of a son in law put it over the dog cage and my sister in law gave it away. However my brother in law's wife asked me to teach her to quilt (she is chinese) and now she has a business on e-bay and is supporting him. Cant figure out who the fool was here but she is happy . she is the only sister in law that I talk quilting with the others well lets not get into that. I feel your pain about the quilts.

here to cheer you on my friend

Two things stand out from this thread to me

1. the comment that the giver assumes the recipient is so overwhelmed with joy that they are speechless and that explains why they don't say thank you. What a perfect way to re-frame the event so you aren't disappointed!

2. the person who posted that she just does Quilts for Kids now. The kids that get them don't thank us for making them and we just assume they love them. Maybe they don't but we don't know. Maybe we need to work on assuming the quilts gifted to those we know are loved even if we don't hear thanks.

my Son used his to sit a case of oil on in his trunk. ouch ouch ouch. so he gets shirts for Christmas :_ :) :)

I agree with hazeljane. Once the quilt leaves my house its gone in every respect. Have no expectations from recipients. Even if my quilts are walked on, etc., they are being used and this makes me happy. I hope it doesn't sound like bragging, but everyone to whom I have given a quilt seemed genuinely happy to receive it.

This generation of teenagers (and some grownups) need to realize a thank you note is a valuable tool.[/quote]
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Isn't THAT the truth! I discovered a way, one of the ways, to request a
thank you gift. (other than simply never giving another)
I took 2 crude, hand written letters from a pair of little girls (who didn't know
each other) thanking me for gifts of an old purse with a lot of old, glittery fake
jewelry I had given them. One of these letters is about 5 years old!

Showing them these letters in place of an eagerly awaited gift, then leaving,
kinda made a big difference. Months later, right after Christmas, I did get real
nice letters from that person!!! And for a small gift, not the real big expected
one either!

Don't feel bad. I handquilted my sister a queen size cheaters cloth quilt. It took 9 of us (experienced hand quilters, aunts and friends) quilting 3 days to get it done as an anniversary gift. She divorced, lived with another guy for 4 years and LEFT IT WITH HIM! because he didn't have any bedding. I will NEVER make her another thing! And I told her so but it didn't faze her. She values nothing! Can you tell I am angry!